We got into the stupidest fight right before bed last night and she went and laid down in the kids' room (they were at their dads) and never came to bed. She said this morning that she just fell asleep and meant to come in later but never woke up. we have never done that before, slept in separate bedrooms...it was not fun.
It just seems like we have no time together, and the time we do have together we just nitpick at each other and are really grouchy. We don't have any days off together, and between work, school and kids, there is zero free time. Anyone have any advice on how to spend good quality time together where we're not grumpy with one another? thanks....
Re: slept alone last night....
This is so ironic that you posted this, because Julie and I are int he same place we never see each other, and when we do all we do is nitpick. It's frustrating b/c neither of us enjoy it. So last night we talked, no arguing talking.
We decided that the nights we do have together we will eat togheter at the table. So we can have time to catch up.
We will make it a point to kiss the other right when we get home, just a way to say 'I missed you'
We've decided that we will not bring our work issues home. That stress needs to be left at the door, and if we are stressed we will ask for help.
We will also take Raphael on 2 walks a week together.
And lastly one weekend day we will spend together with no other distractions. Because that is the ONLY time we really have. This weekend we are taking a trip to the coast.
We are both so caught up in everything else that we were loosing touch w/ each other, and I think this will help us get more in sync w/ each other.
I feel neglected bc I have work and school and when I get home I have homework. Danielle says she doesn't want to sit around and watch me do homework so she goes to the bar with friends. Even when we are home together, we are not together. We recently had a big blowout about this and though I feel better, I don't feel that we resolved anything.
Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. We made a rule that either we both have to be in bed, or we both have to be out of bed. The guest room is off limits, so it's either make up enough to sleep together in bed, or sleep on the couch (1 person on each couch). Oddly enough, that rule makes us work really hard to resolve things (or agree to table them) before bed. We have yet to actually take the couch option.
Do you know why you are nitpicking each other? Is there a way to express what you need so that it doesn't come out in nitpicking? When we're like that, we stop and take 5 minutes to each make a list of "what I need from you right now" and then we talk through our lists, after which they get posted on the fridge. This exercise, silly as it sounds, can really help us get back on track.
IUI #3 gave us the best 2nd anniv. gift ever: 2 babies! (born 03/09/10)
Peanut and Little Man are getting so big! 2 years old already!
finally blogging again at This Will Be: An Adventure