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Is this a crappy thing to do to my spouse?
DH has an extra week of vacation this year in France (v. his vacation time in the U.S.). We've had a ton of visitors so far, mostly my friends, and he has been able to go off and do long hikes while I hang out and sight-see Paris with them. In fact, he's on a 4-day hike right now. We have a few short trips planned as a family this spring, a trip with just DH in early July and are going to do a longer family trip sometime in the fall.
That leaves August. There's no summer camp for DD, no visitors, no places we really want to go as a family that wouldn't be super crowded. I have family in Spain I could go off and see with DD while DH works or we could all fly to the U.S., but none of those options really appeal to me. The more I think about it, the more I really want to go see a friend who is working in Mozambique for six more months, alone. It's dry season there. I don't really want to take DD because of the expense and the extra vaccines and the fact that it would greatly limit what I could do in Mozambique. DH has no interest in going himself. So I want DH to take a week of vacation time to stay here and hang out with DD, either in Paris or wherever he thinks they can go and avoid crowds, while I fly to Maputo.
Is that super crappy? Or could it be a fun daddy-daughter bonding thing while I do something awesome, win-win kind of situation? I would still have three other weeks in August mostly on my own with DD while DH works every day.
Re: Is this a crappy thing to do to my spouse?
I think it's fair.
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks, Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks
I think taking time for yourself and giving your H and DD some time together would be good for all of you! I vote go for it!
Also, I'm going to need to hear all about what you do on your trip. DH has been dying to get up to Mozambique.
What's good for the goose is good for the gander... if he can do solo trips, then so should you!
It is important for both parents to pursue their own interests to maintain their own identity as individuals and not just being a parent. Also, equally important for both to connect to their offspring...
This. I think that if he's allowed to go on solo trips, then you are, too. And it shouldn't be seen as punishment that he takes a week off from work to spend with his daughter!
2012 Reading Challenge
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Good memory! Yes, his schedule in NYC suuucks, to put it mildly. And there's very little chance I'd ever be able to coordinate his getting off for a week there with me going off somewhere on my own at the same time, so may as well aim for it now.
Thanks for the encouragement, ladies! I just emailed my friend in Maputo to see what dates in August might work for her and then I'll talk to DH when he returns from his hike tonight.
I think it will be great for all of you. If you can get your hubby to go along with it. They will enjoy their time together and at the same time you get mommy grown up time. Good luck!