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BIL gf follow up from last night
The rundown of the issues she presented:
Confronted BIL about why he hasn't put a ring on it. BIL tells her that it's because she needs to work at being a better mom and not pass her daughter to her mother(the one they live with) whenever she doesn't want to deal with her. Also tells her that she's made it obvious by her lack of motivation with school and work she seems to think he's going to take care of her if they were to get married, and he's not down for that and is insulted by her lack of independence and self sufficiency.
(I'd like to point out that probably would have been a great point, if he wasn't living at her parent's house with her rent free, a career college student, and ALSO a part time waiter like her...hypocrite?)
She's also upset bc she'd shown BIL pictures of rings, and they're all over $6,000. He said no. She also wants him to get an engagement ring for her daughter. Then goes on about how she couldn't do a moissanite ring like I did bc "I know you requested a moissanite stone bc you think diamonds are overpriced, but I think it's so trashy and I deserve the real thing. Not an option for me." Well, ok.
Then she had to go because she has to get up early tomorrow to get some new keratin treatment in her hair.
It was grating, fascinating, sad, and hysterical all at the same time. She's very sweet and obviously misguided, but I do feel for her seeing as she is a single mom, and I do think it's wrong for BIL to be so integrated in her daughter's life without a real commitment to her. Her daughter calls him "Daddy".
Maybe I rationalize her stupidity bc I was stupid at 21 too. I've only recently graduated to slightly less stupid in the past couple of years. Gf & I are friendly, but not particularly close, she's like a deaf-mute at events following BIL around and really only talks about when they get married.
So I felt sad. Then I realized she made me miss Don't Be Tardy for the Wedding on Bravo, and then I hated that sluuut.
Re: BIL gf follow up from last night
lol. this is the best.
And you SHOULD hate her for that. I watched one scene where she bought a used wedding dress that originally cost $53k. Then I turned the channel.
I work half days on Fridays, so when I get off and curling up on the couch to watch it. If it's not completely distasteful and horrid, I'm going to be upset. From the sound of it, I will not be disappointed.
I missed some huge backstory.
But, yea, everyone deserves a diamond ring that will put them in the poor(er) house. I don't feel bad for her for one second. There are a lot of single mothers, young, who manage to care for their kids on their own and don't have this sense of entitlement.
The only person I feel bad for is this child caught in the middle. poor kid.
The little girl is probably what makes me sad, because her mother's idiocy will directly affect her. And the entitlement is sad to me because I'm all "Oh honey, you have no idea how stupid that sounds and how off base you are."
But it does grate me when she pulls the whole struggling-single-mom card, especially with the support system she's got; such a joke to me. I know women who raise their kids awesomely as single mothers without any crutch, and am insulted FOR them when she talks like she has it rough.
This. I do give him credit for not being delusional about his situation.
Her age is no excuse. My SIL was an 18 year old single Mom and she sacrificed everything for her education and for her daughter. She knew at that age that a ring should be the least of her concerns. I do feel sorry for the girl that she is so misguided but I predict she'll still be shallow and materialistic at 25.
ETA: how do you keep your mouth shut when someone who is virtually a child herself still living with mommy tells you your ring is trashy?
This stuck out the most to me, too. It seems so effed up.
Ugh, I'm afraid you're right.
I actually enjoyed that thoroughly! I don't know if it was meant to be a jab or if she's really that stupid, either way, it just came off as pathetic. It's kind of adorable to me that a girl like her would even try to be snarky. It was the highlight for me out of the whole conversation.
H said he froze in the office upstairs when he heard that, and swears I giggled.
Why would she trash talk your ring? Not cool.
If her daughter is calling him Daddy, he really needs to assess the situation. It's not fair to have one foot out the door and the other in their lives. Especially if he is living with her parents. It's like an emotional "bull in a china shop" situation.
On the other hand, I wouldn't want to marry this nutter, either.