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TexasHarmony
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Random - WWYD re: Guest's children's food preferences
If you were having a couple of friends over for dinner and you knew their kid only ate 2 things, would you go out of your way to make sure you had one of those two things available or just let them deal with feeding the kid beforehand.
Further, you are cooking something your kids love and is good for them, but if they see the option of one of the things the other kid wants, they will not eat what you made and will want the other thing.
Re: Random - WWYD re: Guest's children's food preferences
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I agree with this, as long as it's not a medical issue kind of thing.
G is becoming increasingly picky. But I make my meals according to what we all like overall. I made stuffed pepper soup last night, he had mostly rice with a little bit of soup. He said he didn't like it, so he didn't eat much of dinner. I'm not a restaurant, I'm not making individual meals for everyone.
I would prepare whatever you had planned. If they choose to let their child have such a limited diet then it should be their responsibilty to feed the child beforehand.
Or they could do what DH's stepdad does for his son. Bring their own microwave mac & cheese and frozen chicken nuggets when they come over for dinner.
If I were the guest-parent of that picky kid, I'd make sure I fed them before hand.
There's no way that L's going to be happy with her bowl of jambalaya (which she loves) if she saw another kid eating Chick-fil-A nuggets.
Are either of those 2 things completely terrible (I'm seeing mac & cheese or noodles or something) where a spoonful of it on your kids' plates wouldn't be so bad and would also kind of keep the peace?
i would cook what you know the guest kids like b/c i always want to make my guests feel comfortable/accomodate them (and i'm assuming it's something easy - like throwing frozen chicken nuggets/mac and cheese/cheese sticks/etc in the oven).....at the same time, i would judge the parent for coddling their kid (and yes i know, i'm not a parent and sometimes you have to feed your kids what they want or risk them staaaaaarving to death blah blah blah)
hopefully your kids will eat what you're cooking for everyone else. if not, it's not like this is a daily occurance.
if the kid will only eat macaroni & cheese or chicken nuggets, i would just fix what's getting fixed and let the parents deal with it.
honestly, that kind of picky kid i believe to be particularly enabled by the parent. we had a relative who would, before ANY family gathering where there would be eleventy billion food options, stop and get her son a chicken nugget happy meal because "otherwise he won't eat".
it sounds like you are making something that is child-friendly food, and i think that is being a good hostess.
claire is picky, has ALWAYS been picky, and i have never prepared "special" things because of her picky nature. she has learned to try things and has learned to zip it about her "oh i don't like that. it's a texture issue" or whatever. nobody needs to know about all the things you don't like or why. i find that generally, she'll find something that's offered that works for her.
(doesn't like potatoes, green beans, eggs, or pudding of any kind. will not touch fish or seafood)
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The two foods are fish sticks and chicken nuggets. Both of which my kids like, but I know they will devour pulled pork if it is available - to the point I have to threaten them to stay out of the bowl.
It isn't like it is going to be the end of the world if my kids have either of those things, but I am not a restaurant and I don't want mine to start thinking I will be a short order cook.
We all know I will give in and get the damned chicken nuggets.
Is he being treated? My cousin's son would only eat a few different things. They were things like potato chips, pudding, etc. and people just assumed he was hooked on junk food. Eventually she brought it up to his pediatrician. That combined with some other symptoms led to a diagnosis of a genetic disorder that he was able to have therapy for.
They explained that because of this disorder most foods actually tasted inedible to him.
Don't do it.
While I also like my guests to feel welcomed, that doesn't mean I become a catering service. They can feed their kids at home or before hand. Frankly, it is good for their kids to see others eating different things. I agree with PP that parents enable this behavior. I have struggled with T and, frankly, I would be mad if I went to someone's house and they catered to his pickiness. he needs to learn to a) eat other foods, and b) have manners when he eats at other people homes.
I'm currently fighting this battle with Tori and her refusal to eat vegetables. If she doesn't like the sides we are having she thinks I'll just whip her up some mac and cheese. Not anymore. Now she eats the meat I cook, must try a bite of each vegetable, and can have fruit.
anytime someone comes to my house, i cater to them - if i know someone really likes spaghetti, or steak, or chili that's probably what i would make. so i don't really see a difference in doing that for someone's kid (if it's not an inconvenience).....and really, it'd be the parents fault that i knew their kid liked/only ate xyz b/c i'm assuming i'd know that from being around the parent/kid and the parent only feeding the kid what the kid wanted. so i don't really see how they could be "mad" at me for serving what i know their kid likes
I think what V is trying to say is that if you have an extremely picky child and are working with them on it then having someone cater to them could be viewed as going against their discipline/parenting.
But if you have a picky child and you give in to them without a proublem, then you as a host catering to them would be perfectly fine.
At least that's the way I took it.
i was interpreting it as though she doesn't necessarily want to feed her own children crappy food just because visiting-kid is picky.
giving my children a healthy option, but feeding guest-child the junk food isn't fair.
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this is what I'd do for C. We always pack his food or he'll eat before after. It's not your responsibility to feed my difficult child. If you'd prefer not to have the "other" food present while your kids are eating I'd ask the couple to feed their kid before they came over. That would not offend me.
We deal with our non-medical picky eat that will throw up everything if you try to make him eat anything he doesn't like. But that's done at home so we don't torture other people.
It isn't really even that I care if my kids are having chicken nuggets of fish sticks, I think it is more the principle of not being a short order cook. When DH is gone, they get chicken nuggets + sides for dinner one night a week out of convenience for me.
I am way over thinking this.
Yes but also while I try to accommodate guests, i would not make 2 different meals for 2 adults if the husband of one is just picky. For example, we often entertain a couple where the husband is a meat eater and the wife is a vegetarian. We usually make a meat and she eats the salad and side dishes. I am not going to make a whole other meal for her and she doesn't expect it.
I don't expect people to do it for me either. I am not big on meat - particularly big hunks of it (steak, fajitas), so if I am having dinner at your house and you are serving something I don't like, I make do.
I had dinner at Ering's a couple of times before she realized I wasn't putting any meat in my tortillas - just veggies and toppings.
if it bothered me like it's bothering you, of course i wouldn't make something separate.....it wouldn't bother me so i would do it. otherwise, i wouldn't stress about it or give a ratsass that their kid had to eat beforehand or be hungry.
Mostly I just wanted to get the board moving a bit today.
I am making presentation books at my desk...BORING. Doesn't help when the boad is slow.
I would make and have made something for the adult(s) that is vegetarian, not big on spices etc. Would I ask for a special non-chocolate dessert as a guest, absolutely not. But I do it for my guests. Crazy self inflicted double standard I guess.
I feel like this falls under the "your house, your rules" clause where, although their preferences may be catered to at their house, at Ms.Harmony's house everyone eat's the same thing, etc.
The exception would be an allergy situation, in which, I would make a point to ensure I didn't include a dangerous ingredient in anything I served.
I agree with dana. If I know someone (adult or kid), doesn't like something or has a special diet, I will try to make something to accomodate.
If you are dealing with a picky kid and don't want me to cater to that, then tell me and I won't do it
As far as my kid wanting the other kid's food, the way I look at it is it one night. BUT I only have a 16 month old and he eats everything at this point so maybe I would feel differently if he were older/pickier.
As the parent of a pretty picky child, I agree with rayskit! Don't worry about making something else for the kids...especially if it's something your kids will eat. I encourage DD to try new things and appreciate being a guest for dinner and would never expect them to serve only what she likes (which varies anyway!). If she is hungry she will try what is offered.
This! Sometimes K doesn't like what we're having, and ends up probably still hungry at times, but has learned that she simply needs to eat what's offered if she wants to satisfy her hunger. I have to say, there are VERY few things she doesn't like since she's been exposed to so much from a very early age.
And I would never make a special meal for someone else's child (again, unless it's medical) for the exact reason you mentioned, Harmony....because my child would want that....and I'm not playing that game!
You might find that their kids would eat what is being served because YOUR kids are eating it.
When Micaela was in daycare... she ate all kinds of veggies that I could never get her to eat at home... Why? Because everyone else was, of course!
Not a chance in hell. We eat together ~once a month and have for a year.