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Food addiction?
My husband and I have been married for about 9 months and been together almost 4 years. He's always have issues with food and I don't' know how to handle it. For example, I woke up this morning to discover he finished off all of last nights dinner left overs, a whole big bag of gummy bears, and downed a bunch of chips and salsa. I've tried to express my concern on this, but I have a tendency to scold and don't know how to approach it in a more positive manner. He's slightly overweight (not in his ideal place right now is what he says), but has struggle with his weight in the past. I know he wants to be healthy, we just need to get over this hurtle. He knows what he is doing isn't great and that he shouldn't. He says he's working on it, but it happens all the time. He's battled problems with depression and is on medication for it and seeing someone and that seems to be helping, but the food issue isn't getting resolved. Any advice? What can I do to help him? Is this a lack of motivation? Any positive suggestions or recommendations I'd love to hear.
Re: Food addiction?
He needs to mention his eating habits to his mental health professional.
He could be overindulging, binge eating (and possibly purging) or maybe he even has a thyroid problem in the making or (a long shot) a condition called pica.
For his own sake he needs to tell his mental health professional. This needs to be checked out and treated -- the pica is treatable.:) GL.
I've struggled with binge eating disorder, and unfortunately you can't MAKE your husband do anything about this, he has to WANT to do it himself. Approach it as an open dialogue, not a lecture. You can let him know you're concerned and open it up for him to talk about and perhaps have a few good suggestions for how to deal with it if he asks for help.
Goodluck!
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Yikes. Food is such a touchy subject. It would probably be better if someone else helped him, otherwise you'll just feel like his mom or coach or something.
I think all you can do is tell him you're concerned, and you'd like him to get some help with it. Then it's up to him. Trying to change him or motivate him yourself will probably just create bad feelings and an unhealthy dynamic between you. Good luck!
So, for 4 years it wasn't an issue that concerned you enough to take care of it before you married him....now you are married and its a huge concern?
If HE is concerned let him talk to his Dr. about it.
Im sure he is glad he married his mom.
I have a really messed up relationship with food. While I'm eating one thing, I'm thinking about what I'm going to eat next. The amount of time I spend thinking about food is crazy. I have to work every day to keep the amount I eat in check. If someone else tries to control what I eat, it does not go well. First off, it pisses me off. I feel like I'm being controlled and being treated like a child. The most typical reaction for me is to rebel.
No one else can control your husband's food choices. My guess is the more you try to control it, the worse it's going to get. He has to realize that this is a problem and he has to want to do something about it. Nothing you say or do is going to change it or make those realizations come faster.
What may be helpful though is creating a safe food environment. We don't keep any junk food in our house. If it's not here, we can't eat it. If we make any desserts, we make something that is 2 servings. If there is more, I can't resist having it over and over until it's gone. I snack a decent amount so I always have healthy snacks prepared. If I over eat veggies or have 1 too many protein bars, BFD. But again, this a realization and choice that your husband has to make.
I'm with Kuus on this one...
The example you posted does not sound that bad to me. I probably have a couple of nights each month where I would eat like that, or worse.....maybe a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's and a large dinner, whatever. The amount of food you listed isn't that huge, imo.
Is he overeating all the time? You say he isn't very overweight. He is on medication and in counseling, doesn't sound like a huge issue to me, and it's being addressed.
It would really make me mad if my spouse got on my case about what I ate, and it would likely backfire...
You just gave me a big, fat headache! Leave him alone!