QOTD 7/8

minionlover

Now that you have been through your own wedding, do you secretly judge other people's weddings that you are invited to?

lehc723

I haven't been to one since my own! I will be at one in September, though. If anything, I think it taught me not to, to let everyone make their own decisions, whatever makes them happy, etc. But it does make me think about how much they're paying, since I've got that insider's perspective. 

WillyH19

I try really hard not to. To use my mom's favorite phrase, different people are different. If it makes them happy, and their wedding is how they want it, who am I to judge?

xxjen015

I've only been to one wedding since ours, and yes, I judged, but not in a mean way. My natural personality is to critique, but it's more of an observational, "oh, they did this differently, cool." kind of thing than "omg, can you believe this?" I love going to weddings and like willy said, if it makes them happy, what does my opinion matter? I'm not going to share anything negative with anyone but myself! I now know how expensive weddings truly are and that not everyone can afford a big wedding. We got a lot of free/discounted assistance from family, and it was still more than we'd planned even keeping everything cheap.

mana8503

No, I like when the wedding fits the couple... but I am side-eyeing the wedding with my CW that is being throw together in a 2 months because getting married is "financially better".  She's already admitted to over booking and I just seeing it being a hot mess.  I'll keep y'all updated!

And my MIL keeps letting me know how H's niece's wedding in Sept is "low key and not fancy" like our wedding.  And people are allowed to wear jeans.  I want to throat punch her.  If y'all remember, I had to tell her I prefered her not wearing jeans and sneakers to our wedding.  It was her son's wedding you can put on a dress or pant suit for us to have nice pictures of you! /rant that had nothing to do with the wedding, just my MIL being my MIL....

islandmonkey8

Judge? No. I don't think the way I look at other weddings has changed. I always decided before and now if I like something they did or not. But that's just my opinion on style, not a judgment on their choices. Who am I to judge how they get married and spend their money?

mrshall1027

We've been to two weddings since ours, one of which was 2 weeks later.  I don't know if it's really judging as much as comparing.  Like, I'll compare their food to ours, their cake to ours, etc.  The wedding two weeks after ours had an amazing DJ and I remember thinking, "I wish our DJ was this good".  They were both different and unique to the couple, so I don't think any of our weddings were better than the others.  Now, I do judge guests that come dressed like they work at a strip club.  At one of these weddings, there was a girl in such a short and tight dress, that she could hardly dance.  And when she did, her dress kept going up and up and finally she flashed her "goodies" to everyone.  That was pretty bad!!

sjs1013

I've always judged other weddings.  I always compared what was done to what I would do when my day came.  Not necessarily in a negative way, but I've always done it. 

Since our wedding, we've only been to one other wedding.  It was very different than our wedding in every way.  The only thing I negatively judged was the fact that they were married on the beach (which was gorgeous).  There were no chairs.  It was incredibly sunny and hot.  The ceremony was supposed to begin at 3:30.  We arrived around 3:15.  The groom didn't show until almost 3:45 and the bride arrived between 4:15 and 4:20.  Standing in the sun and heat was not fun, although it was nice to see many old friends and have time to catch up before we were wrapped up in the reception.  They did have buckets full of bottles of juice, water and iced tea.  For the kids, they had sand toys, all personalized for each child.  I thought those were nice touches.

pockysquirrel

I haven't been to a wedding since mine and doubt I'll do any IRL judging at the next one I attend. But I am a junkie for wedding shows on TV, and since I've been married my commentary when watching is a lot of "I'm so glad we didn't have to deal with X, I'm so glad my bridesmaids didn't pitch a fit about Y, I can't believe she spent that much money on Z", etc etc. Then again, I kind of feel like those shows are made for people to judge.

snuff9861

I havent been to a wedding since ours, but H is the best man in a wedding in 2 weeks and a CW is getting married in September. My CW is constantly asking for advice/opinions for her wedding, which is awesome I find. I never mind giving my opinion. The wedding that is H in will be interesting. It's a family wedding so I probably will compare decor, food etc.

minionlover

I do a little bit.  Some of it is more of an opinion thing though as in I wouldn't have picked this or that and some of it is stuff that just makes me crazy.  I do try to remember that it is not my wedding though.

We haven't actually been to one yet but we have one coming up at the begining of November.  We just got the STD for it on Saturday.  In my opinion there was no real point in sending them out this late but its not my wedding.  DH also got a text from another friend who is getting married in Oct which said, "If I need you to, would you be a groomsman?"  I am not really sure what this means but DH said yes.

 

catwine

'judge' is such a harsh word...but i have made comparisons at wedding after mine. my own cousin got married 3 weeks after us so a bunch of relatives were comparing stuff.

that being said, i realize that not everyone is as OCD about stuff as me when it comes to panning their wedding

music11

When I've been to other people's weddings, it made me feel grateful and so thankful for what a wonderful day we had!

brainybrunette

We're only been to 1 wedding since ours...it was at the sister venue of the place where we got married. I was really excited because I knew they would have a cocktail hour similar to the one that we had and I wanted to try the yummy apps again! They also had a wedding cake that was very similar to ours, except ours had better frosting. It was fun to get another piece of "our" wedding cake 2 months later : )

I do judge other people's weddings, but I'm not about how much they spent or things like that. You can do so much with a very limited budget! I do judge when the food is absolutely horrible (I went to one wedding where all I ate was chocolate fondu because the food was inedible!) or when absolutely no consideration is given to the comfort of their guests or if the couple is just rude (not thanking their guests, sending out a thank you note that wasn't even handwritten, etc).