Pittsburgh Nesties
MandyMilller
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Did anyone nurse to age 2?
Wes turns 2 in a few weeks, and he's still nursing twice a day (at wake-up and bed time). He's very determined to nurse at these two times and not showing any obvious signs of changing his mind in the next month. I have no urgent reason to wean him, but I'm just sort of wondering where to go from here. Lanna self weaned right at 13 months, so I'm deep into uncharted territory.
Again, it's not like I'm going to cut him off next week, but I just want to be careful that I don't end up making this harder on both of us (like it was when I had to force Lanna off the paci at age 4)!
How did you approach nursing past 2 if you made it that far?
Re: Did anyone nurse to age 2?
Heather nursed to 22 months. She stopped when I entered the second trimester of my pregnancy with Todd. So getting pregnant is one way to wean. :-)
Todd weaned right around his 3rd birthday. He went through some wicked separation anxiety from 15-21 months, so there was no way to wean him during that period. By his second birthday, he had finally started sleeping through the night and was night weaned. For the most part from age 2-3, he nursed twice a day. Occassionally we would add a short weekend afternoon session if he was tired or injured, but for the most part it was 1-2 sessions a day for that whole year. My thought was as long as we were both happy with our nursing relationship, then there was no reason to change it. And as soon as one of us needing to make a change, we would take it one step at a time.
I don't remember the exact timing, but after he turned 2 1/2, the morning session was getting annoying. He would nurse for a minute and then watch TV, and then get annoyed if I put my shirt back down. Then he would nurse for another minute and then go back to the TV (it was behind him, so he had to arch his back to see it...). Rinse and repeat for 20 minutes. It made the morning annoying and it seemed to be more about the habit than the milk or the comfort.
On the weekend, DH would get up with Todd and distract him while I slept, so it became clear that we could wean off that session and since it was making me cranky in the morning, it was time. I think we used the winter break to make it final. The strangeness of our schedule plus the mornings that I went to work before he woke up sealed the deal without too much trauma. He asked a few times in january and I just told him that we didn't nurse in the morning anymore, but that he could nurse again at bedtime.
A month or two later, we made a change to bedtime so that nursing was no longer the last thing before sleep. Todd was no longer falling asleep nursing and I wanted to break the immediate association. We also started altering nights, so that half the time DH would rock him to sleep after nursing and books. I also started talking about cuddling at bedtime and that we would be done with the nursing at 3. (I was not unhappy to be nursing him, it just didn't feel like it was providing any more benefit than cuddling could, and I was ready to be done.) I started doing this a couple months before his birthday. Had there been huge protests on his part, I would have backed off, but he seemed okay with the plan.
He didn't nurse the week leading up to his birthday - a combo of busy nights, not offering and daddy putting him to bed. He actually nursed a few nights the following week while we were on a cruise because he couldn't seem to relax and needed the comfort. When we returned home, I offered him cuddles at bedtime instead and there was little protest.
That's how it went for us. Just like potty training, pacifiers, eating and other transitions, it will certainly vary from kid to kid, but I have zero regrets that we nursed past his second birthday. I'm happy to help with advice in the future, if you are ready to wean before he is. Based on how defiant 3-year olds can be (and our potty experiences), my suggestion would be to try to wean by his 3rd birthday or be prepared to go until he's 4. I'm sure it's not impossible to wean a 3-year old...but it seems to me that that would be the most challenging time-frame in which to try if the kid wasn't ready.
Sorry for the novel. Hope that helps!
Thanks, Amy! I definitely am not interested in getting PG, so I'll try some of your other suggestions
I was actually already thinking I need to start taking him somewhere else to nurse in the mornings. Currently I sit in a rocker in his dark room, but with nothing to distract him that could go on forever! I tried getting DH to get up with him a few times over Xmas break, but Wes was having none of it. And he'll let H put him down for naps, but not bedtime. Which I take it is a nursing thing, b/c he doesn't nurse at naps.
He will let DH put him down to sleep w/ no problem when I'm out at night, but if I'm there he wants me and he wants to nurse. I'm fine with it for now, but I would like him to at least get to the point where he'll accept DH instead of me in the mornings b/c he's an early riser and I haven't slept in since he was born! And you understood perfectly what I was saying about letting it go on too long and entering the 3yo challenging timeframe. I hope to tackle a lot of things in the next year (like potty training too), b/c I find 3yo's to be impossible!!