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Animals lovers, please help.
I also posted this on 12-24. They gave me some great starting suggestions (taking her to the vet, herbal sprays, soft paws --tried that--, climbing areas for her), but I'm wondering if you have any ideas for me? TIA!
Here's the sitch (I said that...I JUST said that):
We adopted a cat that the owner was talking about sending to the ARL (Animal Rescue League) in January because the owner had too many animals. She was adorable, she loved DS, she liked me, she was still kitten-ish. It was great. Then she starts jumping on our counters, which grosses me out to know end, so I get the spray bottle and get after her about it.
Fast forward to the past month, she's become extremely aggressive towards DS, and if DD moves her hand in the cat's general direction, our cat swats at it. She got DS the other day when he was sitting "too close" to her (i.e., within 10 feet) and left a huge gash on his head.
Now she is crazy about our counter tops, she rips open bread bags (which are now located in our microwave) and today I left chicken in a ZipLock bag while I ran to use the washroom, by the time I got back, the cat had chewed threw the bag (she loves eating plastic bags) and dragged the RAW chicken across my kitchen floor and into the middle of the living room. I've got raw chicken juice in my carpet, awesome.
I've tried rehoming her with friends, on craigslist, putting ads in the paper, but I refuse to not let potential pet owners know certain things about an animal so I end up telling everyone about her bad habits and if they have young children I won't allow the cat to go there.
I don't want to take her to a shelter, but she can't stay here anymore. DH keeps saying "we can take her to the farm", but as far as I know, she was never an outdoor cat - although her scavenging skills are pretty honed. And absolutely no one is willing to take her. She's locked up in our bathroom now because I can't trust her around either kid, that's no way for an animal to live.
What would you guys do?
Re: Animals lovers, please help.
First of all, a vet visit is definitely in order. Voice your concerns with them. Is she spayed? I know with male cats, neutering tends to mellow them out a bit.
Soft paws are great, but it sounds like your cat might have an issue with sitting still for long enough (at this point) for you to apply them. (Your vet can also apply them FOR you, of course, for a small fee.)
They make sticky mats that you can put on your countertops/table tops/ etc areas that you don't want your cat to be up on. It sticks to her paws and she will associate that place with the unpleasant experience of having sticky paws. Some people even use aluminum foil, some cats don't like the noise it makes. (Mine would probably play with it, so IDK about that one.)
Most importantly, is she stimulated enough? Does she have toys, a cat tree/window perch, or other places she is allowed to jump up onto? I've found it's a lot easier to redirect my kitten from places I don't want him (ie the dining room table -_-) to an appropriate place (the cat tree) and reward him from playing/scratching/laying on/climbing on the cat tree.
Good Luck with your kitty, HTH!
Ditto PP on using double-sided sticky strips on the counters until the cat is no longer jumping up. You'll have to work around the sticky tape for a while, but I'd say it's worth it to get her to quit jumping! These helped us stop our cat from scratching the corner of our couch, so they definitely work.
I'll also voice the same questions as PP: does the cat have toys, including interactive ones you can play with her with to help stimulate her and get some energy out? She sounds like she's still young, and it's very likely she's going to mellow as she gets older. Our one kitty was insane as a kitten, and still gets pretty crazy sometimes, but she has chilled out a lot in the last year or so; playing with her helped her behave, too. Scratching posts and/or cat trees/perches definitely help; giving them a view out a window is huge, because you really wouldn't believe the kind of enjoyment they get from being able to watch things in the outside world.
Please, whatever you do, do not dump her outside at some farm. Her chances of survival and a long, safe, happy life will decrease drastically, whether from an inability to hunt for food or from fights with other animals or from the odd chance of getting hit by a car.
Talk to your vet about her behavior and see if they can suggest anything to help her.
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
Depending on the farm situation, I'd go that route. The happiest cats I've known are/were barn cats. That's assuming the cat would have a cathouse/bed in a tack room or enclosed room of some sort that either has heat/AC or a way to get in and out and is provided feed in case the cat hasn't caught anything on it's own. Also, if there are other animals, you'd want to make sure they get along before leaving and that whoever cares for them maintains regular shots, etc.
Is she an only cat? How old is she? Kittens have a lot of energy and need mental stimulation as well as play time. This continues until about two years old when they start to mellow out. To me it sounds like she is very bored and is not getting enough exercise or mental stimulation. One of my cats was a holy terror until we adopted our second. Now that he has a friend to play with he is nine million times calmer and all we get from him is his snuggly side. It is really hard to tell from your description whether she is anxious and being aggressive b.c. of it or whether she is being a normal bored kitten.
I would also completely change the way you're interacting with her. Cats can pick up on aggression and agitation and they will react in kind. For example "going after her" with a spray bottle in annoyance is probably going to piss a cat off. I'm not always a fan of spray bottles with cats because it teaches them not to do something WHEN YOU ARE AROUND. It also teaches them to be scared of you, the person with the spray bottle. Double sided sticky tape is a better way to go.
I know one of our regulars crates her cat every day while she's at work for his own safety and I don't see anything wrong with that. When our cat is being an %^& he gets a time out in the bathroom. I would definitely schedule two 15 minute play sessions for her every day, with interactive toys like the feline flyer. My cats also love the cat sitter videos and can watch them for hours. They play with a peekaboo box, fling ama string, and treat balls on their own and those keep them busy as well. I can always tell when they are getting agitated and may bite or scratch b.c. their pupils will dialate, their ears go back and they flick their tails. When they get like that, or when they pounce on my feet, I either walk away or redirect them with a feather toy.
If the behavior is coming from anxiety which leads to aggression feliway diffuser, rescue remedy, cat trees, and, as a last resort, prescription medication, could all be beneficial. But in my own experience this is normal young cat behavior and can best be solved by a kitty friend. Maybe sign up to foster an 8 week old kitten for ARL, I know they rely heavily on foster homes. If you do decide to rehome her, I would contact a cat rescue and ask them to courtesy post her on petfinder. I always use an application, adoption contract, and charge a $50 adoption fee to make sure they don't go to someone sketchy.
Also, read Pam Bennett Johnson's cat behavior books. They will really help you learn to understand the behavior and identify the source. I also have a plastic bag chewer who would absolutely eat raw chicken off my counter, I can put him in the basement when I'm cooking, close the door to the kitchen, make sure to keep all plastic bags hidden, etc.
They also have an average lifespan of two years. I am a firm advocate of barn cats when they cannot live in a household successfully and prefer not to be in human company. Everything in the OP indicates to me that the OP is unfamiliar with cat behavior, not able to read the signals, and not educated on how to modify the behavior. The cat itself sounds perfectly friendly and like it prefers to be around people. Having been inside since she was a kitten, she does not have the survival skills to be outside successfully and given her obvious need for human interaction would probably be pretty unhappy outside. If she wasn't eaten by a fox or run over first.
I'm going to ditto everything kellbell said, because as usual, she has great advice.
As a fellow toddler mama, I'm also going to emphasize how important it is that your kitty has somewhere she can get away to when she wants to be left alone by your LO. No matter how sweet and loving (and well trained) they are, toddlers are intense to be around. They're often loud and move clumsily and aren't great at picking up on subtle cues that the pets would prefer to be left alone. Even the best-natured pet needs to be able to escape when it needs a break. This is especially true right now while you're preoccupied with DD and not able to closely supervise.
A cat tower would be a great solution, so she could still be with the family, but away from grabbing hands. Baby-gating an area for the cat or even, if necessary, giving her some quiet time shut in one of the bedrooms, would also probably help her feel more comfortable.
I am sure you're just stressed managing 2U2, so this seems like a bigger deal than it is. Rehoming is a permanent solution to what is more likely than not a temporary problem. I'd try some of the suggestions above and give it some more time.
"The hardest thing is to live richly in the present without letting it be tainted out of fear for the future or regret for the past." - Sylvia Plath