I'm having a bitter infertile day.
One of my good friends from college, who got married a few months after we did and who I know didn't plan on having kids for at least a few more years, if at all, is 4 months pregnant, and has pictures of her BFP and bump all over facebook. This kind of stuff didn't used to bother me, but for some reason this month I've actually started thinking that there's a possibility we will not have a biological child. I think it's that my second Clomid cycle resulted in nothing. I know we still have several steps we can take before it's a lost cause, but I'm so terrified. The thing I have wanted most for my entire life is to be a mom; I remember "nursing" my dolls when I was 4 and thinking I couldn't wait until I had a baby.
And I took the little boy I nanny for to the hospital to see his mom (she's an L&D nurse) and she had a patient in labor who was in jail, was going right back to jail after the birth, and had her 7-year-old in the room with her cause that was the only time she'd get to see her. And then we walked into a recovery room so that we could show off the little boy to one of the other nurses, and there was a minutes-old baby getting cleaned off and dressed by the nurse, and both parents were sitting there on their phones not even looking at their child. Why do people like that get to have kids??
Sorry for the vent, I'm just having a meltdown and DH is at hockey so I can't get a hug from him.
Re: Can I get a hug? (kind of long)
DD -- 5YO
DS -- 3YO
PAIF and SAIF welcome. IVF questions welcome, too.
PHOTOS REMOVED
Lots of hugs! Been there, done that, cried many tears. Infertility sucks but you can get through it with a happy ending. Don't ever give up hope.
Hugs! I completely understand how you are feeling.
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