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Lack of Confidence
Hi Ladies,
I'm new to this...first time post. Anyways, I'm actually really happy with my boyfriend and I's sex life...the only thing is, I feel like I don't initiate enough. When he engages, I'm always happy to have sex with him. The only thing is, I feel as though I'm second guessing myself a lot. Like early mornings when we don't have anywhere to be, I just lay in bed and never wake him up with any sort of touching or anything. Not even when I know we are both awake and just enjoying the morning in one another's arms. There are things I want to do, and I think about doing them, like surprising him with oral when he least expects it, but that is all I do. I just think about doing it, and never follow through. I don't know what my deal is. He loves, me, I love him, he finds me beautiful and sexy and compliments me on a regular basis. I too find him sexy and desirable as hell. I'm not bashful around him, we shower together regularly and we talk all the time about everything. I don't understand where my mental hang up is. I'm not that young (I'll be 28 this year), and he is 37, so we are both mature adults that have had previous serious relationships before we were together. And its not like I don't know what I'm doing. When we have foreplay, I have no problem pleasuring him, I just have a weird issue of getting the ball rolling.
I have a feeling this is probably one of those things that I will just have to get over, and next time I have a thought of initiating something, I should just do it. I guess what I'm wondering is if anyone else has had this kind of mental hang up, and how they dealt with it. Any help would be appreciated.
Thanks!
Re: Lack of Confidence
I'm the same way a lot of the time and I have no idea why. I don't have a religious or abuse angle to connect to it. I'm got very healthy views on sex in general. But I often think about things and then wuss out and don't actually do them.
I think you just do it. When I have, it's always worked out well
And the more I power through and have a positive result, the easier it is next time.
So...did you? Inquiring minds want to know...
I'm also with Kimbus22, did you follow through??
You could just be nervous about what his reaction will be if you just wake him up with morning head or something. Just go for it one day and break down that mental wall. It gets easier every time.
P.S. even if he says no, I promise he won't be mad at you for trying.