Trouble in Paradise
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
I've ruined my husband(FOLLOW-UP)
UPDATE ON MY SITCH: Things have been going better as of lately(but not before it got really bad). And I want to say thanks to everyone who took the time to offer advice. So, the really bad...in a nutshell hubby got pissed at me for confronting him about his fb again and all the disgusting web sites that he "liked" of nearly naked women. The one called"beautiful girls magazine" really bothered me because I know I'll never compare to them...grrr! Anyway, he told me he was just being who he is, blah, blah, blah. I told him it was ok...everyone would find out who he is and just how things really are. That made him change his tune...quick!!! He sent me a friend request(I secretly opened a fb account to see what he was up to)but later told him about it. He took down all the nasty crap, changed his relationship status from 'its complicated' to married and even posted a pic of me and him together and another one of me. Oh, and he is wearing his wedding ring again. He hasn't been throwing things in my face lately and we've been communicating alot better. I know im pretty excited about this turn of events...but trust me, im still utterly cautious. I know things can easily go from good to s#%$hole in a moments notice.
Re: I've ruined my husband(FOLLOW-UP)
THIS. x 10000000000000
I vaguely remember the first thread by OP, but honestly, what makes you think that your H is not pulling the wool over your eyes by suddenly acting like the 'model husband'? And you honestly place faith in your relationship based on his fb status and a few pictures? What is wrong with this picture?
THIS. x 10000000000000
I vaguely remember the first thread by OP, but honestly, what makes you think that your H is not pulling the wool over your eyes by suddenly acting like the 'model husband'? And you honestly place faith in your relationship based on his fb status and a few pictures? What is wrong with this picture?
Good grief.:(
Sis, I'll be blunt: he's a louse.
He could be registered in FB, Hi5, MySpace and tully only knows how many other social media sites under an alias. You'll never find him. I guarantee that he is up to his usual tricks. The apple never falls far from the tree.
Quit while you're ahead. You're better off without him.
Seriously sister, he can have a dozen emails, profiles, etc. If checking his comp activity is how you caught him in the past he probably just uses the Private Browser function now or deletes his comp history before he logs off. No one just changes like that when threatened with being exposed. They fine tune their act so it is more difficult to catch them. Checking his phone is useless too because he can have an account you dont even know about.
Sounds like the only reason he supposedly cleaned up is so you wouldnt tell people about him, and probably so he doesnt have to deal with paying for a divorce. I'm sorry but I highly doubt your problems are over my dear.
He isn't devoted, why stay with someone like that? If you are worried about what people will think- who cares? I'm sure everyone knows he is a loser already if he was all out and about on FB. Even if they dont, it isnt their life. They dont have to live in misery if you stay with him. You do.
Normal bloodwork, HSG and S/A
Med Cycles #1-5: 50mg Clomid, Novarel trigger, TI and 2 IUI's--> all BFN's
April, May 2012: Natural Cycles, BFN's
Med Cycle #6: Follistim with trigger and IUI --> BFFN
Ovarian endometriosis discovered in July, treated with laparoscopy 8/3
September Siggy: Birthday Cake MARTINIS
have you gotten any counseling at all for you? you certainly need it and so will your kids eventually. you are setting a really bad example for them. you beg a douche to stay? would you want your daughter to stay?
no, it isnt easy to leave it is then bry hard, but allowing yourself to be treated like a piece of shiot and then begging for more is going to be harder to live with in the long run!
you need to get some help mentally, get some self respect and set a good example for your children!
You really need to get away from this guy. Do you honestly think this is healthy?! If one of your friends told you that their relationship was like this how would you counsel them? You really do deserve better than this d-bag. Just remember a tiger can not change his stripes.
Just this. As a fellow woman who was 'sucked in' numerous times by a pathological liar, please know that it's simply not worth the wondering/questioning.
This is what I told you the first time and it still applies:
The worst part is that you're raising your kids in this environment. For their sake, leave and do whatever you need to financially to make it work and be able to support them. Move back with family, get a second job, whatever. You're teaching your kids not to respect you, not to have respect for themselves, not to respect their partners and to use toxic communication methods within a relationship. If you don't like yourself enough to get out, like your kids enough to want to raise them as emotionally healthy, happy people.
You cheated, he left, he emotionally checked out, he told you he wants a divorce, he is emotionally abusive and controlling. You can continue to drag this entire charade out, right in front of your kids, but it will never end well. Ever. Regardless of feelings of lust or even love, you guys do not respect each other and never will respect each other. It's bad enough to have so little respect for yourself as to settle for such a fucked up relationship, but to teach your kids that treating each other this way is ok is HORRIBLE.