How do your SO's children refer to you?

**TakeTwo**

I've been dating someone for 5 months. He has a 3 yo DD who I have not met yet. bF mentioned last night that since I'll probably be meeting DD soon that he was thinking about what she should call me. He said he thought "Aunt my first name" would  be good. I'm not sure I like this and I told him so. I'm trying to gage why I feel this way before discussing it with him. So, I was wondering what you are called if your SO has children. I feel like just calling me by my first name is ok. Also is it appropriate for a 3yo to know that her dad has a GF? I've never dated anyone with children before.

River Pestie

I don't think referring to you as "Aunt" is appropriate. What if you end up getting married and the kid is calling you Aunt So and So...that's weird.

 

I have friends whose SO's kids called them "Miss First Name" or they just call them solely by their first name.  

NinjaPaants

I agree with RP. Aunt is not appropriate because that isn't what you are. 

I would use "Miss First Name"...

becwheat

I have a DD and though she does not have all of her words yet I call BF/SO by his first name and she responds to it (Like when I tell her to give something to BF she will). I think "Aunt" is weird and possibly confusing. You are not an Aunt or Aunt figure.

BF and I have talked about what DD will call him if/when we get engaged and I think she will call him dad. Since X is not in her life I think she may naturally come to this on her own. I am not using the word "dad" though.

UDscoobychick

BF's kids call me by my first name, but they are grown.  I've never been a super formal person, so even if they were young, I'd probably be fine with just my first name.  If you want/need/feel it's appropriate to have a title, Miss Firstname or Miss Lastname should suffice, I would think.

PrettyInPearls23

My DS is two and he calls FF by his first name.

I agree with other PP's and think that calling you "Aunt" is inappropriate. If your SO wants some kind of title in front of your first name, I think "Miss" would fit the bill. When I introduce my friends to DS, I refer to them as "Miss Jennifer" or "Mr. John".

LadyLissame

I am going to use my friends as an example since my DS is too young and I have no SO currently.

My friend's DS is 3 now. He was 1 1/2 when my friends started dating. He calls her Sina (her full name is Selina).

I have another friend whose DD called her BF at the time by his first name. Then when they got engaged, she called him Daddy (they are married now with a DS as well). I know her father is in the picture and gets her EoW, but I think she calls him daddy too....

JustTheWayYouAre

I have no experience with this as  I am not yet divorced but I agree that "aunt" just sounds weird. I would think just your first name is appropriate or if your SO wants his DD to be more formal when addressing adults calling your Miss ____ (your first name) would be fine.

MintChocoChip

The "Aunt" thing is weird to me too.  I think either your first name or Miss firstname is better.

Mominator

Other than the guy that I am currently dating, I've never dated anyone with kids before, so my only experience is with my eldest son. The 2 boyfriends that he has met (one of which is my now exH) he has just called by their first name. I think Aunt/Uncle so and so is just weird. If anything, I like PP's suggestion of having her call you Miss FirstName.

DorisWE

I agree with everyone else, calling you "aunt" is weird. My DS called my XH by his first name and continues to do so even though XH adopted him last year.  It's not a big deal.

dramaz

Ew. Aunt is weird... I would think your first name is fine.

HoolyGo

My SO's daughter is 2 and she calls me by my first name and that's how he refers to me when speaking about me. Her mother calls me Miss Firstname when referring to me, but his daughter never has used the Miss.

gioia di vivere

aunt is super weird. please don't allow his child to call you that--there is a chance it may "stick" and this would just be awkward down the road. 

I call my dad's FI by her first name, as do all of my siblings.

 I have heard younger children refer to their parents' partners by first name, Miss first name, or Mama first name (a very young cousin of mine does this, but she came up with it all on her own--the adult was introduced as "Yvette" and she calls her Mama Yvette).

MixedBerryJam

If he wants a title, I'd go with "Miss" if that's in your vocabulary. Miss Mary as opposed to Aunt Mary. I think aunt as' a title is just weird in this case. I can sort of get it when little kids call parents' close friends this, but my kids never did. But dad's girlfriend, I don't think so.

This is another post that brings me down memory lane, though. DDH always called me by my first name, but I always called him "Daddy" in front of the kids. So with our kids we were always "Daddy and Firstname." I always felt compelled to  somehow explain that I was, indeed, Mom.  My kids called me by my first name probably until they started kindergarten. It was oddly charming.

 

ETC (Edited to Clarify): Aunt is weird, Miss is not weird, but I'd still go with plain old first name.

hainesherway

My BF's daughter (who is 7) calls me by my first name.  I agree with PP that "Aunt" is weird.