New Jersey Nesties
kmslwsmrs
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Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Totally just ruined the surprise of not knowing the sex of the baby at 36 frigging weeks...
I'm so so so so upset. I didn't find out with either one of my kids, and had no intention of finding out with this one....was just at an ultrasound and was looking at the screen with all the measurements (at the end of the ultrasound) that I've looked at a million times. I guess I just never realized the sex was on there...and there it was. I just sat there and started crying...at that point I should have just asked them to verify it because now I'm wondering if what I saw was even right, but I was so upset I just got up and left. If I wanted to know what it was, I would have found out 20 weeks ago...I'm so sad!!!
Re: Totally just ruined the surprise of not knowing the sex of the baby at 36 frigging weeks...
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you might be wrong my dear. don't let it bother you like liz said be happy everything is ok. and will this change how much you love that baby? of COURSE not? i am not trying to belittle your feelings in anyway. because i remember quite well the things that would upset me when i was pregnant. but my dear you could be wrong.
another nestie on here SWORE her baby was a girl based on what the tech or the dr said. and he was in fact ALL boy.
this
When I went for my 20w u/s I was hellbent on not finding out. Then my husband grabbed my arm and said, "Oh my god, i think I just saw a penis!" So, we found out sooner than planned because it was either find out, or hear my husband talk about mini penises for the next 20 weeks. Was I disappointed to know? Yes. But what matters is that the baby is coming, s/he's healthy, and you're about to expand your family!
Ditto Liz. You're having a baby. This is exciting whenever you find out the sex of the baby.
I won't pretend to understand the Team Green mentality, especially those who are hell-bent on waiting until the delivery room to find out, but to each their own. It just bothers me that you're letting this potential (and I do mean potential - you have NO way of knowing if what you saw is accurate because you didn't ask for confirmation) reveal upset you. I know you're hormonal but please try to remember this is a HAPPY time.
Agreed. I would give anything to be in your position!
OH, I'm so sorry. I was team green with both of my kids so I understand. I would have felt the same way, sad and disappointed. You have every right to feel this way and don't let anyone tell you differently.
I know that you'll be sad and disappointed for a little while, but then you'll back to the happy anticipation of your beautiful new baby.
i have to agree! please don't let this get you down!
I feel for you.... I had a similar thing happen to me with my third. I didn't find out with my girls and as tempting as it was to find out with our third and last child, we decided not too.
More than 1/2 through my pregnancy the nurse at my OB's office was doing a quick ultrasound to check the growth and was pointing out different body parts and then she said "and there's the penis!!!" - my heart sank, not b/c i was not happy i was having a boy after having 2 girls but b/c i wanted it to be a SURPRISE!!
My husband was not with me, and I called him and told him, I was very emotional.... he was shocked b/c he thought it was a girl!!! When we had an ultrasound a few weeks prior with our maternal/fetal medicine dr. the US screen said "female".... he wasn't sure if it meant for me or the child.
Well, at that point I didn't know what to think, didn't ask the dr. to confirm on way or the other and didn't say anything to family. Our child was born and it was indeed a boy...
So, I understand...... We were bummed out b/c of the way we found out, not b/c I was not happy with what we were having...
This kind of makes it sound like you're back to not knowing?!? so don't ask the OB, concede to not being 100% sure & go back to waiting to be surprised on delivery day
but you don't know! before you had a 50/50 shot for each sex. now you saw a word, which could either be the automatic choice unless selected, something to do with the machine itself (male and female are terms for lots of things), something to do with YOUR sex, or many other things. The sex is not relevant information regarding the health of your baby. It's not recorded unless they must know it for a specific problem. A lot of places don't even scan the genitals at all unless you ask to know the gender. With my 1st baby, we waited the while ultrasound, then finally were like "well, what are we having?" at the end, and the girl was like "oh i don't look unless you ask, let me try and find out"
So even if it IS right, it could be a coincidence and not because you actually "found out" ya know? You know nothing
These are my thoughts too (though I wanted to know my baby's sex at my 20w u/s). Please don't let this ruin the rest of your pregnancy. Even if you DO know your baby's sex and it isn't a surprise, please get past the disappointment of not having the big surprise moment and enjoy the last few weeks.
Oh Kristy I know how you feel! The same thing happened to me at my 37 week US. I told the tech (like i always do) that i didn't want to know. she told me to look away when she checked down below and then when we were talking she was referring to the baby and said "Him I mean it". It was the way she corrected herself so quickly I just knew!!! I was SOOOO upset. I found out the gender with G and was hell bent on being surprised this time.
Everyone on here told me not to be so sure and even my OB said the same thing! so i put it out of my mind and you know what I was still surprised even though I did have a boy!
In the end i think it was a good thing, because i was convinced i was having a girl and it forced me before delivery to accept having a boy. I wanted a girl so i could give my grandmother a namesake, and i really thought i was having one. having the tech slip forced me to come to grips with the fact that it might be a boy and that would mean i couldn't name it after her. I'm fine with it now and wouldn't have it any other way!! but i think if she didn't slip, i would have been totally shocked at delivery where as it was more of a happy surprise. i hope that makes sense.
no one is suggesting that you don't appreciate everything you're going through right now...all we're saying is don't let it upset the last few weeks...every emotion you're feeling is totally and completely fine...just push yourself through it and get back to that it could be it couldn't be phase...i think a lot of ladies here have shown that you may not have seen what you think you saw...so hopefully their experiences have you off kilter enough that you really don't know!
i know how you feel! i think i was 32 w when i was sent to the hospital for monitoring because of my bp. they did an u/s and the tech said 'she' -- we didn't want to know the sex and i was so pissed to think that was how i was going to find out. i asked my OB later that day when she came to check on me when i was admitted overnight and she said that the techs just choose a pronoun and go with it. my son was born less than 4 week s later -- i'll admit that it made me second guess our girl name and i drove myself (and my husband) crazy for a week looking for more girl names that we could agree on! LOL
i hope you are still surprised in a few weeks!!
I was Team Green so I completely understand the feeling of being disappointed. I was soooo careful at every ultrasound not to look and to tell the tech to watch her use of pronouns. I did ask if there was any risk of my Ob slipping up and she said there is no place where they put the actual sex of the baby- it only says "normal anatomy". I don't know if that's true for all docs, but that put my mind at ease.
If you really don't want to know, I wouldn't ask. There is the chance that you misread something (unless it specifically said "sex of fetus").
Mine said the same!
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Well, this won't be a popular post but i think your feelings are justified. All day people vent about silly little things here. It's why I enjoy checking in and see what's going on with other women (to know I'm not alone!!!). The minute you vent about pregnancy, you get the "just be grateful" line. I have no doubt you are grateful for your children. But (if I remember correctly) this is a planned c-section and, quite frankly, there isn't much exciting NEW stuff to look forward too . You know what to expect (spinal, getting cut open, sewn back together, recovery). I totally understand how not knowing the sex of your baby is one thing that will really make the day special. I was team green for all my kids. But with #3, I told the u/s tech we didn't want to know. She didn't mention she was hovering around the genitals and I really wanted to say, "that's a penis, isn't it?" but I didn't. I went for an u/s at 37 weeks to turn my little guy and the tech asked if I knew the sex. I told her I didn't (since i never confirmed). I figured he'd be too big at this point anyway. She stuck the wand on my belly and the penis was clear as day. I chose not to say anything ahead of time even though I was 95% certain I was cooking a boy. At least I got to announce the sex to everyone (i had the doctor hold him over the curtain so I could see the sex and announce it).
Anyway, I'm sorry the surprise of the day appears to have been ruined.
I don't think it would even say the sex on the ultrasound. It is not something they check for or really care too much about.
I had bloodwork done for chromosomal testing and my doctor asked me if I wanted to know the sex. I was shocked that he could tell and later found out that he couldn't. That it was MY sex that he was looking at. And he was a doctor.
I doubt what you saw was the sex, especially if it said female.