Prob. Flame-Worth... I am the OW

ReturnOfKuus

You know what makes people have high enough self-esteem to avoid getting into situations like this?  Saying no to married men, and overall acting with integrity.  Of course you feel bad about yourself - there's nothing to feel good about!  Be a decent person, and you'll not only attract the like, but deserve the like.

trafficgirl

CarrotsMakeMeFat:

I won't judge you. I actually hope you listen to the ladies here and recognize that you are not in a good place.

You have so much that COULD go right for you...you moved, have a new job, a new place to live, opportunities to meet new people. This is YOUR time.

Please go to a therapist and work on your self esteem. I can imagine how exciting it was to feel loved and live in a world of secrecy, but you deserve to be loved and be the ONLY woman, not the OTHER woman. I feel like you are putting all your happiness behind this guy.

Take CHARGE today. Make a change - delete his phone number, change your # or block his...decide that today is the day you want to put yourself first. It's a new year - start out fresh. Get some therapy, maybe sign up for E Harmony and find a good guy for you.

I hope you come back and read the replies you got, b/c you really deserve to know that while you did something wrong, you can make it right.

Like I would tell anyone going through a break up - take your time to grieve. It is a significant loss in your life. Then take the time to re-build.

Good luck to you.

Excellent post, and I agree with all of it - except the part I put in bold. Do not even think about dating again until you have done some serious work in therapy.

nyg&p

CarrotsMakeMeFat:

I won't judge you. I actually hope you listen to the ladies here and recognize that you are not in a good place.

You have so much that COULD go right for you...you moved, have a new job, a new place to live, opportunities to meet new people. This is YOUR time.

Please go to a therapist and work on your self esteem. I can imagine how exciting it was to feel loved and live in a world of secrecy, but you deserve to be loved and be the ONLY woman, not the OTHER woman. I feel like you are putting all your happiness behind this guy.

Take CHARGE today. Make a change - delete his phone number, change your # or block his...decide that today is the day you want to put yourself first. It's a new year - start out fresh. Get some therapy, maybe sign up for E Harmony and find a good guy for you.

I hope you come back and read the replies you got, b/c you really deserve to know that while you did something wrong, you can make it right.

Like I would tell anyone going through a break up - take your time to grieve. It is a significant loss in your life. Then take the time to re-build.

Good luck to you.

Thank you so much Carrots. It's going to sound dumb, but I literally felt embraced by your comment.  As of today, I haven't had any contact with him in two days, which is a really big deal to me.  I really like the therapist I've found in my new city and I agree that it's my time to work on me and rebuild just for me.  I know it's going to be difficult, but I also know I cannot keep causing myself this much pain.