Sex & Romance
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Trouble with Orgasm regarding boyfriend
So me and my boyfriend have been together for a year, I can finish every time but he has trouble . I can give him oral stimulation for hours or ride him but nothing . He has to get him self off well i am just there watching. He's told me its not me at all in the past nobody has been able to make him orgasm with oral. It makes me feel really sad that I can't do that for him, i want to so badly . I should say that he can orgasm when hes inside of me but sometimes he has to stimulate himself. Besides this problem we have great sex he tells all the time. Anyone else experienced this before?
Re: Trouble with Orgasm regarding boyfriend
This is very likely due to him using too tight or forceful grip and method when he masturbates,...it is very common among young men. Essentially, he has unwittingly 'trained' himself to respond to a level and type of stimulation that is totally different to anything that he would experience with a womans body,....either mouth or vagina. If he was circumcised then that too will not help him as a large part (up to two thirds) of his most sensual nerve ends will have been removed making it even harder for him to feel tactile stimulation and voluptus. This may well be the reason he started to use too much pressure or grip in the first place.
The best thing for him is to carefully 'retrain' his responses to a more gentle and sensual set of stimulations so that he can respond normally with a womans touch in love making. The best way to do this is form him to completely stop all masturbation until he is very frustrated and anxious to reach a climax,...then only use gentle stimulation with lots of sensual foreplay until he is able to reach orgasm with 'normal' love-making.......preferably with your help.
..........If he recognises the cause of the problem and sticks to the program he will be 'cured' in a few weeks and be able to move on to a much more sensual life.
I suggest a sex therapist. There's some kind of issue where he *thinks* masturbating is good but oral sex and intercourse is *bad*.
This is fixable with a sex therapist's help.:) GL.
I agree with some of the above posters about the tight gripping masturbation and their advice. But I would also suggest that when he masturbates from here on out (with the opposite hand as PP's mentioned) that he also wear a condom. This will help block out some of the stimulation so that he is more sensitive. And don't feel bad because this is a common thing and it doesn't have to do with his attraction to you.
try LOTS of lube and anal(being on top helps for you yes it hurts like heck. but you will be tight enough to get him off). I don't like anal but its the only way I can get my bf to orgasm safer than pregnancy too.