Sex & Romance
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Blood Pressure medication
If you are in a relationship were your SO is one blood pressure medicine how do you deal with it?
Sorry if this is tmi....but the night we were up until 3am because when he was ready he wasn't staying that way long enough for anything to happen. We tried oral, and a few other things but nothing worked. I want him to be happy and be able to enjoy this time together. We are also talking about starting about a year from now having more kids(we have a 1 year old).
Any advice will be appreciated?
P.S. sorry for any type o's.
Re: Blood Pressure medication
How often has this been happening?
If it is a very rare occurance or this was the only time that this has happened, it happens.... but if this continues on more or less a regular basis, it's time for him to get a full medical evaluation.
If he was drinking that night, the alcohol could have been a contributing factor.
The penis is the dipstick to a man's health, the same as the period is a woman's red flag.
I don't think high blood pressure has impotence as a "side effect." I don't know if his meds for BP can have impotence (or lowered libido) as a side effect.
At any rate, if the erectile problems happen frequently, he needs to see a doc.
He needs to be evaluated for thyroid problems, hormone deficiencies, diabetes, ciruclatory problems and cardiac issues --- lots of docs will more or less classify a guy with erection problems as a cardiac patient until otherwise proven.
On the off chance, he should ask his doc if his bp meds can cause erection problems. Maybe he can have his meds changed to some thing else as a just in case. Every patient reacts differently to medication.
Wishing you luck. Now's not the time for your SO to be shy about his health.
If he refuses to see a doc and these problems keep happening, time to rethink him -- and here is why:
Who needs a guy who isn't proactive about his health?? Corny as it sounds, when you have your health, you do have everything --- and it is also a matter of character and ensuring that your partner is happy. Sexual happiness counts, too. Making sure you are sexually satisfied is his business; this is part of being a team as a couple.
ETA: I just had a look at your past posts.
You and he are getting married in about 3 weeks....if the ED problems are frequent starting now, fine kettle of fish that you and he have there.
I would also advise you -- if this is the case that the problems keep happening --- to put the wedding date on hold. And put it on hold until the problem with his ED is solved.
If all medical causes for ED are ruled out -- he's fine in all departments and is healthy as a horse w/the exception of high blood pressure he needs meds for --- it could also be psychological.
Perhaps he isn't ready to TTC a second kiddo and "this" is his way of telling you. Perhaps he is also afraid orf commitment...and the ED is showing up as a psychological presentation to the committment.
Anything can be in the mix here. Or perhaps nothing is.
If he has another episode of ED problems and it happens fairly soon, he needs to see a doc. Wishing you all luck.
Wow, there's a lot in the mix here.
You have a son from a prior relationship that is a bit over a year old.
And you are getting married to a guy not the kiddo's bio father in less than 3 weeks.
How long were you out of your relationship with the other man when you started dating your now-FI???
According to your prior posts on The Knot, you were asking wedding planning questions in January --- your son wasn't even 5 months of age!
So how long have you been involved with this guy???? Clarify this for us...please.
This is moving much much much too fast; I have said this often and I will say it again:
When kids are involved it is positively mandatory to move SLOWLY. You need to know if the guy you are dating is going to be a very very long term boyfriend and you need to know if the guy you are dating has the mettle and character to be involved in your child's life. You also need to know does he even LIKE kids and can he be around a child for a very extended period of time!
Kids also have attachment issues. If I had a small child and I was dating somebody new, I would not bring the bf into the picture to meet the kiddo until about the 9 month mark of dating.
And in this case, since this was an infant and you were fresh out of a relationship?
NO dating at all for at least a year and a half. You need to concentrate on being a mother, not concentrate on finding another man. MUCH too early to date anybody.
I most emphatically would NOT be moving a guy into my life where I was already planning a wedding 5 months after he was born. I most emphatically would not have been dating at that stage of the game, either...but then, I guess that's just me....
BIG mistake to be marrying (and dating) this early into the game: BIG ONE.
You needed to take this much much more slowly.... but I guess what's done is done.
And you are going to TTC immediately after marriage???
You are moving way way way too fast. SLOW DOWN..... wait until your marriage has legs. To me, that's a good 2 years into marriage.
Better yet, postpone the wedding for at least another year. This is moving way too fast here for everyone, the child in particular.
Whoa, sis -- thanks for nothing???
I guess I sure hit a nerve!
Look: if you postred about it, then sex is important to you.
If sex is important to you and you are now more or less glossing over the fact that he might be on his way to erectile problems, what can I tell ya? Perhaps your should not have wasted OUR time posting here.
I was by no means criticizing anything; I gave you blunt and honest advice.
And give my suggestion that he may not want to get married some thought. Psychological symptoms can mirror quite a great many things; the fact that you've got a wedding coming up and you are hell bent to ttc immediately can be a factor here. I am NOT saying it is, I am only saying it might be.
I am also willing to bet that you're going to ignore the problem if it turns out that his ED problems become frequent and many.
Remember this:
Sex, along with money and religion, is one of the biggest things a couple will and can argue over. And when the subject of either one of the 3 rears its head, you see that the subject can get very ugly and confrontational with couples.
If this happens often -- I'd say every 5th time you try to have sex --- he needs a doc's attention and stat.
Lolyshit. You have too much damn time. Creeper.
Low blood pressure will cause erection problems, have you ever tried vacuum therapy? It really works, when vacuum is side on the flaccid penis, it forces blood into the cavities which is what causes an erection. It's a boost to the body's natural process.
I would pass this idea by your doctor first to make sure it's okay, but if he agrees, then pick up a simple device from http://penispumpwarehouse.com you don't need to buy an expensive electric model, the manual pumps work just as good. On the site there is a suggestion page http://penispumpwarehouse.com/most-popular.php for what to purchase depending on the severity of erectile dysfunction. If you wonder why I am offering this specific advice... been there done that.
There is no reason to try to fix this issue on it's own, if the problem is low blood pressure it doesn't matter how turned on he is, nothing will fix the erectile issues unless you intervene somehow. What is also nice about pumps is they don't react with medication which can be an issue. Good luck and I wish you all the best!
This could be a side effect of his medication or a result of the high blood pressure. Meaning it still may not be under control. Definitely needs to see his dr for a check- up.
And you are also right that the one person that replied to your post had no right to criticize your relationship. Sounds like she went and read every post you have ver made here and made assumptions about you.