Is it legit to veto this bachelor party?

Kate&Mark

One of M's childhood friends is getting married this summer. He asked M (and his brother) to bring down the gifts at church so we'll be going to the rehersal and all. It's OOT.

This guy and his close circle of friends all have amazing jobs and easily make double what we do. We'd been expecting some big/crazy bachelor party. M had bet it would be a weekend in Vegas and I had said I'd be fine with him doing that.

Well, he got the bachelor party plans last night: they're going to New Orleans for 5 NIGHTS! WTF!

He hasn't said whether he wants to go or not yet - and I'm pretty much hoping he realizes how rediculous it is and decides not to. This is legit to veto, though, right? I don't really want him spending all that money to go on vacation for nearly a week without me! Especially to a place we've talked about going together!

JuddandJessica

Five days is a lot and I honestly doubt most people invited could do that either. Even if they do have the money, that's a lot of time off work. I'd be willing to bet there will end up being one or two more "main nights". Maybe he can just go for that?

AlyciaandRich

I would not want dh to go either if it involved lots of drinking and partying one night yes but five! Dh wouldnt want me going either. 

yvdukana

I agree, 5 nights sounds excessive. A weekend is much more understandable, but 5 nights was basically our HM. I'm willing to bet, like someone else said, there will probably be 1 or 2 "main" nights of partying, typical bachelor party stuff, and the rest is just fun vacation. Maybe M can try to find out if that's happening and make it for those. I'd be upset too though if it were someplace we had talked about visiting together. 

DLpanda08

Totally legit veto.  A five night vacation in New Orleans is really excessive for a bachelor party even if you do have the money to spend. Taking that much time off of work to have a week long vacation with the boys is definitely not something I would be happy about.

NittanyLionLaura

Completely legit!

blueandgold749

Maybe M can say 'Hey, 5 nights is too much for me, but I can fly in for these 2 nights (or whatever) and then fly back out myself.  You guys have fun on the rest of the trip.' 

C_mo

5 days?? Who does that? I would say it's veto worthy. Are they having any one night they are doing their main bachelor things? If so I would think that would be more reasonable.

Mu BIL has his bachelor party at the lake on the weekend of our first anniversary and expected Lance to be there for all 3 days they were partying... He ended up going the first night and spent the rest of the weekend with me and it worked out well. 

alissa2128

I agree with the people who said maybe he could go for just a few days. While I would probably be upset with DH going to New Orleans w.out me (neither of us has ever been) I wouldn't want him to miss a good friends bachelor party, and I wouldn't want DH to be able to veto me going to someone's bachelorette party either. I say look into how much it would cost for him to go for just a couple of days and go from there.

Kate&Mark

Whew, no veto needed. It overlaps with the weekend-long CFA class he signed up for which means he can't go.

NittanyLionLaura

Glad that worked itself out!