This board is soo me

dancevickidance

I am completely sick and tired of being the only one of my friends not pregnant. What sickens me more? I'm the only one in a relationship, let alone married. All these girls got pregnant and are completely alone now, and I get crap from them because I have no kids and am married. Just needed to vent, I guess.

BeckyOff

Ha!

My mom's sister gives my mom a hard time because my siblings and i are waiting too long to have kids.  Meanwhile my aunt's kids mostly got pregnant in high school.  It's so weird that anybody would wait until after they've been married for a bit. 

dancingphalanges

I totally know what you mean.  All of my siblings got pregnant before 20 (and all before marriage) so I guess my parents expected the same out of me.  It seems like just about everyone I graduated high school with has children now.  DH and I are just now approaching a year of marriage, and there is still so much that we want to do, both as a couple and individually, so children are not in our immediate future.  Both my mom and MIL have grandchildren already, but I guess they can't stand not having one more.  However, interestingly enough, most of the chatter about when we're going to have children comes from complete strangers.

dancevickidance

I work at a bank, and I have people asking me when I'm gonna have a kid. I'm like, "first off, I don't know you. Second off, how do you know I'm suddenly married, you've never been here before. Third, none of your damn business."

I had a woman YELL at me saying that I'm robotic because I want to have a stable job, car, etc. in order, then buy a house and then have kids. I was told it's "more respectable to get pregnant and then married, rather than married then get pregnant," and that I'm "robotic."

I was actually warned two things though, Alex(my husband)'s grandmother will be harassing me to have kids, since his sister has two toddlers right now. Also, that if I haven't popped out a kid, and I'm not swollen ready to pop one out, by my one year anniversary, then people will be asking us what's wrong with our marriage.

 

I don't understand why people are so hell bent on rushing through life. Don't get me wrong, I do want kids and all. It's just that once you have them, you pretty much through away the life you knew. And I'm having fun now. I'm at a point in life where I feel like I might resent the pregnancy and not enjoy it, for lack of better terms. And that's not fair. I'm young. I can wait until I'm completely ready for it, and then appreciate it for what it really is.

burybuck0489

dancevickidance:

I work at a bank, and I have people asking me when I'm gonna have a kid. I'm like, "first off, I don't know you. Second off, how do you know I'm suddenly married, you've never been here before. Third, none of your damn business."

I had a woman YELL at me saying that I'm robotic because I want to have a stable job, car, etc. in order, then buy a house and then have kids. I was told it's "more respectable to get pregnant and then married, rather than married then get pregnant," and that I'm "robotic."

I was actually warned two things though, Alex(my husband)'s grandmother will be harassing me to have kids, since his sister has two toddlers right now. Also, that if I haven't popped out a kid, and I'm not swollen ready to pop one out, by my one year anniversary, then people will be asking us what's wrong with our marriage.

 

I don't understand why people are so hell bent on rushing through life. Don't get me wrong, I do want kids and all. It's just that once you have them, you pretty much through away the life you knew. And I'm having fun now. I'm at a point in life where I feel like I might resent the pregnancy and not enjoy it, for lack of better terms. And that's not fair. I'm young. I can wait until I'm completely ready for it, and then appreciate it for what it really is.

 Thank you big time!!!! reading this entire post has totally helped me in how i have been feeling lately. I have felt an extreme amount of pressure and not even from family (thank goodness) But our friends. Reading this helped. Again, thankyou

Rainzzzy

I am being harassed by my Mom/Aunts. Interestingly enough my friends either don't have kids, or have young children and nod sympathetically when I mention being undecided. I haven't had a friend with kids try to talk me into having them, which makes me even more convinved to not have them lol! Perhaps this is because their children are young enough that the parents are still sleep deprived and suffering greatly through tantrums and daycare expenses? If their kids were older perhaps they would give different advice.