July 2009 Weddings
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Let's talk childbirth...
Specifically, epidurals.
Moms, did you have one or not? Was this your "plan"? I'd love to hear about your experience and if you would do it the same way the 2nd time.
Moms to be, what are your plans?
Future moms (who maybe aren't expecting yet), what are your thoughts on it/future plans? I know I definitely had thoughts before I got pregnant, and they have changed slightly but not too much.
Re: Let's talk childbirth...
I had one. I didn't want to get one initially, but after 18 hours and still only being 4cm I didn't think I could make it and would be too tired to push.
Will I do it again the next time. He!! NO! I will not be having an epidural ever again. It has caused so many problems with my back and legs that it is so not worth it to me. I can't lay flat on my back anymore and my legs give out every once in a while. I still get shooting pains downs them almost daily too. I was told that would go away after a few months, but here we are almost 2 years later and I still have them.
I also hated being stuck in bed for 15 hours. I didn't have Parker until hour 33. You are having a girl so you shouldn't be in labor that long (at least that is what my nurses said. They said boys are always more stubborn!).
With the epidural I could still feel my legs so I was able to push in different positions which helped. Being on all fours really took the pressure off my back.
I should also say that I am probably in the minority. Most epidurals work and don't cause lasting issues.
I am not opposed to an epidural, but would like to try without it. In the very least, my plan is to go as long as possible without it. Our childbirth class confirmed that for me this week, after realizing that there are so many other options regarding labor and pushing positions when you don't have an epidural. I also hope to labor at home as long as possible.
With all that being said, if the pain gets to be way too much or if labor gets too long and I'm just exhausted to the point of no return, I am open to the epidural.
Lastly, I'm not going to be disappointed in myself if things don't go as planned. I am not writing out a big huge birth plan because I think that could just set me up for disappointment.
This is pretty much exactly my non-pregnant opinion. My best friend and I were talking about it last week and she wants to avoid an epi if at all possible. The potential side effects really scare her, and I'm not thrilled with them either.
Even still, I'm all for medical aid if necessary. Yay for meds!
Thay said, I still want to do plenty of research when rhe time comes and in the end whatever happens is okay with me.
My Dr's and I are pretty confident this kid is coming by c-section. She's breech and on the verge of an IUGR (6th percentile, their cutoff is 5th), so their looking at an early delivery of hopefully 34 weeks.
However- if it's safe for a vaginal birth, I am in the "wait and see" camp. I'm pretty sure I'd probably end up getting one, but I'd want to wait it out and see what labor was like without one first before I jumped the gun.
We haven't taken our childbirth class yet, we're going July 8 & 15 at 34 weeks. Good for you Marisa for going early!
I have no birth plan really, I have a couple things I would like, but I'm not writing anything out. As far as the epi goes, I'm very open to it and will probably get one. I would like to see if my hospital offers the "walking" epi, I forget the correct name for it, but apparently it's like a combo of a spinal and epi and you can still feel your legs with it and possibly still walk around. I think this would be my best option. I want the pain relief, but I'd still like to be able to feel my legs.
I do want to try to labor at home as long as possible, and since we literally live 5 minutes from the hospital (it's exactly 1 mile away), I don't see this being a problem. Of course if my water breaks, or I am GSB+, or I need to be induced my plans will change.
Oh and FYI, the sex of the baby has no bearing on how long your labor will be, my mom was in labor with me for 66 hours, my frank breech vaginally birthed sister for 12 hours, and my brother who ended up being an emergency c-section for 14 hours. It's all about the baby, what position it's in, and how your body handles it all.
Clearly, not a mom. However after talking with a lot of friends who are moms and you ladies on here, I highly doubt I will have an epidural when I do eventually have kids. Perfectly honestly, I would rather do a natural home birth with a midwife and doula than spend one second in a hospital, but Steve has already said that would freak him out way too much. Hopefully a birthing center will open in Atlanta before this is a real issue for us.
That said, I can understand why having an epidural is something other people would choose to have. There are definitely pros and cons to both sides. For me, personally, it doesn't seem like something I would want.
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Speaking as someone who is not pregnant...bring on the drugs! I don't have a high tolerance for pain, hell I have to take something for the pain before and after going for a pap. I've actually had this conversation with my mom because she got an epi for both of my brothers, but with me the labor was faster and by the time she got settled it was too late. Other than the pain difference, she said the experience was the same and that afterwards she couldn't tell you whether she was more "out of it" when she had the epi or when she'd gone naturally.
I feel like whenever this discussion comes up (not necessarily on here, but in general) there's always judgement on both sides for the other. I don't think anyone has to feel bad about choosing to get an epi and I don't think anyone who chooses to go natural is a better mother. Everyone needs to make the decision that is right for them and trust in their doctors.
I did not have an epi and my plan was to try to go without one. I was in the camp that the possible side effects scared me, also you hear of a lot more complications with epidurals - the need for pitocin and other interventions, etc. And I wanted to be able to move and labor in different positions.
However, I was only at the hospital for about 2 1/2 hour before Mackenzie was born and almost 2 hours of that was pushing. I laboured at home until my water broke and then things picked up significantly. So I didn't really have time and wasn't one of those people who was in labor forever. I honestly can't say what I would have done had my labor been longer. I do remember telling B when we were in the triage room still that I didn't think I could do it without drugs
Holy moly, how is it that you are already 18 weeks!
Yep. I got through the first 2 days without one, and after my water broke in the middle of the night and my contractions really got going I was too tired to do anything other than sleep between contractions. I also only went from 2cm to 4 in nearly 6 hours, so they said that something had to be done because I was progressing too slowly.
I got the epi (which was textbook) 9 hours after my water had broke and I was at 5.5cm, an hour and a half later I was a full 10, he was on his way down and we were ready to go! That feeling was better than the epidural lol.
Then came the complications. Wyatt was not in a favorable position, and I had to be on my back so his head got stuck behind my pubic bone. After pushing for more than an hour they pulled out the vacuum (popped off twice), then on their third try his head was born. His head wouldn't turn, and they realized that he had shoulder dystocia, which was a very scary few minutes as they tried to get him out. Again, because of the epi I couldn't change position so they hoisted my legs up to my ears, pushed down on my belly, and the doctor had to reach her hand in and remove his shoulders... which resulted in a 3rd degree tear.
So no, I will not be opting for an epi this time around, which at my hospital isn't a big deal because they're understaffed and only do epidurals for women who 'need' them (about 5% according to my doctor, they do spinals for sections). My biggest obstacle will likely be avoiding an induction to avoid getting to the point where I'm too tired to function, much less labor. I ended up going into labor on my own on day 3 anyway, and it makes me wonder what it would have been like if I had insisted on going 2 more days.
My plan was to try to do it without one... And I did labor for 9 hours without one, until they decided to do a c section, at which point they gave me the spinal in the operating room. Looking back, I totally should have asked for one. I think you have to be open to anything because you never know what labor and delivery will bring.
I will have a repeat c section next time around, but if it wasn't for that I would totally go the epidural route!!
No kidding! We've bought NOTHING for this baby yet and I'm being way too indecisive about the nursery so it may be another few weeks before that gets painted lol. My bump is still in the looking like fat stage unless I eat or have to pee, so I haven't done any HDBD pics yet. Once I get back from London I will though.
No worries. We JUST bought our first nursery stuff last week- and that's only because they told us she will probably be here within the next 6 weeks. Otherwise we would still be procrastinating. The only thing I had bought before that was an outfit or two. And I hear you about the nursery options. I am the queen of indecision. :-P
Don't worry about it! We didn't start the nursery until Memorial Day weekend when I was like 28 weeks. I did buy stuff before then, but mostly because I'm bored and it gives me stuff to do. Plus, you might want to wait for your shower to buy a lot of stuff. I waited for mine, got the gifts and now have made my list of things to buy with the registry completion coupons. Plus it gave me time to really bargain hunt and find the best deals and accumulate coupons and wait for sales.
I pushed for 1.5 hours without an epi, but decided I wanted one once Felipe stopped coming down (turns out he was stuck face up). I actually got two epidurals, neither of which worked. Med-free was never my plan, and I hadn't taken a birthing class, so I was pretty unprepared for the pain/pain management. That said, the actual labor/pushing pain (I pushed for 2.5 hours before the babies were vacuumed out) was bearable in comparison to the pain from the complications--the episiotomy, vacuum deliveries, and the fact that my doctor had to reach in and help pull Chloe out, plus continue to reach in to remove blood clots because my uterus wasn't contracting back. Long story short: had I not had the complications, my epis not working wouldn't have been so terrible. The fact that I *did* have complications though makes me wish that they had worked! If I ever do this again, I would still try for an epidural even though there's a chance it won't work again...I will also take a birthing class next time around!! (sorry for the formatting...I can never get my iPad to format correctly)
Dont worry...Landon is a month old and still doesn't have a nursery since we are moving in 2 weeks. You'll all be fine!
I did get one and will NOT get one again. It was a horrible and terrifying experience, add in all the other problems I had and I will go through any pain to not relive that.
I went in hoping to do without but thinking I would get one if I needed it. I had been stuck in bed the whole time because I was on magnesium sulfate for my pre-e so I couldn't walk around to try and relieve the pain. I was only in labor for 10 hours total but at 7cm and hour 7 I got the epidural. Going in I honestly didn't feel it at all. They had to do it 2 times to get it in. Then I had the side effect of lowering blood pressure and I passed out. Literally falling off the bed with 3 nurses and 3 dr's in there trying to get me to wake up. It took 45 minutes until I came too and I had no pain relief at all. They tried again with a smaller dose and the same thing happened but they pushed the meds to bring my blood pressure back up fast enough that I didn't go unconscious that time. I got pain relief for about 15 minutes and then it didn't work. I was now 9cm and I couldn't get any other pain meds so I did the rest without. After all of that my injection site (not sure if thats what they call it) didn't heal over so I was leaking spinal fluid. They tried to fix it with blood patches, 3 times and it didn't work. Then I dealt with spinal headaches where you literally can't be anything up laying flat for 11 days. I would stand up to go to the bathroom and it would hurt so bad I would puke. That pain was worse than labor.
I hope I didn't scare you. If I get any drugs next time it will just be IV meds.
I had an epidural but I pretty much didn't have another option because of my c-section. If I had to have a c-section yes it was in the plans but that all being said I don't think you go into labor thinking you'll have to have a c-section unless you have a schedule c-section. If I had to have another c-section I guess that Yes I would have another epidural... did I like it NO I hated the fact that I couldn't feel my legs for about 1/2 day afterwards, and because you have these compression things on your legs you can't get up. Not that I wanted to get up any sooner because getting up after a c-section is not fun. Also.. note that a c-section epidural isn't the same as a regular epidural.
Now if I didn't have a c-section would I get an epidural.. absolutely not. When I got my epidural I was already 10cm dilated. For me labor and contractions weren't to huge of a deal. Sure contractions got to be more and more uncomfortable and hurt a bit the closer I got to 10cm but I kept my mind off of it as much as I could and breathed through them.
Remember everyone's experience is different than what yours will be and you have to make the decision that is right for you. For me I really wanted to go natural if I could and that's why I labored that way until they gave me a drug to stop my contractions after my water broke. Once my water broke because she was breech they didn't want me contracting anymore.. and I didn't go into surgery until about 3/4 hour later. That's when I got the epidural, just before I got onto the table in the O/R.
#1-BFP 08-22-09 ~ M/C 08-31-09 at 5 weeks 6 days
#2-BFP 08-6-11 ~ Due 04/18 ~ born via c-section April 22, 2012
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Taylina was breech until I was 32 weeks.. then she was head down until my due date, 4 days before I had her when she decided to flip breech again.. stubborn baby lol.
#1-BFP 08-22-09 ~ M/C 08-31-09 at 5 weeks 6 days
#2-BFP 08-6-11 ~ Due 04/18 ~ born via c-section April 22, 2012
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I plan to have the baby drug free. I will take birthing classes and read books, peoples stories and websites. I want to prepare myself as much as one can so that I know I am going in prepared for the pain and with ways to manage it. I don't want to go in thinking "I'll go as long as possible and then get one" I personally know that if I HAVE to get it I will be fine because I did what I could to prepare naturally.
Someone said that they aren't doing a birth plan because they want the baby out however is healthy (or something to that effect) I also want my baby to come out however is healthy and safe but I don't think a birth plan has anything to do with that. Mine will just emphasize that I do not want to be offered drugs, I only want my husband in the room -no other family, we want 1 hour alone before visitors are allowed in, I want to BF right away, I don't want them feeding the baby (obviously unless it's necessary) I want them to wait to clamp the cord until it stops pulsing, DH cut the cord, ect.... I'm also calling it our birthing preference not plan. These have really nothing to do with getting the baby out safely.
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