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WWYD in this situation?... *Long- Sorry!*
Hi there!
I have a situation that I need some advice for...
As some of you may know, I recently left my BF due to an abusive situation that occured 2 weeks ago. I have filed for a restraining order on him and went to court yesterday regarding that matter to be sure that the the restriaining order remains and is not dropped. I was told by his the attorny not to have any contact with my ex or any of his friends/family because doing so would be a trigger for him to violate his no contact order and would place him in jail on a 5 year sentence.
Well, with that said, his friends and family were contacting me via cell phone calls and text messages. (I changed my cell phone number a week ago and the communication has stopped).
But, my situation where I need advice is this... My ex's little brother and GF are expecting their first child together in September. Since the day I met said GF, we were instantly bonded in a sister sort-of way and I have been there for her during her entire pregnancy (up until this all went down two weeks ago and was told for the sake of myself and my ex, to not have contact). She had asked me to go to be the baby's God mother and I was SO honored and excited. I attended almost every pre-natal appointment with her and my ex's brother, I went on a tour of the hospital with her, I have spent hundreds of dollars on baby items that they will need, and also a week before the terrible incident with my ex, I sent out baby shower invites to 30 people for the baby shower that I had been planning for them for the past couple of months... Now ever since this nightmare happened, all of this has come to a screeching hault... how can I be involved in planning and hosting a baby shower for someone whom I am not supposed to be even contacting?
This is so hard for me. I passed along every thing that I bought for the baby shower as well as my planner with all of the things that I needed to do to prepare for the party. Before I changed my number, we had spoke about it and I offered to still help in some way possible even though I have been told by my friends and family that because of this unfortunate situation between my ex and I, that I need to move on from every one in relation to him. "Change your number, never talk to them again" kind of move on. I just don't know what to do... and I feel that in a way I am abandoning them. Is there a way to keep a "secret" communication line open between us or is this risking my ex contacting me/ coming after me?
What would you do in this situation? Would you still be apart of their life? Or say "it is what it is" and move on? Any advice is appreciatd and I will answer any questions... I am sure that I left out a lot of the story!
Sorry I am rambling, it is a half day at work today so I am trying to type this as fast as possible and still get some work done 
Re: WWYD in this situation?... *Long- Sorry!*
Hell noes!!
You discontinue all contact with that bunch of loonies --- cut them off; change your cell phone number, email addy, landline, whatever it is you've got, change it --- and if you get snail mail, return it unopened RETURN TO SENDER.
Write that on the letter and then drop it into the mailbox.
This leaves you in a heck of a predicament with the mother to be.
Considering what happened, I think it's best if you cancel the shower.
Eat the cost of the baby items.
Drop a postcard into the mail and tell these people that the shower is cancelled.
Tell the MTB in question first that considering the wicked circumstances, you feel it's best that you do not give her a shower and apologize.
And I think it's best that you step down from godmother duties, also.
If you have any baby items you were going to give her, perhaps donate them to a homeless mother's shelter or a homeless shelter. Somebody can use them.
THis is a rough one. Being nice is one thing but you have to look out for yourself and your safety. GL.
Thank you! That is what I need to remember, and what I needed to hear!
Sometimes a situation cannot be warranted, considering what has happened.
Aiyiyi, Renee... this is, as the Brits say, hard cheese. Wishing you luck.:(