I have a WWYD?
I am processing my first app as a board member of our rescue. This means I do the reference checks (which I'd never done before). I met a woman on Saturday at our meet & greet. She seemed great. She sent her app on Sunday. In looking through it, I noted that she "gave away" two ferrets when she "became unexpectedly pregnant." Not thrilled about that, but the group is willing to let it slide because it was 9 years ago. She has 2 cats who needed to be brought up to date on vaxes; I let her know this and she made an appointment within an hour to get it remedied.
Then I called her mom, who was listed as a reference. I asked the standard questions, and she expressed reservations about her daughter adopting a dog. She said that her daughter works 12-hour shifts as a nurse (3 times a week), she's a single mom, and that 13 hours is a long time to leave a dog alone. And she sleeps at odd hours, which she thinks would be hard for a dog to adjust to. I told her that she would need someone to let the dog out during those 13-hour stretches, and did she think her daughter would get a dog walker? "I don't know...maybe?" Mom said that the only thing she can think of that would be good would be that having a dog would make her daughter get out and get active. I couldn't help but say, "or the opposite could happen, and she doesn't get out, and neither does the dog, and behavioral issues develop." She said her husband feels the same way about the situation and has expressed his concerns to their daughter (the applicant), who has dismissed them.
So I left that conversation feeling weird. I expected Mom to be all about it. I mean, who puts down a reference who is lukewarm? And if it were a friend, I wouldn't give it as much credence, but it's her mom. She's known her forever.
What do you think? What would you do? What would you say? I need some help!
Re: Rescue people: Come in!
Yikes.
I would probably have a longer talk with the applicant. Ask about the long shifts, ask about schedule.
If you still feel reservations, I would deny her and say that you are going to go with an app who is home a little more because the dog wouldn't do well home alone in such long shifts.
So, I'm not a rescuer, so feel free to ignore my input....
But this does not sound ideal. I mean, if her parents think it isn't ideal. Does she have other references? Maybe ask for some. A co-worker, someone who is not a friend or family member. Maybe even ask to talk to her vet. We had to authorize realize for our vet to discuss us when we adopted each of our dogs.
And another thought it to say you have a waiting period. If this lady is really passionate about THIS dog, she will stick with you. When we adopted Tinkerbelle I called or email the lady daily for status updates. And it was only a week from our application to our home visit--yes, I now realize I was being annoying!
You will forever be my best friend. I can almost feel our hugs. I will ensure everyone will know (now and in the future) what a genuine, kind, loving person you were...I already miss your laughter and our daily conversations. I love you, Samantha. May 20, 1983- February 20, 2012
I work 12s and the pups can hold it just fine, though I do try to get someone to let them out if I'm not home (this is when DH is out of town, he only works 8 hour days). While it definitely wouldn't work for a puppy, it's fine for an adult dog. If she works 12s at night (I see the reference to sleeping odd hours), I think it would work out just fine. Adult dogs sleep through the night anyway.
Honestly, 3 shifts a week gives a lot more time for hanging out with the pups every other day of the week.
Unfortunately, I think she's one of these. The director of the rescue has asked me to use my discretion here, and I'm so nervous I'll do the wrong thing.
The applicant seems to think that her sister, who lives nearby, will help with letting the dog out. But the mom said something along the lines of, "oh...well, we'll see if they're getting along that day." So it sounds like she doesn't have something reliable in mind.
The good news is that our rescue requires people to foster before finalizing adoption, for up to 30 days. So perhaps in that time she'd see that this isn't for her. Or maybe she'd work it all out. I just would hate to potentially put a sensitive dog through that if things didn't turn out well.
My Lunch Blog
Have you gotten any other apps for this dog? Does this dog have any issues (medical, behavioral)?
Honestly, if it were my foster, I'd just put the app back on the shelf and keep looking. Maybe that sounds harsh, but that's my job as a foster parent - to find the BEST home for that dog's particular needs.
If the dog has no issues and is a lazy couch potato, well... this actually might be a great home.
But if you're getting weird vibes and the other stuff isn't looking great (home not tailored for this dog...) then I'd pass.
Also... can you call the sister as a reference? Maybe daughter/mom just don't get along. Though, it does seem strange that she'd list someone who wouldn't give a glowing reference.
Just with the info you've given here, I'd pass on her.
-- Thoughts become things, choose the good ones! --
Just a thought, but when we applied to adopt from a rescue, one of the screening questions was, "how long with the dog be left alone during the workday". This might be a great question to add to the adoption application for your rescue.
In the interview, the rescue also asked us if we were planning on using doggie daycare or a dog walker , and if we looked into the cost and felt it was financially do-able. We also mentioned that family members could help out in emergency situations, and they asked if we had discussed this with them and if they were okay with it. I thought these were good questions, and they do help both you and the applicant think about how much preparation has been done. I also think it would have been fair for the rescue to have asked us to look into the cost of a dog walker before moving forward if we hadn't already, or to discuss the family member's willingness to help out if we hadn't already.