Colorado Nesties
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4 losses: Blighted ovum 1/11, CP 12/11, CP 3/12, and our perfectly healthy baby girl Charlotte Grace, missed M/C 5/31/12 at 8w5d
Surprise unmedicated BFP 9/21/12!! Beta #1 9/22 (10 DPO): 46 Beta #2 9/24 (12 DPO): 226! Heartbeat 136 bpm at 7w! It's a BOY! Theodore Joshua 5/23/13 7:36am 7lb 13 oz, 19.25 in
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Things NOT to say
This from my "best friend" who I am currently considering never speaking to again...
"You need to stop being so upset and thinking of it as a baby. It was just a ball of cells."
ETA: This is also the friend I've told some of you about who, after my last miscarriage when I made a comment about feeling like a bad mom who couldn't stay pregnant, she said, "But you're not a mom." DH is defending her saying she just has no idea how this feels, but I just think there are some things that common sense tells you not to say.
4 losses: Blighted ovum 1/11, CP 12/11, CP 3/12, and our perfectly healthy baby girl Charlotte Grace, missed M/C 5/31/12 at 8w5d
Surprise unmedicated BFP 9/21/12!! Beta #1 9/22 (10 DPO): 46 Beta #2 9/24 (12 DPO): 226! Heartbeat 136 bpm at 7w! It's a BOY! Theodore Joshua 5/23/13 7:36am 7lb 13 oz, 19.25 in
Re: Things NOT to say
I'm sorry Z:-( there are some people out there who are just so insensitive
oh HALE no.
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Tizzle 10/07 ~ Boppy 7/09 ~ Chicken 1/12
2014 Reading Goal: 85
Yeah, I know I open myself up for ridiculous comments by telling everyone, but I felt really alone the first time this happened, and I never want anyone else to feel like they're the only one. But still, people need to think about what comes out of their mouths (or keyboards). It doesn't really hurt my feelings that my friend said that, it more infuriates me that she's that clueless and apathetic. There have been other similar incidents with her in the past, and I've about had it.
4 losses: Blighted ovum 1/11, CP 12/11, CP 3/12, and our perfectly healthy baby girl Charlotte Grace, missed M/C 5/31/12 at 8w5d
Surprise unmedicated BFP 9/21/12!! Beta #1 9/22 (10 DPO): 46 Beta #2 9/24 (12 DPO): 226! Heartbeat 136 bpm at 7w! It's a BOY! Theodore Joshua 5/23/13 7:36am 7lb 13 oz, 19.25 in
YIKES. I assume she doesn't have kids. Which, if that is the case, should be her first clue to say nothing but, "I am so sorry and here for you."
Take some time and space but if you are really that close with her, I think eventually it will be important to let her know how you feel about her comment. ((Hugs))
Growing Up Olson
I am so, so sorry. For what you friend said and for the whole situation (I wasn't really on here even to lurk much the last couple of days).
I've had 3-4 CPs in the last year (one I didn't even bother with a beta, I was just growing so weary of it all and sure enough it went negative again), so if there's anything I can do, please let me know.
insert foot in mouth!
I'm sorry
Some people just don't know how to appropriately respond to things.
That sucks! I'm so sorry someone would say that. I think it might be time to have a heart to heart with this "friend" if you want to keep the friendship.
((HUGS))
Wow. I'm so sorry she said those things to you. Sounds like she needs you to explain to her how hurtful those words are. I have learned a lot here on the nest that I didn't know was so bad before, so sometimes people just need to be told. If you are truly best friends, I think this would be worth discussing. If you're too hurt, I completely understand that, too.
HUGS!
Wow... that is definitely not a good "friend". I don't think the fact that she does not have children would be an excuse for her being that insensitive to you.
I don't know if I could keep my mouth shut and not tell her how the comments were rude and horrible. But I wouldn't keep this person around as a friend because there will probably be more comments like this in the future!
**hugs**
PAIF and SAIF welcome. IVF questions welcome, too.
Kind of makes you want to put your foot in her mouth quite literally.
HUGS, people are just jerks and don't even realize it sometimes.
So sorry about the CP and your crappy friend conversation. It sounds like she just doesn't get it - some people feel super sad about CP and some people don't, but no friend should minimize what you are feeling.
I think distance is a good idea - she'll understand some day and if you're meant to be super close again, it will happen on its own.
Are you united with the CCOKCs?
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