Hugging

missmis99

I think I may have posted this a while ago, but I have an issue with hugging.  We were at my ILs last night to watch the game and this is where it is the biggest issue.  Everytime I see them, I have to give EVERYONE a hug hello and goodbye.  Even if I just saw them yesterday.  I did not hug when I grew up except on special moments.  This concept of routinely hugging seems to take away the specialness of a hug and just bothers me.  There is no good way not to hug someone though.  They just dive right in and hug you whether you want it or not.  I have an issue with this and just needed to vent. 

Are you a routine hugger?  Can you tell if someone doesn't want to be hugged?  Do people seem to be doing this more these days? 

Kathiiy

MissMis, I feel your pain.  All this hugging is not necessary.  I'm even worse, hugging anyone that isn't my DH weirds me out.  Plus I am left handed so always hug to the wrong side and smack into peoples faces.

 If you can find a good way to opt out of the hugging, apart from conveniently picking up something large and spiky, like a cactus, when the hugging starts, let me know.

 

 

 

lexiarein

I grew up in a very huggy family. DH's family is very huggy. Even though I've been around for a total of 7 years, there are some of them I still don't feel comfortable hugging. DH's uncle, by marriage is kinda strange and not a very affectionate person, so neither one of us is really sure if we're supposed to hug him or not. A few times, DH has gone in for a hug, and the uncle goes for a handshake and then they switched and it was very awkward for everyone involved. DH has an aunt (by marriage) who is the sweetest person, but when she hugs she kisses on the cheek. That really threw me at first. She kisses DH on the mouth when she hugs him, I'm glad she hasn't tried that with me cause I would be weirded out.

A trick I learned to avoid the whole situation is to have your hands full/be busy with something. Come in to the house carrying something. Say hello as you come through carrying whatever. That way, you said hello, but you were obviously not in a hugable state. When you go to leave, have DH say goodbye and do the hugs, while you are (taking your time) tying your shoes, or getting the coats or whatever. DH meets you by the door, then you say "goodbye everyone" and wave to anyone whose eye you catch. 

branz7

I love hugs :-(  I'd be so annoying to you guys.  

My friends and I always hug goodbye after a gtg is over, but we only sometimes hug hello.  Depends on the setting I think.

My family and DH's family are relatively affectionate too, but IMO it's not overkill.  I don't walk downstairs in the morning when we're staying at my in-laws and give my MIL a hug.  But when I'm leaving to go out somewhere, I usually do give a goodbye hug, even when I'll be seeing her that night.  My mom and sisters and I are very comfortable with each other too...but I think that just comes from being a household of all girls.

I dunno...hugs are cozy to me!  But don't worry I'll keep away from all of you girls!!! ;-) 

louieblue

I'm like branz, I'm a hugger.  I can't imagine having grown up in a family that didn't routinely hug.  My parents always hugged and kissed me goodnight and hugged me before I went to school in the morning.  My dad would give me a hug when he came home from work.  I hug friends and family I haven't seen in a while and there are a few coworkers that I hug on a regular basis.
There are some people I'd rather not hug of course, but honestly, a hug doesn't last more than a few seconds, so it won't kill me to touch said person.  I don't know anyone personally who is anti-hugging.

erincassidy06

I too am a hugger. I grew up in a hugging family so I still give my mom, dad, brother a hug goodbye and now that my Papa lives with my parents he gets pissed if you don't hug him before you leave.

DH's family are not huggers and when they do its a supper akward pat on the back hug. I think if your gonna hug you should just go for it!

e_jakiela

I am a hugged too. Both of my parents were very affectionate and always hugged me and my sister. Same with the family. DHs family is the same. But, even with all the hugging at home, I feel very weird when our CEO comes in and shakes hands with all the guys, but hugs all the women. It's nothing funky, he is not doing it sexually. He just does it. It's weird, because I wish he treated me like the guys and just shook hands.....

missmis99

I am not sure why I dislike hugs so much. I do think that in my family they were given on special moments. When we do hug it is really meaningful. All of this "routine hugging" seems to take away the specialness. 

MollySm

My family was not super huggy growing up.   My parents were affectionate, but just not very huggy.  Now I love hugging!  I think we are going to hug our kids all the time.