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I also have a friend vent!
In January (a week after I found out I was pregnant) my bridesmaids and I were planning a girls weekend trip for April. They wanted to go to Vegas and since it was a ridiculously short and expensive weekend ($1000 for 2 nights) I told them I couldn't go. It was too early to tell them the other reason was that I was expecting. So we started planning going to a couple different locations before it ultimately fizzled and no one talked about getting together. Our trip was planned for this past weekend and I just found out that 2 of the girls decided to get together by themselves and go to Chicago without inviting the rest of us. I could've traveled to Chicago! They are not big partiers so its not like they were bar hopping or out drinking, all they did was eat and shop. Ummmm pregnant people can do that too!! The kicker is, these two MET at my wedding only 7 months ago!! They were my bridesmaids, not bff's or anything. The one friend told the other friend that also wasn't invited that they were "not planning on telling me about this" I'm assuming because they knew I would be pissed, which I am! The only connection these girls have to each other is me, I'm very upset and confused why I wasn't invited when this was suppose to be our weekend to get together! I feel like I'm being punished for being pregnant, like they assumed I couldn't go because of it, when really they made that choice for me by not inviting me! I'm so agitated and frustrated, I have known all of these girls for the better part of my life. Also, we are in our 30's which makes this seem even more childish! Were all married, and all but one with kids. I just don't get it. I don't like confrontations but I really feel like maybe I should say something but I know it will get thrown in my face that I'm just throwing an immature fit. Gah. I cant win. Any thoughts? Should I say something??
Re: I also have a friend vent!
You are throwing an immature fit.
They didn't want you to go, if they did they would have invited you pregnant/poor or not.
Maybe you should look at this as you are so awesome at picking out friends that they all hit it off with each
I don't see the big deal in them becoming friends and wanting to go on a trip without you. I have plenty of friends that I met through other friends and we do things separately. I don't see a reason to make a big deal of it and possibl
No, don't say anything. If they were your only 2 BMs and you were the ONLY person no included, I'd understand being upset. But as the two of them became friends and decided to get together for a weekend - this really doesn't have to do w/ y
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
"The only connection these girls have to each other is me"
That sounds extremely narcissistic. Just because you're the reason they met
we are in our 30's which makes this seem even more childish!
Well, you are right that this is childish. Thing is, you're the one being childish. Think about it - they offered up plans, you declined, other plans fizzled
Well, if you're all in your 30s, they probably didn't realize that they needed written permission from you to spend time together as friend outside of something relating to your wedding.
Or, if they really said "We don't want the bride to know" (
I'm more than willing to start validating people's ideas when they start having ideas worth validating
All I got out of this was "Waaah my friends did something without me!".
They're allowed to do things without you.
You are the one being childish in this situation. Keep this attitude up and you will lose them ( and others ) as friends.
Listen, they became quick friends and wanted to go on a trip just the two of them. That is perfectly fine and th
I agree that this seems like an immature way of handling it...but all I did was vent my frustrations out on this post. I didn't tell anyone off or even talk about this to anyone else. This helped me get perspective and get out of
But why would they be obligated to ask you, or the other BMs to go along on a trip they planned for themselves? I'm not getting why you think the invitation should have been extended.
I go on vacation pretty much every year. Never once has
I'm more than willing to start validating people's ideas when they start having ideas worth validating
Unless they came back talking about what a great time they had at your bachelorette party, they obviously didn't feel like this was a "girls trip" for you and the rest of your BMs. If they had felt that way, they would have actually invited you and/or
I'm more than willing to start validating people's ideas when they start having ideas worth validating
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10