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How did you cope?
I know I am probably so whiney regarding this selling our house,, blah, blah, blah. I apologize, I am just such a head-case about this. How did you cope with the waiting between showings and knowing if an offer was or wasn't going to come in?
Especially if you are the type of person that needs to know everything? Here is a brief history of what is going on to refresh...
So we are 4 months in to the home selling process and I have developed extreme anxiety. The waiting for an offer is killing me. So back at the end of July/Beginning of August we had a showing and the person expressed a lot of interest in the house and wanted to put in an offer. Our agent relayed the information.. then we spent 2 weeks waiting for the offer. It drove me nuts, especially since we couldn't agree on terms. The person still needed to sell their current home, which was listed FSBO and was offering less than what we were willing to take at the time (we were only on the market for 1 to 1.5 months at the time and was having great traffic and had no negative feedback).
So here we are again, another couple came through at our open house 2 sundays ago. There were serious buyers (still would need to sell their home), The information relayed between the open house hosting agent and our listing agent made it sound like the only factor that may be holding them up is that our laundry is on the 1st floor and they would like it in the basement. This would be no big deal because a storage room in the basement can easily be converted to a laundry room. So then we hear that the hosting agen is going to take them to see a few more places in our area. After that we hear our house stands out due to the large finished basement with extra kitchen. We wait again, then we hear they are looking at similar homes in a different county (lower taxes). Our agent is relayig information as it comes in to her. The last we hear is that the couple is going away for the weekend and the hosting agent expected a decision on Monday. We wait and wait and there is no decision. At this point the waiting is driving me nuts, I just want to know are they still a viable/potential buyer.
Not only am I driving myself nuts, I am driving my husband nuts and it is negatively affecting our marriage. From the beginning I was hesitant on selling the house (we don't need to move but we would like to move from our townhouse to a single family) and now that we started the process it has consumed me. Help!
Re: How did you cope?
I can sympathize b/c once I start on an endeavor it can be all consuming for me as well. House selling & buying are enormous undertakings and can consume all of your thoughts. So at some point you have to come to the realization that it is out of your control. Really. You can't make people buy your house, you can only get it as "sell ready" (for lack of a better term) as you can & rely on your agent to market it as best he/she can. Its out of your hands. And you have to try as best you can to take a step back & try not to let it matter so much.
Think of it this way - what happens if you don't get a buyer? You said your self that you didn't really need to move. So maybe you put a plan in place that if you don't sell by X date, you take it off the market and wait for awhile. Then you take the pressure off yourself. And you never know, when you least expect it....
How time flies! Caileigh (9), Keira (6) & Eamon (3)
The first time we tried to sell, we were on the market for 3-4 months (August through October or November) with no offers. It was hard and stressful to keep the house looking perfect with a toddler and a dog. And I stay at home, so it wasn't like I could just clean up once in the morning or before bed and have it stay clean all day for potential buyers.
I decided I needed a break, especially with the holidays coming up. We took it off the market and put it back up in the Spring. It sold in less than a week.
It's hard to stay on the market month after month. Taking that break was key to my sanity.
Good luck!
I would ask your agent to stop giving you so much info on potential buyers. Seriously, all the background info sounds like it is making you crazy. The only comments your realtor should be sharing is advice on things you can do to improve your home or improve showings. It is doing you ZERO good to know what these potential buyers are up to. And it would only help if you had competing offers.
I agree with Sheila. This is out of your control. Come up with a list of things you can do or decide how long you'll leave it on the market. Then do your best to let the rest go. It does you no good to spend time worrying about things you have no control over.
If you can't stop worrying, then I would consider a few therapy sessions to help you come up strategies to help you cope or medication. I'm no doctor, but you sound really stressed.
Our house was on the market or 11 months. It sucked. I am a little bit of a control freak and this was the one thing I could not control. There was so much tension between dh and I and with our realtor. We knew it was nobody's fault but by month 7 we were losing hope. Seriously, I get sick just thinking about it.
I really have no advice for you. You can't do anything about it. I'm still bitter about it because it kind of derailed our life plan. If our house sold when we wanted it to sell, we would probably have a 3rd child right now.
I got this off a list online "Moving is the third most stressful event in life, following death and divorce"
I agree that I would tell your agent to stop giving you so much info. You obviously look too much into it, so just tell her to stop. Unless it is an actual written offer, you don't want to know. And unless she is giving you constructive advice on how to make the property more sellable, she needs to back off. It is great she is so on top of it, but it is causing you anxiety. Maybe she can relay the info to your husband and he can share as fit.
And I also agree with Amanda and Amy, that it may be time to consult a professional to deal with the anxiety.
We are going to be putting our house on the market in the spring. I have no delusions that it will sell in a day or a week. If it takes months. so be it. We are actually selling two properties, so it is double the fun. Now my husband on the other hand will drive me INSANE, I already know it.
Thank you for letting me vent my frustrations out and providing me with some great ideas. I definitely think I am only going to as for constructive feedback that would help sell the house and not want to know unless an offer is in hand.
I don't know what happened to me, I use to be able to handle stress and go with the flow in the past. I was the type of girl that was planning a wedding, getting married, and studying for her comprehensive exam for her Ph.D. and then defending her dissertation a few days before her due date with her 1st kid to go in to labor the next day. What happened to me?