Sex & Romance
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Maturation please help
I'm 39 m my wife has some problem and we can't have sex.i been trying to masturbatr but I can seem get myself off any ideas
Re: Maturation please help
First off, change the title of this post to something like "Masturbation and Marital Sex Issues." You will get more of a response.
Second off, what type of problem is your wife having?
Why is she unable to have sex?
If you give us a complete description it will help you and us.
Questions I have:
Is your spouse's problem temporary or permanent? Did she always have this problem? What kind of a problem is it that she cannot have intercourse with you? Has she tried to get help for the problem?
How long have you had the problem with non-ejaculating during masturbation? Is this recent or has it always happened?
Have you had a complete physical checkup with a doctor -- a urologist is whose help you need --- let the doc find out if you have a physical problem with ejaculation. If not, it is psychological.
If it's a psychological one, maybe you grew up in a home where jerking off was considered dirty or sinful or prohibited or bad --- and this is what the meat of the problem is, so to speak.
Were you growing up in a home where religiosity was a big deal? That could be another reason --- lots of these religions see masturbation as evil. And it's nigh prohibited in many houses of worship.
What you need at that point is a sex therapist. He or she will work with you to get you over the "I can't come while jerking off" taboo.:)
There is more to intimacy with one's spouse than intercourse.
What about going down on her? or her going down on you? or having mutual oral sex? Or she masurbates and puts on a show for you?
There is also anal sex if you and she would like to, and can.
How about phone sex?
How about posing for hunky pictures -- they need not be of you naked -- and giving them to your wife?
Ladies pose for what's called bouidour photos - why not find a photographer and have him or her take some hunky pics of you? You can also DIY.
Your wife can do the same --- pose for sexy pictures and let you see them.
Strip for your wife! PIck out some music and put on a show for her some night. Have her do the same for you.:)
Writing each other old fashioned love letters will help, too. The whole point of all of this -- racy photos, strip shows for your wife, love letters and so forth --- is maintaining intimacy when you and she cannot have intercourse.
Hope this helps.
So long as you and your wife stick together on this and work on your problem together, that is your battle won. GL.
More ways to be intimate with your wife --and again, intimacy is much more than sex:
Do you tell her you love her?
Do you open doors for her, compliment her, tell her how fabulous she looks? Do you thank her for a great meal? Do you tell her how glad you are you met her and that she is everything to you?
Do so on a daily basis, if you're not doing it now!!
and he never returned.
Gee, thanks for the advice????