There were only 2 replies, mine and another Nestie's ---
Here is the deal: she is 20 and wants to move in with a boyfriend. Guy is a college grad, can't find a job in his major field...and he's in debt.
He has suggested they do it with the help of roommates. The DDer thinks that's a no go; she vants to be alone vith him.
That ain't her problem: her problem is his debt -- and if there is debt other than that of his student loan, I suggest she rethink this guy.
If he is pissing up money now, he always will.
And oh yeah, she was concerned he was so distant lately...which is why she posted.
Distant? Who cares about distant --- she overlooked the fact he is in a lot of debt.
I suggested that she ask him straight away how he acquired the debt and how much debt exactly he has. And if he won't fess up, run like hell right away.
Re: 'Tis the season to drop things -- I see another DD
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
We tried. And we were not nasty about it --- if he can't pull his weight financially now, how is he going to do it, even with roommates??
That's not going to eradicate the fact that he can't save and spend money wisely.
I actually disagree. He's twenty, just out of college and racked up a lot of debt in a time period when he didn't have an income. I'm sure it was on stupid stuff that doesn't matter in the long run, but plenty of people learn from their mistakes. Just because he's irresponsible now doesn't mean he always will be - and I'm speaking from personal experience.
I also wouldn't be in the habit of laying my finances out there for a move-in girlfriend. Fiance? Future partner in life? Person whose finances would be tied to mine forever? Absolutely. But boyfriend? Meh. I would want to know that he could pay rent every. single. month. but I don't think he's under any obligation to disclose every bit of his debt to me.
What would matter MOST to me was that he was taking the steps to take responsibility for the debt, not the fact that he has it. Get a job waiting tables if you must, but start paying it off immediately and actively protect yourself from incurring any more. If boyfriend is not interested in that, then I think boyfriend has serious problems and breaking up with him is definitely in order.
There is a guy I know who graduated 2 years ago.Major was education. He can't find a full time teaching job. So he's working as an aide minus benefits.
You do what you have to do. And you pay off what debt you owe.
20 20 or some other news program did a profile about college kids and credit card debt. This was a very long time ago; they talked about how kids rack up credit very easily and how easy it is to get a card during college years.
I blame some of it on reckless youth and a lot of it on parents who don't teach kids how to save a dollar.