Trouble in Paradise
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Am I a starry-eyed girl?
I just got a promotion and hubby has 2 job offers on the table: 1 is working from home where we are now, the 2nd is across the country in San Francisco and they will pay for relocation expenses. So... here's our situation: DH and I have lived all over the state, we've finally found an area we like and can see ourselves settling down. We currently don't have kids and we don't own a house. If we are going to move to SF, now is the time to do it. But, our family is here (although I am currently trying to cut off ties with my family--long story). Perhaps it's my romantic notion of living in my dream city while growing our careers and/or running across the country from my family, but, I feel like DH should go for it because I feel like he'll regret it if he doesn't. But, he said he wants to stay where we are so we can buy a house and start a family soon. I guess I'm fine either way, I mean, it's not a bad thing to be employable, but, when he turned down the SF offer, I really got upset...
Re: Am I a starry-eyed girl?
Too bad you guys didn't discuss the SF job. It's a great area to live in -- and there is email, skype, phone calls and many other electronic means to keep in touch with friends and family.
Nestie Bestie with the lovely RockABye
Is San Francisco still on the table?
I am currently living in the area where I grew up, but I was elsewhere on the East Coast for about six year of my adult life. My husband and I are currently trying to move to England because we have the means, the employable skills, and the desire to do it. If we wait too long, we feel like we'll never go.
If you're asking if it's weird to want to go on an adventure with your husband, it's not. My husband is currently in London courting companies and trying to transition there. I'd be doing the same thing if it weren't for minor work complications. We think it'd be a grand ole time together. The idea of buying a home and settling into one neighborhood for the rest of our lives does NOT appeal right now. We know we want to end up in Philadelphia long term, but we're not ready to do it right now. In a few years... until then, let's have fun.
It sounds like the two of you might be in slightly different places in your life right now. You're ready for a great adventure, and he's ready to settle down. I love living in the bay area, but it's true that you might not ever be able to buy a house here - especially one in a good school district. But, if you have some time to play with - or if you reconcile yourselves to renting - it might not be a bad thing.
Sometimes one member of a couple has to be the reasonable one when the other member is being the crazy one. Perhaps if you approach your husband with your eyes wide open - admitting that you see all the drawbacks to moving - you could open up a more productive conversation with him.
You're all right: I'm impulsive and he's the practical one. We don't come from $, in fact, we've both worked our way from poverty, but, we live comfortably now. He thinks the COL in SF is triple that in CT, we don't have a savings and it is a safer bet to stay where we are now. We've had plenty of conversations weighing the pros and cons of both options, he's not regretful of his decision, but, I guess I'm thinking this would be our once in a lifetime chance to do something drastic.
We'll see...
I think you guys need to talk it out. If you're just looking to b!tch, then that's understandable. Otherwise, I would just talk with him. Explain what you are feeling. Do some research and give it to him. Men are more logical than emotional.
Good luck!