Relationships
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I got the last two (worried grandma)
I'm not sure how much I missed though
Re: I got the last two (worried grandma)
Re: Worried my daughter's In - laws will control their lives
You keep saying "the kids" like you are refering to children. These are adults. I know you mean it as an endearment, but I think you see them as small children in need of protection.
They aren't. Your daughter isn't.
If she chooses to be a doormat to her MIL, you can encourage her to be her own person. But you can't be smarter than she is. And I'm sorry, SHE bought a condo with a crappy inspection. As an adult. It was a stupid mistake. Stop acting like she is a victim. She's not.
Start expecting her to act like a grown-up and maybe she will be one. This "poor daughter" routine is very destructive. For both of you.
You remind me of my mom. That's not a compliment.
I believe I am the daughter in this story. It's a long story of how I found this post but suffice to say one of my friends visits this site regularly and recognized the details of my life and pointed me to it. I feel like I need to come on here and clear a couple or a lot of things up.
First of all I love my parents very much and that will never change because family is family. But in regards to our wedding, it may have sounded as if my inlaws only paid for a few things, limo, invitations, etc. The limo however was a stretch and in the back were several beverages including sparkling cider and cheese plate. I have very warm memories of sitting there with my fiance now husband and riding, and being so excited to be man and wife. So yes it was not a large contribution but it is not always the dollar value that determines how important it is to the bride/daughter and son/groom.
Also I agree to a certain extent that we should not have bought and moved into the villa but I had to take into account the wishes and beliefs of my hubby and his family and they were very strongly feeling that this was the right choice. And as was said I was tired of being up in the air and wanted to live somewhere permanent. The house has a lot of problems but I don't want people to come here and read this and think that our baby is going to live in a mess. The rats are gone. I saw something a few weeks ago that could have been a dropping but I haven't seen anything else since so it was probably a one-off feces that one tends to see in any house in an area where rats can live.
As for the baby gifts issues it is true that my mother inlaw said she bought a lot of items and the whole trip became very tense. I do not care who buys what. I just want my baby to have enough clothes and bibs and such. I don't think that is wrong. I have alot more to say about the furniture and the options for growing with the child but maybe I will talk that through in another post. Right now I just wanted to put out there that I love my family very much but I have to find a way to work my hubby and his parents into many aspects of my life. Even though we are already 26 and have several years of experience being in a marriage it is a work in progress like any relationship. I like that my mother wears the friend hat and the mother hat and I try to wear both the daughter hat and the friend hat, but sometimes it's hard to know which hat I should wear to match her hat.
Lastly for now I think it's important to note that I AM independent and take care of my household and our life but it's always comforting and helpful when our parents will help out such as with financial assistance.At noisy_penguin I don't think people should talk about others as "those Turks" in this day and age.
Request my alliance now!Votes for sale!
I have no idea what my point was anymore.