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While on the topic of cheating - what if BOTH do it?
So, the previous post reminded me of a situation with a couple that I know. Here's the situation:
Husband had to move to a different state for work for about 6 months or so. Wife was in a different state meanwhile finishing her Masters degree. While apart, the wife had an affair with another man at her school. (She blamed lonliness, mid-life crisis, not having her H with her, feeling like she wanted something different out of life, etc.) She does not tell her husband. A few months later, after Husband moves back, he finds out about his wife's affair. He's obviously angry, but he forgives her because he is incredibly devoted to his wife and loves her more than life.
Fast forward three years or so..... Husband is "over" the affair at this point. Life resumes as normal. He doesn't "hold anything over her head" about her affair. Long story short - he recently hit a low point where he was "weak" and he ended up getting a BJ from a girl who he works with. (She was basically getting over a breakup, and called him crying asking him to come over, etc etc etc and one thing lead to another). He has not, and does not intend to tell his wife, and he says it was a huge mistake and stupid, but even with all that, he still plans to keep it a secret. His one guy friend who knows about it is torn about the situation, but he says "well, now they're even."
What do you guys think? Does one bad turn deserve another? If the Husband doesn't tell his wife, is it OK since she never told him (and he just happened to find out)?
I think a marriage based on lies is ridiculous and not worth continuing, but I'm interested in other people's thoughts. If they both cheat - are they even?
Re: While on the topic of cheating - what if BOTH do it?
Two wrongs don't make a right.
They are both wrong for what they chose to do. What a sad and unfortunate situation.
They see us rollin'...they be hatin'.
Do you think he would have allowed cheating to happen if his wife never cheated in the first place?
There is no way around it, cheating is all around bad and very damaging.
They robbed each other the joys and trust of a committed and beautiful relationship and poison has already set in.
Yeah. This is very sad.
So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.
So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.
Right?! What a jerk.
Hilarous. What was going through both their minds at that point I would love to know.
this
Agree with this. It is a shame, all around. I just think there are a lot of people out there who think they can just get away with cheating and not tell the other person. I am a firm believer that you should always, always come clean.
this. Why are they kidding themselves? Neither one of them wants monogamy that bad, or this wouldnta happened.