Is it weird?

WillyH19

I receive a Mother's Day card from my FIL and his wife.  This year is the third year in a row I have received one. The first year, the note from them said "We know someday you will be a wondeful mother." Last year, it said something along the lines of "maybe next year you will have something tangible to celebrate" and this year's card mentioned something about being a mother-to-be. Now, we are not even remotely thinking about having a baby as of right now. My FIL will be celebrating is 80th birthday on our anniversary. While I understand he wants to be around for us having a baby, is it weird that he sends these cards?

goatlady12

Yes, this is totally weird and invasive.  But I think it's just normal for at least one IL to be that way!  Lol!  Luckily it's just a card so you can toss it out and ignore it.  Does he ask about it ever, or is this the only thing you ever hear/see on the child topic?  Hopefully he's not pushy in person, that always gets awkward! 

WillyH19

Seipel12:

Yes, this is totally weird and invasive.  But I think it's just normal for at least one IL to be that way!  Lol!  Luckily it's just a card so you can toss it out and ignore it.  Does he ask about it ever, or is this the only thing you ever hear/see on the child topic?  Hopefully he's not pushy in person, that always gets awkward! 

Thank you for validaitng me! H seems unconcerned by all of it chalking it up to his dad being older. He asks about it every.single.time we talk to or see them. Overly pushy and involved. H chalks it up to his age, and I feel bad that he may never get to meet a child of ours. But, it still irks me.

lehc723

Ugh, yes, super weird. Honestly, he's your FIL and older so I can't say if I were in your shoes that I'd say something about it, but it's so weird! 

xxjen015

I agree that it's weird...I've heard of people being wished a Happy Mother's Day if actually pregnant...or if they have furbabies...but this sounds just a little weird. My MIL is constantly asking when we'll have babies and threatens (not seriously!) to mess with my birth control. She's afraid of dying (she's a 6 year breast cancer survivor and is totally in remission...there haven't been any signs that it's coming back, but she's paranoid), and so she wants one of her kids to pop out a baby. Considering we're the married couple, we're the first choice. SIL is 3 years younger and in a serious relationship, but we're all convinced that he's gay...so we really want to discourage that!! What does your H say about these cards?

sjs1013

I think that it is weird, but it probably has a lot to do with your FIL's age.  Next time he mentions it, say something along the lines of wanting to enjoy your marriage with just the two of you for a while.  Leave it at that.

minionlover

It is definitely strange.  I am thinking, like some of the others, that it's because of his age.  I do think that if you are really uncomfortable with it that your DH should gently say something to his father. 

brainybrunette

Yes, I think it's weird and it's slightly inappropriate. I understand that your FIL is older, but I think it's a passive aggressive way to encourage you to start a family before you're ready. I would ask DH to talk to him and say that you are not ready to start a family right now.