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marriage therapy?

Let me start off by saying that no, our marriage isn't in trouble. We're have a strong marriage, I just want one with more communication. Dh has a tendency of of shutting down or clamming up when we attempt to broach uncomfortable subjects for him. Some of which resurface time and time again.

Has anyone gone to a counselor or therapist to better their marriage? Some of the things I bring up, I would like him to see that I have some very valid points on, but most of all, I want him to learn how to tap into his feelings and understand why he has some of them, if that makes sense.

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Re: marriage therapy?

  • Yup we have. Immediatly after DH's accident, when he was still in the hospital, I told him I wanted us to see someone after he got home. I knew dealing with his PTSD would be hard, but I also knew us being together 24/7 would be a different situation (especially because previous to that he would be gone for months at a time). We did and it helped.

    Obviously you're not in the same situation. However, it set us up for being open to help communicating. Last year we started thinking it might be good to check in again. So now we go once a month to a counselor here. DH and I have different styles of communicating as well as different styles of affection. It's very helpful to know that you have a 3rd party to help you discuss things. And when we know we can bring it up at the next appointment it helps keep things balanced daily, instead of letting things build up or hang over our heads while one (or both) avoids hot topics.

    -Clare
    imageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker imageLilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • We wanted to, but never got around to it and it was pretty costly.  And so we decided to do some "self help" first and evaluate if it's better to be with a professional.

    I highly recommend The 5 Love Languages.  I got the audio version to listen in the car and we both listened to it.  It helped us a lot in understanding each other.  Why he's the way he is and why I'm the way I am. 

    DH also read The Secrets of Happily Married Men.  I didn't read it, but he has improved a lot for over a year now.  I honestly can't even remember the last time we had a fight. 

    Lisa. mommy to Emmy and Ally image
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