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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Moms: Not "giving in" to kids?
I know that I am guilty of giving in to my DD with everything and her requests are getting ridiculous and making dinnertime and bedtime horrible lately. I just have such a hard time with listening to her cry and scream for as long as she does...and she screams for me when she gets upset about anything because she is used to me caving in...I know I have to get over this, but was just looking for anyone who can relate.
Re: Moms: Not "giving in" to kids?
I found a very interesting book called "Beyond Time Out: From Chaos to Calm", Sounds like it might help.
Good luck!
She is testing her boundaries and every time you give in she knows that she can get what she wants if she just cries or screams long enough.
Yes, it's tough listening to them cry but you aren't doing yourself any favors giving in to her. You have to say no. She is looking to you to set limits.
I could go on and on about this but I'll stop there. We witnessed truly horrible behavior over the weekend from a friend's daughter so we've been talking about this a lot lately.
you're teaching her TO cry when she wants things... so you're going to hear a lot more crying over the years if you don't nip it in the bud.
I pick my battles... sometimes the things I "give in to" aren't IDEAL but if I can avoid a tantrum as I'm trying to get both kids fed and our dinner on the table, or get out the door for work, etc.. I evaluate whether it's really something worth fighting. I am in survival mode with a 2 year old and a 6 month old, lol.
That being said - if I am going to let her do something, I don't say "no" and then give in... if it's no, it's no - and if she cries, well, she'll get over it. I learned to walk away - giving more attention only feeds in to her and makes it worse. I won't say "no" 5 times and then be like "ok fine just stop crying" - that sends the message that if she whines/cries long enough every time that she'll get what she wants.
We're all dealing with it
)
This was me a few months ago and things were BAD. I stopped taking the "easy route" and pushing back more. And in the cases that I did "give in" I made it clear that I gave in because *I* decided to let him have xyz and not because *he* decided.
Within 2 weeks life was SO DIFFERENT. He still throws tantrums for crap but it isn't working and he give up quicker or I ignore it completely and he eventually calms down and is fine.
Its hard but I *thought* I was surviving and "in survival mode" and now that I'm on the other side of it I realize I was not surviving. i was muddling my way through things and hating every minute of it.