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Feeling Guilty
Some background: My husband and have been married for a little over a month and we are closing on our new home in about a month. There has been a lot of transition in the past couple of years, including a move across the country for his career. We have been together for about 5 years total and our relationship is stable. My husband is supportive, responsible and kind. We get along well and we are financially stable.
We are both 33 years old and it seems like the time is coming to make a firm decision on when we will start a family. The problem is, I am feeling put off by the idea of having a baby and I feel so guilty about it. I am thinking that with the recent wedding and the move, I just feel unsettled and it is making me feel ambivalent about adding a baby right now. Several people I know have recently announced that they are expecting, and while I am happy for them, I am finding myself cringing at the thought of being pregnant. I feel like a selfish person for feeling this way. When I think about why I might feel this way it feels worse...I like our life the way it is. Is it horrible to feel this way? I worry that I will wait too long to feel better about the idea of having a baby and that we will have problems conceiving. I know it is early in our marriage to expect to want to try for a baby, but times is flying and it is something that we need to plan for.
My husband I and talked about it and bless his heart...he says we can do whatever makes me comfortable BUT I still feel awful. I don't want to try to get pregnant out of guilt and fear that I will regret not trying to have a baby sooner. I just always thought that the decision to try to become a mother would come more naturally to me.
Re: Feeling Guilty
I think your feelings are very common. There are many women for whom the decision to become a mother doesn't come so "naturally", but they may be reluctant to speak about it because, unfortunately, sexism is still extremely pervasive and there is
You should always wait if one person in a relationship is unsure. You might be ready in 6 months or 2 years, you just don't know. Second you can have issues at any age. What my ticker doesn't say is I was 25 when DS was born, I'm 30 and have lost 5 pre
Baby Boy loved for 15 weeks, 5/31/11
Baby Girl loved for 16.5 weeks. 3/1/12
You shouldnt feel guily at all...you have a lot of things going on right now and can lead to a lot of stress and confusion. I would personally wait until things have settled down before making decision on whether to have children or not. There are tons
I feel every marriage benefits from the no kids, have sex whenever, walk around naked and have no restrictions to go on vacation in a moments notice period. These are the times/ moments that get you through the tough times. Not everyone will agree but
I have been married for almost 5 years, and my son will be 4 in August. We closed on our house, moved, got married, and had our (preemie) son all in the same year. I don't think you should feel guilty at all for wanting to take some time to
I'm in the same boat as shayna0182, got married, sold a house got pregnant and had a premature baby all in one year. Babies are wonderful, when you're ready. Give yourself time to relax, enjoy your husband and build up your financial security.
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