Relationships
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Confused and wanting to fix this
My fiance and I have been together for a year and a half now. When we gave birth to our daughter 9 months ago our sex life changed dramatically. I know that this is normal for a period of time however I am always the one that wants it. He has turned me down in many ways usually by not kissing me back when I kiss him. He has also lost interest in any other form of intimacy throughout the day. He says I am too clingy but he used to love the way I would stop and give him a kiss or a hug frequently. Now he acts as if I am annoying. When I bring up the subject of our intimacy he just shuts down and gets upset at me. I went through a period of time where I thought he was cheating and looked through his phone after a night he spent with friends getting drunk (which I know was wrong) and I found him hiding things from me. There were messages on his phone which were deleted to and from the friends he had left with during the time he was with them. They were at a concert. When I approached him about it at first he refused to talk about it and got extremely mad at me then he said his friends wanted to get him to find drugs which I am against so he deleted the messages. I found stains in his underwear from that night although I never said anything about it. He swears nothing happened but I have a horrible feeling about that night. He has also admitted that he gets off in the shower although how frequently I do not know. Why is he not interested in me? Obviously his drive can't be that low. I'm not unattractive, I'm 120pounds with long, dark hair. I'm not what you would say as "hot". People generally call me "cute" "pretty" or "beautiful". I am insecure and I know that bothers him but does that call for all of this? I am so confused.
Re: Confused and wanting to fix this
So, you got pregnant like the minute you met, you got engaged, you had a child, you know he or at least his close friends is/are using drugs and that isn't okay with you, and he might be cheating on you when he goes out with these friends? DTMFA.
He doesn't sound like something worth fixing. Think about what kind of environment you want to raise your baby in.
If you're set on fixing it, counseling may help.
Do you want your daughter to think this kind of relationship is okay? She's too young to notice now, but pretty soon she won't be.
I agree with PPs. He doesn't sound like something worth fixing. I don't even know that counseling would help either. He seems like a hopeless case.