Sex & Romance
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Anal sex?
My husband and I have been married for 8 years and we are always looking for new ways to spice up our sex life. He wants to try anal sex but I'm very worried about the pain and effects it will cause my body. I was wanting to know what you think of anal sex and what effects, if any would come from having anal sex?
Re: Anal sex?
We have done it, and the first time was a little bizzare for me, I almost passed out. Don't let that scare you though, it is just really tight and a strange sensation that can't really be described until you experience it, my best advice is go slow and breath through it. We attempted it again and used more lub on me and on the condom and it was much better. As for the effects, I didn't really experience anything that would have stressed me. I would recommend not doing it just after going to the bathroom or if you haven't gone to the bathroom yet for that day.
Much like the post just above me, we did it in the earlier stages of our relationship and decided that it should stay there. Just wasn't something that we felt needed to be carried on.
Lots of lube and SLOW!!!
I had done it with an ex a couple of times, he was very reassuring about it and it wasn't that bad...
with my husband now though, he is too big and I just can't handle it...
although one night when I was totally drunk, I guess I told him to go for it and he did... I didn't know about it until the next day when he told me lol
GL in whatever way you choose!
It's not exactly comfortable the first couple of times. But after you "break it in" it's actually an erotic sensation. First few times, go SLOW, SLOW, SLOW and use lots of lube. Keep lube on hand because he most likely will need to re-apply. I would also recommend having vaginal sex first so he's already naturally lubricated.
Now, before you guys get crazy and put an actual penis in there - have him try a few fingers or anal beads. If you are ok with that sensation, then move onto a vibrator/dildo that is smaller than your husband. If all goes well, then I say graduate to actual penial penetration.
And this works for me, not sure about others... I do it while on my back and he enters from underneath. I like it this way because I have the option of vaginal stimulation and if you are able to orgasm, he can see it, which is a huge turn-on!
Good luck if you go for it. Give it a few tries before you completely say no to it, like I said, it takes a while to get used to it.
Oh - and no weird side effects. But don't do it if you have to go to the bathroom.
So what he really wants is for YOU to try anal? Since it was his idea, he should go first. Lube up a dildo and let him have it.
If he actually thinks it feels good, then you have a different problem.
I always find posts like yours to be quite humerous.
People such as yourself who try to define the sexual norms for every married couple cause far more damage than someone getting a little pleasure from something in their ass!
Edit: i will quote your post in the spits/swallows thread:
As long as it doesn't hurt or injure you, why is it not a turn on to bring sexual ecstasy to your partner?
Why's that?
Yes, I've heard that before too. Can I ask why? Even if it's with only one person?
The only reason I would think Maybe it is a clean up/hygiene issue ? Lets face it..we all know what comes out of that area.
I have to agree with every word of this post. It took us quite awhile to graduate to actual intercourse. Anal sex isn't something we do all the time but, after trying it, I love to have that area stimulated now and can climax through anal sex. Good luck!
It really depends on the partner, the size (this is where it does matter!), the speed, the lube, the position, etc. My advice would be to never ever start immediately with his penis. I recommend him giving you at least one or two orgasms first so that you are relaxed and happy, and use fingers or a toy or something of that nature. Invest in a GOOD oil based lubricant (my fav is called boy butter) If he's using his finger, he shouldnt curve it like he's trying to hit a G spot, just use straight pressure. you have to get those muscles to relax before putting anything bigger in there. If you arent relaxed and you start too soon, it can hurt. If you are relaxed, he should enter slowly at first, and not at all once. a little at a time, and you should tell him if its too much so he can stop and let you get used to it before he goes any further.