a friend's husband might be cheating... wwyd?

melissa0312

so i have a friend whose DH occasionally works with my sister. my sister has noticed that he's been flirting with her lately, and he's made some comments as to being unhappy in his marriage. he eluded recently to being with someone and then later sending pics of himself via text.

yesterday he accidently sent her a text asking what she was wearing, then told her it was a mistake. then asked if she was "sad that it wasn't intended for her. she could answer anyway because he bet she looked amazing".

i saw the texts.... his wife is a friend. wwyd???

houstonkdw

With your sister's "permission", I would tell the friend.  I say that you need to ask your sister first only because she has to work with the creep.  If your sister feels comfortable, I would also let HR know about his comments and texts to her.  That is inappropriate for the work place much less what he is doing to his wife.  Since this involves two people you care about (friend and sister) I would tell.  But I am nosy

Sweet_Thang

I am with houstonkdw.   And you your sister should really bring that up to HR as well; what was sent was inappropriate and if it made her uncomfortable, then it needs to be reported.   

halfpintaggie

Ditto what houstonkdw & sweet_thang said.

How sad for your friend

aprilprincess

ditto, but be ready to be the messenger who is shot. she may deny it or defend him but usually when the dust settles she'll come back around.

melissa0312

the problem... he works independently. my sister works for an extremely small company. there is no HR. she knows him because she ocassionally helps him out with his business on her own time (they are in the same profession).

i do know that she's decided to stop helping out.

Red_Dahlia

aprilprincess:

ditto, but be ready to be the messenger who is shot. she may deny it or defend him but usually when the dust settles she'll come back around.

ditto this. If your sister is ok with it, I would definitely tell your friend and show her the texts. I'm trying to think through how you would have that conversation with your friend - I wouldn't even know where to start.

E&RMommy

If I were in this girl's shoes, I would want to be told.  If your sister is ok, I would absolutely say something.  She deserves to know what kind of DB he is. 

04JaxBride

i would absolutely positively want to know if i was that wife.

if i found out down the line that you KNEW and kept it from me, i'd hate your guts!!!

ccc'swife

04JaxBride:

i would absolutely positively want to know if i was that wife.

if i found out down the line that you KNEW and kept it from me, i'd hate your guts!!!

Ditto.  I'd be all kinds of pissed off if a friend knew about it and didn't tell me.  Like one of the PPs said, I'd be prepared for her to "shoot the messenger", so to speak, just because you never know.  I personally wouldn't be mad at the person telling me, but she might react differently.

But absolutely, I would want to know. 

Nanner

I agree with the others.

And seriously, what kind of moron would hit on a woman who has a connection to his wife? And using text messaging, for crying out loud? Does he WANT to get caught?