Married Life
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Do you/have you ever worked with a significant other?
Did you have to keep it hidden due to company policy? Did it effect your romantic relationship at all?
The post about the girl who felt smothered by her controlling boyfriend had me thinking about how common or uncommon it is to work with a boyfriend/spouse/whatever.
I met my boyfriend at work and we still work together. There is no company policy against it. We don't work directly together, but I am the office administrator, so I do have to interact with every employee on some level. It works fine for us and doesn't effect our relationship - I think it helps that we have an unspoken rule to keep work talk to a minimum at home.
Re: Do you/have you ever worked with a significant other?
No.
In my last job, I worked with a husband and wife. And they were far from professional about it. They both shared offices with other people and would battle it out over food/snacks while their office mate was there. The spouse would tag along, uninvited, to any "free" lunch for the other's department. And they took 1.5 to 2 hour lunches every day.
They also called each other, on speaker phone, when their offices were next door to each other.
where I used to work, quite a few couples came out of that job! Off the top of my head, I can count 10. A few worked directly together, most didn't. I think as long as there was no boss/subordinate roles going on, there wasn't an issue.
I don't know if I could or not. I mean, DH and I could - we're both professional and mature enough to make it work fine. But I'd want some kind of seperation. As you said, keep work talk at home to a minimum. I'd want to have my own friends at work and NOT do lunch w/ him every day.
We'd need some breathing room both at work and at home.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I met my husband at work.
We worked on the same project in London but he was in Phase III on the IT side and I was in Phase IV on the Business Analyst side. So we didn't really work together much at all.
It got a bit awkward when I decided that love trumped career and they had to fire me since I wasn't going to return to the U.S.
I had a corporate flat very close to the office and we had more than a few nooners back then, lol.
Yeah that's right my name's Yauch!
Gross!
We work in the same building but at different companies. That works well because we have some separation but we can still run up or down and have lunch together if we want to. We should carpool more than we do but differing schedules make that hard most days.
We met in college, and worked in the same lab for one summer (we'd been dating for around 1.5 years at that point. We broke up soon thereafter. Too much time in close quarters was no good.
The break up only lasted a month after school started, and we had some breathing room from each other. There's no way I could ever work with him now, for a number of reasons.
Sorry, the Christmas party part made me laugh! But in all seriousness, we started out the same way (except no Christmas party). It started off as a sex-thing and after a few months, it got serious and no one gave a damn.
We never drive in together and besides getting each other coffee in the morning, I think we're pretty mature and professional about it. We work in an environment where people call you out on it. I also think it helps that my boss dated one of our project manager for 15 years and they were way less than professional about it (and their break up) at times. We'll always look more professional in comparison, hah!
We do. Sometimes I get really sick of his assface, and I tell him so.
We met at work. And had a two year relationship before anyone knew we were together.
lol. Yes. It was fun, THEN. If we worked together now I'd want to smash his face in 87% of the time (instead of only 43%).
Yeah that's right my name's Yauch!
we met at work, we never really talked and had a mutual friend, but during the course of when we knew each other at first, both of us were married...he got divorced over 2 years ago, i got divorced last June. and it was pure luck that we were on travel together and found out how great we are together and have been together since end of May last year (yes he was only part of the reason for my divorce which was a long time coming).
he is my lead design engineer on one of my programs, we work next door, drive in together...we never have issues with our personal life interfering with work or vice versa...and there is no company policy against it since neither of us is in a supervisory role and we work in different branches and our buildings are next door to each other. He is in Crew Serve Weapons, and I am in Weapons Technology.
I know people who were like this- constant PDA, intruding into meetings to check something with their spouse, etc. It got to the point that clients were complaining to their managers, and one of them was moved to a different office in the same area.
DH and I work at the same place, but it's huge and have very little overlap. He does work on a project with some others from my office, but I'm more likely to take their side than his when they disagree, lol. When we were in the same building we did have lunch together most days (only 30-40 min though!), but since he moved to a different building on campus it's more like once, maaaybe twice a week.
The big plus is commuting together. It's where we have most of our responsible-adult conversations, since DD makes trying to talk about mortgages and trips pretty much impossible once we get home, and we're both nearly brain-dead in the evenings.
We actually are working together now, he's like 15 feet from me at his desk LOL
He's been with the company for about 2 years and I just started in October. He's the customer service manager and I'm the marketing manager. It works well, we carpool together because we work the same days/times.
Sometimes it can get overwhelming being around each other 24/7, but we just take some time apart in the evening and weekends to do our own thing for a bit.
H and I both worked for his family company for several years. I hated working there, H was the bright spot in my day. we didn't quite share a cubicle, but it was close. He used to throw rubber bands and pencils at me and we'd eat lunch together and send each other emails from ten feet away. It was fun times.
I'd do it again, but only if we had our own business. I think it would be weird in our dynamic if we had to work together for strangers (as opposed to working for family).
I met my college boyfriend (not my H) at work. We worked at a grocery store- he was the manager and I was a cashier. I'm not sure that it affected our romantic relationship since we worked together from the start, but it definitely affected us at work. I don't think there was a policy against it, but it did affect how I did my job and I'm sure I got unfair advantages because he was my BF.
Once I was ringing up this little old lady and helped to get her groceries all packed up how she wanted them and into her cart, and after she left, I realized she hadn't paid. Oops. Thankfully my BF was working, so I just called him came over and cleared it out or whatever so it didn't show a deficit on my drawer later. It was like $150 worth of groceries... yeah I was kind of a crappy cashier, LOL.
But honestly, at the time, I loved it. It was fun seeing him at work and everyone in the store knew we were dating, so people were probably nicer to me than they had to be. The only awkward moment I can remember was when one of the other managers had a BBQ and invited the other managers and their SOs. We went and I got a little (ok a LOT) tipsy, then had a huge hangover the next morning and had to go to work, and they all knew why I was hungover.
1/12 - Clomid + IUI = BFP, natural m/c
4/12 - surprise BFP!, missed m/c = D&C at 6 weeks
We did at one job, and now I work with him as a volunteer (he volunteers, I'm paid).
It's fine until everyone expects us to communicate about stuff. Then we fail.
I never encountered a problem like this, but I think also I answered previously to this topic...
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