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So, we're not spending enought time together?
Posted this to another board, as well.
Ok, so I've been a lurker on here for a while now, but I've decided I really need to get pro-active about my marriage. Here goes:
We've been together for 5 years (married for 3). Life is busy. We both work full-time, and I've recently begun going to the gym very actively(DH can't come with me, because he has some health issues. I go with a friend form work). I cook dinner every night, I also do all the usual housework, except the laundry, that's his chore. We both have big families, so we spend a lot of time with them on the weekends, and I'll admit, it really doesn't feel like we spend that much quality time together. I just don't get how I'm supposed to fix it. I've instituted weekly date nights--every friday night we hit a local place and relax and chat about our weeks, etc.
I know life is busy, and I'm pretty sure it only gets worse. I never thought we'd ever get to the point that DH thought we don't spend enough time together, but here we are. I've really been thinking about kids lately, too. We currently don't have any, but part of the reason I'm hitting the gym so hard is that I want to lose some weight and get healthy so I can have babies. DH can't even think kids right now, because he says we don't even have time for us, let alone babies. I disagree with him slightly. I don't think people decide to have babies becaue they have an excess of time to use up.
Help, Please!
Re: So, we're not spending enought time together?
Breakfast together isn't really an option, unfortunately. DH leaves for work at 5AM, which would mean I'd need to get up at 4 to consider breakfast. And then got bake to sleep before I start my 10AM-6PM job. I've tried it. I end up tired and miserable by 3pm, and then I crash as soon as i get home.
I 100 percent agree with him on the kids thing. You can't cancel things now to spend time with him. So how in the world will you get anytime with him then if you can't do it now.
Your husband should be your number 1 priority. The cleaning can wait. The other members of your family can wait. You have a husband who needs and is openly expressing some quality time. This is something that should be had every single night. You could play cards take a walk or just talk. Turn off the cells, TV, and computers and just hang out with him. It's really not that hard.
(The workouts are honestly pretty damn important..gotta take care of your health.)
All of this.
my read shelf:
Yeah, I agree with this. If anything, cut out time with family. Make sure he feels like he's a priority. Also, cut down on TV, cell phones, computers, and all of that stuff.
Also, is the bedroom life okay? If that's not happening much, he might also be hinting at a lack of sex life. A man can't live like that for long.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10