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Ugh!
My parents have a pool and no gate. My mom promised that once Katie started walking, she would get a gate up around it. It is now over 3 months since she has been walking and still no gate. I have asked and asked and asked about this gate and they will not give me any answers on when they are going to get it.
Katie goes over there on Tuesdays to be watched-kind of like grandma/pa and Katie time. Matt is home, but I know my mom and dad want to spend time with her, so she goes there...Matt has been on me to get them to get this gate installed. Matt finally gave me an ultimatem and said that Katie is not to go over there (unless we are there with her) until that gate is up. Fine!
I have offered her money, our services, to call around, everything possible to get this darn gate up and they say that they are going to just do it themselves to save money. OK, I understand that. BUT....they just had their kitchen completely redone. Granite counters, new fridge, stove, microwave, tile floors, paint-you name it. (Their fridge started leaking and ruined their hard wood floors and they had to get it replaced and got a decent amount of money from insurance and decided to just redo everything).
Now, she emails me and says-I have some of Katie's stuff (her walker and some clothes) and wanted to bring them by at lunch if that is OK. I feel like she is breaking up with me or something. I know that it is probably just in my head, but I am just so sad.
All I want is to know when they are going to get this gate up.
Thanks for letting me vent! AAAHHHHH.....
Re: Ugh!
Big Hugs! Sorry Julie! I hope you get things squared away soon!
I'm at odds with my mom too...sort-of...so I know what you mean. It's awkward and it should have to be. Ai!
Big hugs again! GL!
Man, sorry you feel this way. ?It is horrible when you have to give parents ultimatums like that.
My mom is kind of the same. ?She is jealous because we take Jacob over to MIL, but MIL's house is clean and baby proof (my nephew lives there). ?My mom's house is never clean, and definitely not baby/kid proof. ?SHe has a balcony and the door to the balcony doesn't even lock, and the space between the slats in the balcony rail are large enough for J to get his body through. ?SO we told her, once her house is clean and kid proofed and a guard around the rail or a better lock on the door (preferably both) Jacob will not go over there!
HUGS! That's a horrible spot to be in, but I have to agree with Matt on this one. It'll be a lot less painful to have your parents upset with you than it would be to have a tragic accident happen that could've been prevented. Out here in AZ we have one of the highest accidental drowning rates in the nation. I couldn't even watch the news over the summer because it seemed like there was at least 1 child drowning daily in backyard pools.
oh no! Your mom isn't breaking up with you, but I totally know how you feel! That is something my mom would say.
Now this is based on my own experience asking my mom to do certain things for Blair's sake...but your parents probably think that you somehow don't think they can adequately provide for Katie's saftey --nevermind that they raised you without killing you!-- and are probably (in their own wierd way) insulted that you keep pressing the issue. I mean really, has anyone drowned in their pool yet? Hmm? And they would never let Katie drown, would they?
Of course, this is wierd grandparent logic as obviously they have forgotten what it is like to be directly responsible for the safety of a baby otherwise they'd have put the damn gate up already! Just keep pressing the issue and don't leave Katie there unattended until they do... your parents will get the point!
I know my mom watches Katie like a hawk. Her house is not baby proof and she knows that-well, she does have a gate on the bottom of the stairs-but that is it.
Matt's ex-gf was at her cousin's when her cousin's child fell into the pool and died. He saw how this tore up the family-everyone blamed everyone else. Also, one of the first calles he got was a baby not breathing. She was at a community pool with her younger sister and parents and I guess the parents each thought the other was watching her-no one was. His fears are very legit, and I agree with them.
My mom grew up with a pool in her back yard and my sister almost drowned if I did not get up to get a drink, she would have. She was 2 feet under and just floating there-at 2 years old. I guess my cousin almost did too. My mom said that she would never ever EVER let any thing happen, but I am more afraid that there would be an accident.
Katie has figured out how to get the pole out of the sliding door and has the concept of sliding the door open-it is too heavy for her now, but how knows how long she won't be able to do that.
I just feel horrible and almost sick.
I agree with Matt on this and more so when your parents had agreed to gate the pool. I would think your parents would run to gate that pool. I know I would, I certainly wouldn't want that burden of stress on my shoulders any time I had young kids visiting my home!
And to be honest, anyone with a pool should have a safety gate.
I keep telling myself that....I just had lunch with my brother and talked to him about it and he said that my mom feels like I don't trust her with Katie and that she feel sad that she can't be trusted. OMG! That is NOT it at all. I trust her with Katie more than anyone else-at all.
I guess I am going to have to have a talk with her and let her know that.
We had to put a gate around our pool. We found this stuff at home depot and it was easy to install and alot cheaper then a rod iron gate. http://www.protectachild.com/components.htm Good Luck!