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In lieu of flowers, but different
Hi all- I need some suggestions. VERY long story, but my BFF who lives eight hours away has 2 year-old twins. She 34 year old husband was diagnosed with liver cancer a little over two years ago and then recently her FIL, who helped with daycare for the twins, was suddenly diagnose with cancer as well.
FIL passed yesterday and her husband is not supposed to make it more than a year. They plan to take one last family vacation to Disney World this May. I want to send something to them due to FIL passing. I think she would feel that flowers were a waste. I would love to send them money or a gift because they are struggling right now.
What are some ideas? I was thinking simply cash, maybe 2 savings bonds ( I know nothing about this) for the twins, gift cards for thier Disney vacation :in memory" of their grandpa? Any other ideas?
Re: In lieu of flowers, but different
I am so sorry for your friend.
If they are struggling, I think gift cards would be the best. I would get the kind that are basically cash on a card, because if money is tight right now, they can use it for groceries or something fun or on their vacation. They'll have more options.
I think cash is fine. Or if you're for sure they are going to Disney, you can buy them " adventures" like backstage tours or swimming with dolphins etc.
We had a friend in a similar situation; in fact father and son died within a week and were honored at a joint funeral.
When it became clear our friend was terminal, a bunch of our scout and cub groups were able to donate air and hotel points to send him to Mexico. Those who didn't have points, gave cash. We were able to fund a trip for 5. If you know people who travel for business maybe you could be the point person on this.
This has come up before. Visa gift cards usually have fees associated with them, including startup and inactivity fees. Personally, I would go the gift-card route, but maybe with chain restaurant or grocery stores instead. I have seen AmEx gift cards that have a $3 startup fee and they say right on them no additional fees, but I still would go with a no-fee, no- or distant-expiration gift card instead.
I do love the idea of "remembering" their Grandpa on the Disney trip, though. Maybe Grandpa's favorite restaurant was Olive Garden or something.
Your friend has a long and rocky road ahead. Blessings to her and her family. And you.
Dido what Mixedberry said.
You dont want her to have to pay any fees on the money you give her.
For assistance, and being so far away, I say get her a ton of gift cards to things like restaurants, or local grocery chains, cash...
A family members spouse committed suicide about a year ago, they had a young toddler...we sent $100.00 to assist with anything that we thought he would need during that time.