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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: Speaking of Smoking....clicky poll
I love smoking. If it didn't have a lingering smell on clothes I'd still do it when I am alone. I smoked regularly through college, cut back when I started working (smoke at happy hour, on longer drives), I stopped during fertility treatments and then resumed smoking one or two cigarettes on my way home from work every day. I stopped when we got our daughter. There is no way I could be able to smoke as I am her primary caregiver and would smell like it.
I feel bad for smokers. I had no choice but to quit but it's not easy. Having other people go on and on about how filthy it isn't doesn't help either. All smokers know that it's a bad habit. The only reason I don't still have a cigarette after she goes to bed is because my husband would flip out.
I am also super judgmental about it. It's a character flaw I suppose but I like it
Do we share the same life? I could have written this word for word (minus the part about sister since I am an only child)!! I also voted never but my explanation is the pretty much the same as Colleen's.
Mommy to Stephanie Lena - 2.13.07 and Evan Ralph - 9.23.10
Angel Baby (m/c at 9 weeks) - 1.2.09
Christmas Card Picture - 2011
(aka: the only picture I could get of them together that was not blurry and had them both sitting still!)
Click here for My Bio
The Stephanie Song...click here to listen!
I totally get that quitting isn't just putting the suckers down. Out of six kids in my family, half smoked, half didn't. All of my sibs have quit except one. It was really, painfully hard for my other two sibs to quit-- and they're the hardest on the one that still smokes! I feel for my sister-- I know she wants to quit in theory. In practice, I know it's not that simple. Addiction sucks. Period.
haha, Gabbs!! Was it a clove in college, too? They smell delicious. If they tasted as good as they smell, I would have totally been done for.
I agree with this. There are times when I really miss smoking. But I hate the smell and the way it makes me feel.
I agree with the other poster about addiction too, it does suck!
Became a Mrs. on 4/29/06 and a Mommy on 12/5/08
I get pissy too. I get mad when I go to the mall and walk my baby through a cloud of smoke. Having been on the other end, I don't think people realize how badly the smell carries over and how far of a reach it has.
Ugh but put a beer to my lips and I'd pay anything for a cigarette.
i get its a hard addiction to quit and I get that you're an adult so you can choose what you do, so I dont judge that aspect. BUT I HATE HATE and yes Judge when people smoke in the car with their kid. I sit in traffic and it bugs me to no end! I want it to be illegal!! Knowing what we know about cigarettes and 2nd hand smoke, I can't believe someone would still subject their kid to second hand smoke, especially in a closed space like a car or van. And cracking the window does nothing! Like PP said, I dont think people realize how much smell is on their kid and how much smoke they are still breathing in!
I have so many students that smell of it and worse off, many of them have bad allergies, always have sinus issues, and are clearly allergic to it. It definitely affects their health.
THIS THIS THIS.
My mom has smoked for the better part of my life. She's quit a few times but always goes back to it. I started casually smoking my senior year of HS. One day, my freshman year of college I made a comment about her quitting and she told me I wasn't allowed to comment anymore since I was doing it too. I told her I could quit whenever I wanted. And I did, right then. I need to be REALLY drunk to take a drag off of one. And that is a rare occasion, lol. It wasn't until I moved into my own house away from ANYONE who smoked that I really started to notice the smell. Now, I HATE when my sister or mom come over cause the reek and going to their house stinks too.
With that said, you can comment, judge, make fun and be rude all you want...a smoker won't quit until they are ready. And there's still no guarantee they won't go back to it. Addiction is addiction.
My one sister quit when her daughter came home crying because someone told her that she smelled like smoke. I do agree that smoking with kids in the car isn't ok. I don't want my kids in my smoker sister's car-- not because she'd smoke with them in it, but because of the reek that emanates from the car. I think she gets it, too, but it's hard sometimes to set those boundaries with loved ones. I don't want her to feel like an a-hole because she smokes, but I need to protect my kids, too. It's not easy.
Totally didn't see this attitude last week when Whitney Houston died. I think you were her biggest critic on the board last week, actually, even though she obviously suffered from addiction.
BFP #2: 11/16/11: M/C at 7 weeks
BFP #3: 03/24/12: C/P 03/28/12
BFP #4: 04/26/12: please be our baby
OMG, i LOVED LOVED LOVED smoking. like, in loved with it. could not love it more than i did.
walking through a cloud of smoke with my kids doesn't bother me, TBH. it's not my favorite hobby or anything but i figure i have more sedinatry smoke in my house when i make a roast than these kids get in their lungs from the .04 seconds they spend walking through it to get into the mall.
I was going to say, I agree with Turtle, you can't make someone want to end an addiction. They have to want to and be willing to work at it.
When a smoker dies of lung cancer or other disease's linked to smoking I feel just as sad as when a drug user dies in their bath tub. Again, addiction is addiction. The user knows of the risk and so while it is sad that they have lost their life, they lost it at their own hand. I didn't make fun of Whitney Houston...I just called a spade a spade. It's not shocking to me when a known, self admitted drug user dies anymore than when a known smoker dies of emphysema. You make think that's cold or judgmental, I prefer to see it as realistic.
When a smoker dies of lung cancer or other disease's linked to smoking I feel just as sad as when a drug user dies in their bath tub. Again, addiction is addiction. The user knows of the risk and so while it is sad that they have lost their life, they lost it at their own hand. I didn't make fun of Whitney Houston...I just called a spade a spade. It's not shocking to me when a known, self admitted drug user dies anymore than when a known smoker dies of emphysema. You make think that's cold or judgmental, I prefer to see it as realistic.
Again, I have to agree with Turtle. It's sad when any addict dies, because, IMHO, they had a hand in ending their life. I understand they didn't flat out take their lives, but they knew their behavior was putting them at risk and continued to do so. In Whitney's case, she had a history and made no secret of her drug use...she had the money and means to get better...she just didn't.
I think I'd feel differently if it was quickly walking through it and no other exposure. Since moving to the city we've had an issue where people will stand in front of businesses below our apartment (in 2 different buildings) and smoke and my apartment will stink the entire time they stand around smoking. I'm also allergic so this is a huge problem (and closing the window isn't an option since the heat's too high).
The Journey of Me
Vacation, 2011
I smoked on and off from 13-30. I was always a social smoker. At times I smoked enough that one would think I should've been addicted but I never was. When I met mh he was grossed out by it. Then he said I could move in with him if I quit. I quit that day. My desire to move on up like Weezie was much stronger than my desire to keep smoking.
I know how hard it is for some people to quit so I'm not making light of it. I was just one of those lucky ones that it wasn't difficult. Every once in a while watching the jersey shore cast smoke while drinking or on the boardwalk, I'll miss it, but the smell IRL makes me want to hurl
i have literally never smoked - anything- never one drag. I can't STAND smoking and never had a desire to try pot (it was around me all the time... i just had no desire).