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Painful Sex
I've seen that there have been a few posts about painful sex, however mine doesn't have to do with any medical problem. I've been engaged to my fiance for going on 2 years and we've had sex before. My problem is that I moved out of the country a little over a year ago for school, and more recently, whenever I'm back and we engage in sex it's a painful process and he ends up making me bleed.
I've talked to my doctor about this issue, and he said it was from lack of lubrication that I'm *sorry about the image or w/e* getting torn apart. My concern is that we are getting married in April and I will only be seeing hime twice before. I'd like to stay more abstinent before the wedding to make the wedding night a little more special.
My question is if anyone has any advice as to how to....prepare (for lack of a better term) for the wedding night to avoid the pain and bleeding
Re: Painful Sex
Not to bring you down but personally, the wedding night did NOT include sex. By the time we actually got back to our suite it was late and our adrenaline had been running so high all day that we ended up just ordering pizza and opening our gifts on the bed and then CRASHING. The next night of course we had our energy back.
I understand however that wanting to be ready for your first night as a married couple is important to you (as it was for me) but there is a great chance sex will not be included in it; sorry to say.
I know that is not the answer you were looking for so I will also say this: You say you want to remain abstinent until that night. Does that include abstinence in all forms or just between the two of you? In other words, do you plan to remain abstinent from yourself? If not I recommend preparing your body that way- by not letting it go so long between times of stimulation as it sounds you have been doing by seeing your fiance so infrequently.
Agreed!
But if you plan on doing the deed on your wedding night use lubricant. I was a virgin at my wedding, and our first time we used lube and it was much easier. dont use too much!
I'm at a very different stage of my marriage having had several decades of intercourse with my wife, but there is a parallel, since she currently has a similar condition to you. My wife went through menopause several years ago. Ever since, she has found that intercourse has caused pain, due to dryness and other vaginal changes. We sometimes try lube, but it's kind of a hassle, and she still seems to find it painful. So we have pretty much stopped having intercourse altogether. It's been months or maybe years since we even tried.
Now, I don't know what your husband's sexual tastes might be, but for me as a husband with a very strong sex drive, I'm perfectly satisfied as long as we're having some sort of sex - it doesn't necessarily have to be intercourse, and since we stopped I can't say I miss it. These days, we do mostly oral, which I find meets my sexual needs very well indeed. Of course, we're long past the time when we were trying to have babies, so that isn't a concern as it might be for you. But depending on your husband's sexual tastes, and yours, you can probably have a very satisfying wedding night, as well a lifetime of satisfying sex, without actually having intercourse. So I wouldn't fret too much. But this seems like something you should probably discuss with him.