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Insecurities...how do you handle it?
I've worked a lot on myself in the past couple years and especially in the last year and a half since I left XH. I have more confidence in myself that I have ever had and I know I deserve a good guy.
Here's my issue. I had a quarterly review at work yesterday. It didn't necessarily go bad, but there are key items that I need to work on - most of them being more detailed and not letting little things slide. I talked about some of this with D (we work for the same company) and he gave me a lot of great ideas. The problem is he is very much type A personality and he makes it seem so simple the things I need to do. This personality is actually one of his features that I love about him. And, I used to have very type A traits as well, but during my relationship with XH, I lost a lot of it just so I could stay sane, not to mention I was extremely burnt out in life (he was very lazy and to keep things taken care of it all fell on me).
After we talked yesterday, I was left feeling very insecure/vulnerable. Most of it is really because I'm harder on myself than I probably should be, but with my not so stellar review at work, its really getting to me. Of course as dumb as it is, I'm now thinking because of that "What if he doesn't like me because of these things I struggle with at work?" or just not being as type A as he is.
Its been a really long time since my insecurities have shown up. And I know its because I tend to struggle with remembering I deserve someone awesome and that I'm good enough. I know we are fine, I just don't know what to do to shake this feeling of being so insecure!
And of course, I don't need to go to him with all this because I don't know if I'm ready for him to see that I'm really crazy 
Re: Insecurities...how do you handle it?
I think it's good to try to work through some things on your own because you recognize that what you're feeling isn't stemming from something D's done or created.
I know that I do something similar with my girlfriends IRL when I feel insecure. I also remind myself of all the things I have going for me and why I'm great.
As far as the performance assessment at work, try to keep it all in perspective. There are certain things that they must point out about you, but just use it as motivation and not to make yourself wrong for things. I always get marked down on my reviews for not recognizing or catching details. It's a reminder to me to slow down. Try thinking of new systems you can put into place that will help you with details. I keep a notepad on my desk and write down ANYTHING I can think of so I can get it into the system, onto my Outlook calendar, etc. I usually put several systems in place to remind myself of one thing.
You sound like my twin! You are not alone and I too, get point out at my employment to work on my attention to details. I get really hard on myself but I literally have to talk myself out of the down feeling and just say out loud "It is a new day".
Instead of thinking of your performance review as pointing out your flaws, think of it as love notes. Your manager points things out for you to work on to make you better and improved and you are still there.
I think it is more of how we respond to things and try not to self-judge as we can be our own worst enemies. You do have a lot of things going for you and people around you care enough to check-in with you.
Did your work eval mention the good things you do too? If you are like me you want to do so well, that you harp on the negative and tend to forget all the good things. It wouldnt be an eval if they told you all you were doing was perfect and you didnt need to improve on anything
. I totally understand where you are coming from though. When I left my EXH I had been completely broken down,and have had to "rebuild" myself. But alot of that has been through challenging myself and doing things alone, that i thought I could never do. You may be forgetting all the great things you do, and just need to be reminded. Your close girlfriends are the ones who can remind you of that 
Take this as one day, and come up with the plan of how you will tackle the things you need to work on, one at a time and make tomorrow be the day you start over, so to speak.
If this man doesnt like you anymore because of your work issues, then he is not much of a man. But Im sure he will understand everyone has work issues from time to time. Maybe you need to go running or go do some hard core aerobics (or exercise) and remind yourself that you can kick butt
. It can be empowering to feel strong physically, which will help get back that emotional strength too.
Thanks for the kind words ladies!
achase - you sound like D
I'm horrible about writing things down! I've been very fortunate that I have a pretty good memory and usually get everything done without doing that. And, I'm more frustrated because of the nature of my position - I have to use probably a quarter of my time documenting what I'm doing so people know I'm working. If I could just work during that time, I would be much more productive! I'm really being hard headed and haven't decided to give in yet 
heavenly - I really need to remember that my boss really is trying to help me grow in my career and it is his job to tell me what I need to work on.
bluebayou - there were actually several positives he mentioned, I usually just focus on what I need to fix. And thanks for saying that if he didn't like me because of this that he's not much of a man...wording it that way really brought out how ridiculous that part sounds...its truly irrational thinking on my part! And to make yesterday even better...we went cycling last night - planned on riding for 1 1/2 hours or so - I had a flat, so we only got a 25 minute workout in before it got dark...I was so planning on killing myself out there to get out some of this stress and it backfired! Good news though - I'm leaving work early today for an appointment and not coming back, so I'll probably head to the gym to get that workout in today.