Trouble in Paradise
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I'll tell you what you're selling in your fictitious shop!

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Re: I'll tell you what you're selling in your fictitious shop!

  • imagepedantic_wench:

    imagebroccolitree:
    imagepedantic_wench:
    *raises hand*
    Century-old first edition books hollowed out to make covert places to stash a flask.

    OoOOOooOh, klassy!

    I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

    I love your Etsy shop.

     

     

    Mine is made to drive people away, apparently.  Who wants lava rocks up their hoo?

    Look with your special eyes.
  • imagecmeinla:
    Can...can I have one, please?
    You have a wide array of really well-made, high quality bath bombs.  However, you never sell a single one because you had the lack of foresight to wittily call your shop Trucker Bombs.  Ew.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imagelint+licker:
    imagepedantic_wench:

    imagebroccolitree:
    imagepedantic_wench:
    *raises hand*
    Century-old first edition books hollowed out to make covert places to stash a flask.

    OoOOOooOh, klassy!

    I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

    I love your Etsy shop.

     

    Mine is made to drive people away, apparently.  Who wants lava rocks up their hoo?

    You and me both. Want to join forces? Buy one pumice butt plug and get an ass-scab and ballhair croissant for half price!

    image.
  • imagelint+licker:

    Mine is made to drive people away, apparently.  Who wants lava rocks up their hoo?

    hippies.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • MotzieMotzie member
    Fifth Anniversary
    Can I get in on this?
  • imagebroccolitree:
    imagehindsight's_a_biotch:

    imagebroccolitree:
    imageimoan:
    ME!
    You take vintage Beatles 45s and melt them, then re-mold them over a bucket to make popcorn bowls.  Not to be washed, have contact with food, or handled.

    oh fail, broc. Just fail. She would never, NEVER do anything to a beatles album.

    I think she'd sell them but you'd have to fill out her questionnaire, submit a background check, and complete a home visit before shipping.

    Because pedantic would totally gut a book.  B*tch please.

    Um, she would and she has. I have the proof. You, too, can have your very own flask hider made by pedantic at www.justmybiblenothingtoseehere.etsy.com. I LOVE mine!

    I agree with everything that muddled said. You should listen to her. -ESDReturns
  • cmeinlacmeinla member
    Fifth Anniversary Combo Breaker

    imagebroccolitree:
    imagecmeinla:
    Can...can I have one, please?
    You have a wide array of really well-made, high quality bath bombs.  However, you never sell a single one because you had the lack of foresight to wittily call your shop Trucker Bombs.  Ew.

    I just snorted....

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageMotzie:
    Can I get in on this?
    You use your cache of paint samples to create art and knick-knacks... swatch Christmas ornaments and wreaths, specifically.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Festering band aid and rancid butter muffins with wiry eyebrow streusel are on sale now! Buy 12 get 1 free!
    image.
  • imageSweetCuppinCakes:
    imagelint+licker:
    imagepedantic_wench:

    imagebroccolitree:
    imagepedantic_wench:
    *raises hand*
    Century-old first edition books hollowed out to make covert places to stash a flask.

    OoOOOooOh, klassy!

    I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

    I love your Etsy shop.

     

    Mine is made to drive people away, apparently.  Who wants lava rocks up their hoo?

    You and me both. Want to join forces? Buy one pumice butt plug and get an ass-scab and ballhair croissant for half price!

    Sure, we'll make a joint site that is very...market-specific.

    Look with your special eyes.
  • The house special: Chlamydia Cupcake with a used condom center and anal bead decoration on top.
    image.
  • If you have time, me too!

    (I was going to say "do me" but I'm afraid you'd bust out one of lintlicker's volcano rock dildos...  EEEK!)

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageGeek_Girl:

    If you have time, me too!

    (I was going to say "do me" but I'm afraid you'd bust out one of lintlicker's volcano rock dildos...  EEEK!)

    Capes.  Some comic & nerd themed, but mostly everyday wear for the wizard on the go.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imageGeek_Girl:

    If you have time, me too!

    (I was going to say "do me" but I'm afraid you'd bust out one of lintlicker's volcano rock dildos...  EEEK!)

    There's mica embedded in there, for those who want the extra glitter.

    Look with your special eyes.
  • imagebroccolitree:
    imageGeek_Girl:

    If you have time, me too!

    (I was going to say "do me" but I'm afraid you'd bust out one of lintlicker's volcano rock dildos...  EEEK!)

    Capes.  Some comic & nerd themed, but mostly everyday wear for the wizard on the go.

    This is perfect!  I can use my left-over upholstery fabric for colder-weather capes, yes?

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imagelint+licker:
    imageGeek_Girl:

    If you have time, me too!

    (I was going to say "do me" but I'm afraid you'd bust out one of lintlicker's volcano rock dildos...  EEEK!)

    There's mica embedded in there, for those who want the extra glitter.

    Well, in that case, I'll take 3!

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageGeek_Girl:
    imagebroccolitree:
    imageGeek_Girl:

    If you have time, me too!

    (I was going to say "do me" but I'm afraid you'd bust out one of lintlicker's volcano rock dildos...  EEEK!)

    Capes.  Some comic & nerd themed, but mostly everyday wear for the wizard on the go.

    This is perfect!  I can use my left-over upholstery fabric for colder-weather capes, yes?

    Yes, but the shipping costs for Norwegian wizards will be astronomical.

    You also receive an entirely unexpected bump in sales in year 3 when you discover by accident that a backwards cape is just a nursing cover.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • MotzieMotzie member
    Fifth Anniversary

    imagebroccolitree:
    imageMotzie:
    Can I get in on this?
    You use your cache of paint samples to create art and knick-knacks... swatch Christmas ornaments and wreaths, specifically.

    Confession: Just yesterday I was wishing I was creative enough to make some sort of collage art out of all these paint chips I have.

  • I'm late, but I'm sure you'll make an exception for me, right? RIGHT?!
  • Smock, you make lovingly monogrammed family cloth. I mean really, as there anything else you'd sell? You also sell carbon offsets for shipping.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Can I also make fancy hats for future dictators? It's important for dictators and overlords of all kinds to have a signature hat.

    P.S. I promise to use separate materials for the hats and family cloths.  

  • YOU MAY NOT INSINUATE YOUR OWN MERCHANDISE FOR YOUR FICITITIOUS SHOP. SCC AND SMOCK ARE NOW BANNED?
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Shhhh have a cupcake..

    image

     

    image.
  • GBCKGBCK member
    Ancient Membership Combo Breaker

    I'm selling awesome.

    Right?

    right? 

  • Gbck, you sell balls crocheted together to make molecule plushies.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I don't think I have laughed so hard at a thread in the history of my nesting.

    I want one. This is awesome.

    Oh, FFS.
  • Malibu, you make fascinators out of colored tulle, satin ribbon, many different premium feathers, and taxidermied rodent heads.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imagebroccolitree:
    Malibu, you make fascinators out of colored tulle, satin ribbon, many different premium feathers, and taxidermied rodent heads.

    This is awesome.

    We recently discovered a rodent issue contained to one room of our basement, so I'll have plenty of stock to work with, at least until the exterminator comes.

    Oh, FFS.
  • GBCKGBCK member
    Ancient Membership Combo Breaker

    YAY!

    If I remembered how to crochet (I used to know), I'd make you a molecule ball plushie :) 

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