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Trainwreck no. 2 vent
My longest known friend is someone that has been a train wreck from birth, it seems. Every relationship has been doomed from the start it seems. Back when I was a dumb young kid I thought everyone's relationships had these kind of problems. Therapy is really helping me see how unhealthy I used to be.
Currently, she is getting a divorce but planning a big expensive wedding without the consent of her boyfriend. Yep, he says "I am not even thinking about marriage for the next five years" and she is saying "Right, that is why I am planning it now!" when inside she is planning to ambush him into marriage and two babies by that five years. To make matters worse she told me this gem today: She and her ex decided to get a divorce six months and 3 days ago. She started dating her boyfriend exactly six months ago.
He has no job, he blames the economy and the fact that he can't drive until he pays his 5 grand court fees. He brings in 300/a month in under the table cash her family gives him to fix things around the house and 100/a month from his food stamps. She thinks this is the perfect situation because she has a high paying job with great benefits from the State. This way she makes all the money and he takes care of the babies. Expect that he doesn't want kids for the next six or seven years. She wants them before she is 28. Which given her age means she has three years to get there.
You would think with their conflicting views, she would just cut her losses, find some commitment hungry baby machine out there right? No, instead she is always trying to think of ways to have an "oopsy" baby without going as far as to poke holes in his condoms. She is looking up bizarre symptoms, like headaches, and connects them to someone's pregnancy, so she can say she has the same thing.
Her favorite show is 'I didn't know I was pregnant.' She tells me all the time "I hate to watch it because it scares me, but I feel I have to because this is exactly how everyone in my family gets pregnant." Mind you, she comes from one of those doesn't show or test positive until six months kind of families, but she has tested positive before at 1.5 months. She m/c early on though.
This is gonna end badly. She is either going to trap him into marriage and kids before he is ready (cue in the resentment), she is going to end up pregnant and alone, or left at the altar with a huge loan to pay. That's right she is going to get a loan to pay for the wedding. She plans on using the house she is planning in the three months before her lease is up as equity. She really has no idea about money but she does have family that are semi-rich and bail her out all the time. It enables her to do one dumb thing after another. I doubt this far on if she is ever going to learn how to be a healthy adult.
Re: Trainwreck no. 2 vent
Anybody else's head taking a nice long swim at this point?
Mine is.
Holy crap...what kind of a decent woman plans a wedding while she is married to somebody else??
Yeah, I found this out when she asked what I had planned about my wedding yet. She has so many issues, I don't know if she will ever get them taken care of. She is so crazy, I talk to her just to laugh at how deep in fantasy land she is. If I ever suggest she slow her roll she asks "Why not?" I explain what is wrong with what she is doing and she makes up reasons that made her madness a good thing. Now I just enjoy the ride and keep her out of my business.
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