Married Life
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Finances with your DH

I was just curious how many of you share bank accounts with your DH vs keep separate accounts. DH and I still have our separate accounts and are going to keep it that way because it works for us. The mortgage and gas for his truck come out of his account, and the rest comes out of mine. It all ends up being even.

Some people have commented on how strange it is that we do it this way because "you're supposed to share accounts when you're married", but we don't really view it as "my money" and "your money". It's "our money in his account" and "our money in my account".

One reason we do it this way is so that if one account was frozen, we'd still have the other. Another reason we keep it this way is so that we only have one ATM card per account. We both only use our ATM's, and I don't want to try and keep track of spending with more than one card. Mainly I just don't see the point in sharing accounts. This may change if I decide to be a SAHM when we have children, but for now it seems to work.

What do you guys do?


Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


Pregnancy Ticker

Re: Finances with your DH

  • We've only been married for a month so right now we still just have our separate accounts. We are planning on opening up a joint account as well and each contributing a certain amount of money into it each month. This joint account would be for rent and bills, groceries, things like that and we would still have our separate accounts for gifts and personal items and whatever else. But like you said, it is all 'our money' just in 2 separate accounts right now so there's no rush on opening up a joint account bc either way, the money is going towards the same things no matter which debit card we pull it out of.
  • We had separate ones while engaged, but are combining to one joint account.  For us, it's just easier if all the bills come out of one account, and it's easier to have all of our income go in to that account, rather than going in to separate accounts and then being transferred to that account.  We also accrue more interest on our savings account by having it all in one places, rather than in our individual accounts.  But that's just what works for us.  I think each couple needs to figure it out on their own - as long as they're contributing equally and all the bills are getting paid, it doesn't matter how many accounts you have.
    ExerciseMilestone Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • We just got married 2 months ago and one of the very first things we did was to get a joint back account. All of our paychecks go into this account and we will be closing out our personal ones soon.

    We have a joint account because we both find it just easier to have one account.  It is also easier because I usually handle the finances and it is just easier to look into one account to see what we got

    Anniversary
  • H and I tried separate accounts for a few months, but it just didn't work for us. We've found it is much, much easier for us to have everything combined.
    image
  • We each have our own accounts, but are joint-owners of each other's accounts if that makes sense.

    My checking account is where all the bills are paid from because I have a checkbook and DH does not. Therefore, he transfers parts of his paycheck to our joint checking each time he gets paid. I sometimes give him a heads up when a bill is about to be paid and we need to have X amount in that account. 

    He still has his own checking/savings to have automatic personal bills come out (i.e. student loans) and has his own 'fun' money for going out with the guys or whatever, and I spend my 'fun' money too. It works for us.
  • We've only had joint accounts since we moved in together, long before we got married.  At that point we had so little money that opening separate accounts when we moved seemed pointless.  We'd have been going back and forth to the bank to transfer money to pay bills all the time.

    It works fine for us. We have friends who have to keep separate accounts or they argue constantly about who's spending what how.  For me, I can't imagine bothering with keeping anything separate.  We've always been the sort to pool it all and pay the communal expenses and then just talk about what else we want/need before we buy it.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • We opened a joint savings account once we got engaged and that's where we put the money we were saving for the wedding. Now we'll be opening a joint checking account for household expenses, and we'll each have a certain percentage of our paychecks automatically go into that account. The rest will go into our individual accounts, which we plan to keep for fun money, gifts, etc.
  • We each have a checking account and savings account- and we also have a joint savings. This is where any excess money goes (like if we get bonuses at work, gifts of money, etc.). We each also put a fixed amount into this account each month. This is the money we use for big purchases, like vacations, new furniture, or, as we are using it right now, a down-payment on a house.

    We keep everything else seperate for the same reasons you and your H do- if one account is frozen, we will have access to the other, also, it would be hard to keep up with two cards, and we would constantly have to make sure we know what the other person has spent out of it, so we wouldn't over-draft. (And having seperate accounts makes it easier to surprise each other with presents.) We like having seperate accounts, but we have also had a lot of people tell us that you're "supposed to" have a joint account once your married. We usually just ignore those comments, it's no one else's business anyway!

  • We opened a savings account in his name only when we moved in together. Mainly so that part of my paycheck could go into the savings and I would still qualify for full student loans for grad school. LITERALLY the day after we got married we added me to the account (I graduated 2 months prior). Now our Savings/Checking is joint and majority of my check goes into it for the mortgage/savings. He puts a large chunk of his income in there for savings also. We also have separate checking accounts and credit cards for spending money, i.e xmas gifts, bday gifts, lunch etc. Anything else comes out of our shared account.

    We are both in finance so we are pretty anal about spending money and bank balances so it works out for us both.


    imageMags's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
     
    TTC 19 months ~Started RE in March 2014~
    DH was not ready for IUI so we waited
    ~Started acupuncture in  May 2014~

    ~~
    BFP 7/6/14~~~EDD 3/14/15~~It's a girl!!~~
  • We have separate checking accounts, only because we are both too lazy to get our automatic payments switched to a new account. Yeah...we are both kind of procrastinators! hahaha. We DID open a joint savings account, which has been awesome when we travel and go out to eat.

    As for bills, we worked out a system when we first started living together (long before engagement and marriage) that works out very well. We pay what's proportionate to what we earn. My DH earns more than double what I make, so he pays most of the rent, and I pay utilities and groceries and a small portion of the rent. We have NEVER had a fight about money, so we don't feel the need to fix what isn't broken. That said, I think we both view all of the money as OUR money, and would absolutely support one another if either of us became unemployed.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imagenyc artist:

    We have NEVER had a fight about money, so we don't feel the need to fix what isn't broken. That said, I think we both view all of the money as OUR money, and would absolutely support one another if either of us became unemployed.

     Exactly. That's how I feel. It's so nice to know I'm not the only one that does it this way. I think it just works well since both currently earn our own income, and probably always will even with children in the picture. 

     


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Pregnancy Ticker
  • great post! We have separate checking accounts and split up the finances. Since he is bad at saving, he pays most household bills and I put my extra money into a joint savings account. Once we have children this will probably change but for right now it works very well.
  • We have had joint checking and savings.  We combined ours after we got engaged.  It works best for us to have it all in one place.
  • My H and I have separate accounts and we are fine with it that way. We each pay half of all bills and we each pay our own bills as well (like my credit card and his e-ring payment). At some point we will get a joint account and put rent, grocery money, and utilities into that. This works well for us, and we don't have to argue about with each other about how we spend our money.
  • HI SGAUTSHCI!

    My hubby and I have been married almost one year now and we share a checking and savings account. Some days it works, some days it doesnt work so well. I worked at three different banks across five years and I have seen others where it works and others where it doesnt work. I think that if it is working for you, and it seems like it is, you should just stick with it. I know, for me and my hubby, it was a huge transition because we were just used to doing things a certain way with our own money before we were married. For example, he loves to take cash out of the ATM, any ATM, therefore he gets a lot of extra fees that add up in the end. I on the other hand, hate incurring extra charges for things that could be avoided. I have to say having a joint account makes it hard at anniversary and Christmas time because you can't just buy out of the account if your signifcant other takes a peak at the balance often.

  • We added his name to my chq and savings accounts when we got married, since i am the person who deals with the money all the money goes in and out of my account. We have seperate investment accounts, and my husband has a savings account in just his name that we use for our business.

  • A month or so before we got married H and I opened up a joint account at his bank because mine was a credit union, I was moving and oddly enough the bank wouldn't come with me.Stick out tongue We now only have our one joint account and that works for us.

     My twin sister and her H have separate accounts and that works for them.

    I saw do what works for you and to heck with other people's opinions. Seriously. Every couple is different and just because you do things differently than other couples doesn't make it wrong.

     

  • imageabbitha7:
    My H and I have separate accounts and we are fine with it that way. We each pay half of all bills and we each pay our own bills as well (like my credit card and his e-ring payment). At some point we will get a joint account and put rent, grocery money, and utilities into that. This works well for us, and we don't have to argue about with each other about how we spend our money.

    You are married and he is STILL paying off the e-ring?  Yikes.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • My DH and I have a joint account for bills and family spending and then each have our own accounts for "fun" money or personal bills.

    We each have our own hobbies, his is restoring vehicles, and we don't want family money to cover those expenses.

  • imagemsditz00:

    imageabbitha7:
    My H and I have separate accounts and we are fine with it that way. We each pay half of all bills and we each pay our own bills as well (like my credit card and his e-ring payment). At some point we will get a joint account and put rent, grocery money, and utilities into that. This works well for us, and we don't have to argue about with each other about how we spend our money.

    You are married and he is STILL paying off the e-ring?  Yikes.

     I think he has one payment left. No big deal! We were only engaged for 7 months.

  • My H and I have been married for five years, and together for seven years, and we still have separate bank accounts we each use for leisure spending, and one joint account where all the $ for the bills are used. We use the same bank, so it easy to transfer the necessary money each month from our separate accounts to the joint account for household expenses.
    FOLLOW MY BLOG/BOOK ABOUT THE NEWLYWED YEARS http://thenotsonewnewlywed.wordpress.com Anniversary
  • Last I checked the only way your bank account gets frozen is if you don't pay your taxes or you get a judgement against you for being in debt, so I'm surprised to see so many planning against that. 

    As for how we do it, we have a joint account and it works for us, but only because we are *completely* on the same page as far as money/spending/savings goes. If one of us was a compulsive spender we'd probably have separate accounts. I don't think it's too odd when others do it.

    Pregnant with #4... It's gonna get real image
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards