Politics & Current Events
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

A Bigger Problem. What is it?

I laid awake a long time last night thinking of the parents whose children are gone. Two weeks before Christmas, all probably believed in Santa, their parents probably already had their gifts bought and maybe even wrapped. So gut-wrenching.

I've also been examining my perspective on guns and ownership of them. Several things...

All the gun control advocates aren't incorrect in their views. Fewer guns may indeed reduce the number of shootings and/or the number of fatalities.

However, I think and I know others think this too, that the violence our nation is seeing is a symptom of a deeper, bigger problem that we have as a culture that cannot just be legislated away with more and stricter controls on purchase, carry and ownership. I wish it were that simple, because if I thought it would work, I'd agree that it was a good move. You cannot legislate away crazy and depraved. Tossing red tape and money at something isn't going to fix the underlying problem.

So, Western European nations, with which we like to compare ourselves, emulate, and desire to be more like, have fewer violent acts then the U.S.. Why?

I think we have a problem here that is uniquely American and disgustedly so. There is something in our culture that has caused people to crave lust, violence, and other vices. And, to my knowledge, Western European nations just don't have this sort of population.

What has changed so greatly in our nation in the past two decades to create such monsters?

If we can answer that question, I think we can learn more about a TRUE solution, not just a band-aid masking a systemic issue.

Any ideas?

Re: A Bigger Problem. What is it?

  • I honestly think the problem has less to do with guns, and more to do with the way we treat the mentally ill in our society. We do not have a replacement for the institutions of old, which while inhumane, helped to protect us from some of the crazies. We also allow freedom of speech, while wonderful, allows people with hate in their hearts to congregate and spew their garbage with no penalty. Finally, we have many first person shooter games (it doesn't escape me how young many of these people are) and they teach people who already have difficulty with reality that they will be rewarded for shooting and killing people. If someone goes hunting with a real gun the animal dies, if you shoot someone on a video game you get points for it. ( I am certainly not saying all games are bad, but many are). There are probably other points that escape me as this is not my area of expertise, but it seems to me we need to be more strict with people who have an externalizing mental illness. 
  • imageMKbutterly:
    I honestly think the problem has less to do with guns, and more to do with the way we treat the mentally ill in our society. We do not have a replacement for the institutions of old, which while inhumane, helped to protect us from some of the crazies. We also allow freedom of speech, while wonderful, allows people with hate in their hearts to congregate and spew their garbage with no penalty. Finally, we have many first person shooter games (it doesn't escape me how young many of these people are) and they teach people who already have difficulty with reality that they will be rewarded for shooting and killing people. If someone goes hunting with a real gun the animal dies, if you shoot someone on a video game you get points for it. ( I am certainly not saying all games are bad, but many are). There are probably other points that escape me as this is not my area of expertise, but it seems to me we need to be more strict with people who have an externalizing mental illness. 

    I think you have identified three valid points...mentally ill, free speech even for hatred, and video games.

    My question is: are there more mentally ill people these days? It seems like it. And, it seems like real treatment and facilities for these people isn't happening, pill popping has become the answer. So what is causing this epidemic of increased mentally ill, depressed, etc.? This seems very unique to our country.

  • I think there are some mental illnesses that have no successful treatment. Not to mention, many people with mental illness stop taking their medication. If they are outside an institution there is no way to force a person to take their medication, because the person has the right to be free, until they have already acted upon their violent impulses. 
  • As I turned on the television this morning, I shut it off soon after.  I longed for the day when media wasn't front and center in EVERYTHING we do. I pictured myself as a child...playing a board game with my family, going out for dinner on special occasion, cooking with Mom in the kitchen and creating something, tossing a ball with Dad in the backyard or helping him and my brother split wood out back.

    Sit at a restaurant and watch a family with children.  Watch as they scroll endlessly on their smart phones.  Go to the movies, the bookstore, the diner, cafe, museum and watch the same thing. Listen to the silence as they're all there but not really there together at all. Look back over the past 26 hours and recall how many stories were released that were incorrect, damaging to something or someone and realize how huge media has become in our lives and look beyond that to see that that is not a very good thing. I truly believe monsters like the one who took innocent lives yesterday thrive off this new form (as horrific as it may be) of celebrity. Someone else on this board recently said something similar.  These people are glorified in some sick way. Yes, they are very ill; that combined with this type of media soaked society is causing more damage to all of us and our children than ever before.  I fear for the future of our children as I see more of this happening if nothing changes.  As for the answer...I have no idea what that is. 

  • There are violent, hateful people in every culture. America is unique in that it is very young, very divided, very large, and very free. We don't take care of our sick or mentally ill, we don't take good care of our poor, we hate those that are different than us, but we're ALL different than us. We're a huge mix of races, cultures, privileges, prejudices, fears. 

    Part of me thinks that there will always be some sort of violence in a culture that values money over life.

    The problem with not restricting gun production, selling, and buying, is that for now, guns are everywhere. They are rampant. They are like a plague. So when someone wants to hurt a lot of people, quickly, the access is IMMEDIATE. Steal a gun, buy a gun, get a gun and shoot up a school, it happens so quickly.

    Our responsibility is to stop fighting false wars, like the war on drugs, or the wars in the Middle East, and to start fighting the wars that count: a war on poverty, a war on violence, a war on poor physical and mental health care.  

    Jack Anderson 2.28.10 Our amazing little man. image
  • imageascd:

    As I turned on the television this morning, I shut it off soon after.  I longed for the day when media wasn't front and center in EVERYTHING we do. I pictured myself as a child...playing a board game with my family, going out for dinner on special occasion, cooking with Mom in the kitchen and creating something, tossing a ball with Dad in the backyard or helping him and my brother split wood out back.

    Sit at a restaurant and watch a family with children.  Watch as they scroll endlessly on their smart phones.  Go to the movies, the bookstore, the diner, cafe, museum and watch the same thing. Listen to the silence as they're all there but not really there together at all. Look back over the past 26 hours and recall how many stories were released that were incorrect, damaging to something or someone and realize how huge media has become in our lives and look beyond that to see that that is not a very good thing. I truly believe monsters like the one who took innocent lives yesterday thrive off this new form (as horrific as it may be) of celebrity. Someone else on this board recently said something similar.  These people are glorified in some sick way. Yes, they are very ill; that combined with this type of media soaked society is causing more damage to all of us and our children than ever before.  I fear for the future of our children as I see more of this happening if nothing changes.  As for the answer...I have no idea what that is. 

    I agree with you. Bolded especially. I guess the shooter's brother was accused of being involved in the shooting in some way, the media published this false information...his reputation is probably screwed. The shooter's father found out about the shooting in his driveway when a reporter asked him about it; he had not yet heard anything.

    The media definitely glorifies things. All the op-ed pieces, the photos to scroll through, the "URGENT," "BREAKING NEWS." They are probably running around trying to get all the pics and biographical information together to create a panorama of the lost (memoriums are important, but I'm commenting on the veracity with which the media soaks this all up).

    Several years ago, DH and I were in Colonial Williamsburg eating lunch in one of the "in character" restaurants. Across from us was a table of kids...all electronified, not speaking to one another or their parents. The waiter, in character and dress began asking them, "What are these odd tools you have here? I have not seen these sort before" They kids, having no interactive skills whatsoever, were like, "Duh. Our cell phones." They did not "get" that he was joking with them, implying that they should put the phones away. Kidsa re too connected. We do need to unplug, rest, and unwind in non-electronic ways.

    Personally, I also think this somewhat ties into the break-down of tradition in our country...family structure, religion, all that "uncool" stuff that's "antiquated." Despite religion's problems, it does/can serve a good purpose in corralling many peoples' skewed behaviors. Religion does curb excesses many times. It is rigid, but it helps hold people to a higher standard of morality. It isn't without its own flaws, but I think religion and adherence to it, even a little, sets some definitive boundaries that many people are uncomfortable breaking whether they believe in God or not. When behaving outside the norm isn't acceptable, fewer people push the envelope and act in defiance.

    We don't really have a norm in our country any more...it's whatever, whenever, however, and with whomever you want (as long as it isn't hurting anybody else). But, I think this playing fast and loose with every aspect of life, IS hurting other people...long-term or indirectly.

    In addition, I also think we have what I call a "culture of death." When skulls and cross bones become acceptable for kids' clothing and accessories, there's a message there. Skulls have always represented death, dying, danger and disease. The Nazis in the death camps had mini skulls on their hats. Poison bottles are marked with skulls. Now, a toddler can wear them on her skirt.

    I know some of you will say that I'm overreacting, but these are little subliminal messages that get registered in peoples' brains as being okay. Death is okay. It is cool and cartoony, colorful and trendy. We are becoming desensitized to death.

  • I agree that the source of this kind of violence is cultural.  America ignores the strongest drivers of violence, namely our socioeconomic disparities in education, health care, and income.

    But that is precisely why I'm a supporter of gun control.  

    I would LOVE to change our culture so that we didn't glorify violence, ignore mental health problems, and let everyone in America safely own a gun.  But changing a culture is virtually impossible.  It's just not going to happen, and even if it did, it would take a generation to see results.

     Making guns harder to get and not selling the most dangerous types is much more feasible than changing the collective psyche of 200 million people.   

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageNastyAnnie:

    There are violent, hateful people in every culture. America is unique in that it is very young, very divided, very large, and very free. We don't take care of our sick or mentally ill, we don't take good care of our poor, we hate those that are different than us, but we're ALL different than us. We're a huge mix of races, cultures, privileges, prejudices, fears. 

    Part of me thinks that there will always be some sort of violence in a culture that values money over life.

    The problem with not restricting gun production, selling, and buying, is that for now, guns are everywhere. They are rampant. They are like a plague. So when someone wants to hurt a lot of people, quickly, the access is IMMEDIATE. Steal a gun, buy a gun, get a gun and shoot up a school, it happens so quickly.

    Our responsibility is to stop fighting false wars, like the war on drugs, or the wars in the Middle East, and to start fighting the wars that count: a war on poverty, a war on violence, a war on poor physical and mental health care.  

    What she said.

    ILY, NA. 

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I love you too CG. 

     

    I hate what is happening to us. 

    Jack Anderson 2.28.10 Our amazing little man. image
  •  Look back over the past 26 hours and recall how many stories were released that were incorrect, damaging to something or someone and realize how huge media has become in our lives and look beyond that to see that that is not a very good thing.

    This is what floored me.

    Our local news station, on Friday and on Saturday, had: reports of a second gunman, that somebody was found in a woods nearby shouting "I did not do it," reports that the gunman broke in, reports that the gunman was buzzed in and no intrusion and then of course, there was his mom was a teacher, then a teacher's aide, then a substitute and then a kindergarten teacher...and then somebody reported she was never a teacher at all (this was a reference to her exH's 2nd wife)

    And then there was the amazing way how both sons' names were mixed up. They nabbed that fella in Hoboken and wow, what a mess that was....a big one.

    I still wonder wht else has gotten into the mix that is erroneous.

    Nope: We do not take care of our mentally ill or those who are needy. We take care of nobody "but ourselves."

    Somewhere along the line, something got into the mix where the caring factor seemed to fall away into ruin.

    And after every incident it's "oh we have to do something about these type of incidents" and then it seems to get lost in translation.

    When will we learn?

     

Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards