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NFBR - invitation wording help please

Our son's baptism is coming up soon and I'm getting the invitations ready - it's just family that we are inviting but I'm stuck on how to word the invite.  There are lines for the date, location, time, etc. and then there is a blank line at the bottom.  I can either use it to ask for RSVP and I was also thinking of putting something about lunch after.  But we aren't planning on hosting the lunch (paying) but just going out to eat like we always do after church but we want everyone to know they are welcome to join us, but we don't really want to pay for lunch for everyone - it will be a minimum of 20 people. 

Is there a way to word that or should I just use it to ask for RSVPs so we know how many pews we need and then send a follow up email (this is immediate family) saying something like "we will be going to lunch to celebrate the baptism and you are welcome to join us - let me know if you are coming and how many so I can prepare the restaurant".  I don't know that any of them would expect us to pay but I don't want it to be awkward when they bring the bill either. 

For what it's worth, when H's sister had her daughters christened, we all went to eat afterwards and they hosted it - but H and his dad both gave them money towards the bill.  Thanks for any input.

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Re: NFBR - invitation wording help please

  • I don't know, I feel like this is one of those things you should host.  People will most likely be giving gifts, I don't think you should have them pay for their meal too.

    To keep costs down, can you have it at your house?  Maybe prepare a lasagna ahead of time and just throw it in the oven when you get back.  Then serve it with a salad and rolls and have cake for dessert.  

    While the lasagna is cooking, just make sure to have a few snacks - veggie tray, cheese and crackers, deviled eggs (if you like those).

    That should be easy to prepare and low cost.

  • I agree with SA....I think that it's kind of awkward to invite that large of a group to an event and then expect them to pay for their own meal.  I can't think of a way to word that without it sounding weird.  I would do something simple at home...you can easily host something that won't cost a lot of money.    
  • I agree...IMO, you should host *something* for those attending a baptism/christening/naming.  Even if it's just cheese and crackers/veggies and dip, cake, and punch.  Your guests are taking time out of their day to witness and celebrate this occasion with you, and will likely give your DC a gift.  There should be at least a small reception afterward so you can greet and thank them.

    Then if you want to go to lunch as a family, do so.  I'd tell my parents, sister, ILs that they're welcome to come but it would sort of be a given in my family that they'd pay their own way in that situation, so they'd know. If that isn't the case with your family you either have to make it clear, be prepared to pay, or just not tell them about lunch in the first place.

  • We might have a gathering at our house, or we might just go to lunch afterwards.  I hope I didn't come across as cheap, I'm just not working right now and I'm contract work so I'm trying to be budget conscious.  Thanks for the replies! 
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