Getting Pregnant
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Interesting article (m/c related)

Though I haven't experienced a m/c, a lot of this resonated with me and our 3T journey. This was shared on FB by a friend of mine who has twins. I know she had a m/c before the twins, so I'm praying her posting was more about that than a recent one. Enough blabbering. Here's the article:

TTC #1 since Feb. '12. dx: "unexplained" IF
After 2 shitty IVF cycles and 1 loss at 6+2 (EDD 11/7/14), DH and I are pursuing DIA.
11/17/2014 - ACTIVE AND WAITING!
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Pregnancy was never the end goal; being a mom was.
I've been holding out on GP: I got drunk once and started a blog: Here it is (11/7 update)
3T<3

Re: Interesting article (m/c related)

  • PR stuff related below: I actually really liked it. My experiences have been different, but during (t)ttc I hated pretty much everyone who was pregnant. And honestly I'm having a lot of trouble with that anger going away. I really though if I got pregnant it would disappear, but it hasn't. I'm still an angry bitter deep down.I still get irrationally angry when anyone other than a gper gets pregnant quickly. I'm rambling. You can ignore me.

    imageimageimage
           Me: All Normal DH: .5% Morph
    Cycles 1-14 (Natural) all BFN
                                  Starting IUI#1 procedures Nov '13
                          IUI Cxl'd due to surprise natural BFP 11/1/13
            Calvin born on June 19th, 2014 via emergency c-section at 3lbs7oz
         
  • Thank you so much for sharing this. I needed it. Really really needed it. I'm not quite to the full-on anger stage of grief yet, but I know it's going to come, and I'm a little afraid of just how it will feel.
    imageimage
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    TTC since July 2012
    BFP #1: 11/9/13; spontaneous m/c at 6w2d, 11/25/13
    BFP #2: 12/31/13. B/w 12/31: betas >1000, progesterone 13.6; B/w 1/2: betas 3065, progesterone 10.2
    B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
    Progesterone suppositories started 1/2. Please stick, baby!!
    Fiona Elise born 9/9/14 - welcome beautiful girl!
    image
    Badge Unicorn
    image
  • Big hugs to anyone feeling this way. I can't even begin to imagine the pain you've experienced.





    dx:  Unexplained IF (mild MFI)

     TTC since May 2011, 1 year trying, and then 3 TI, 2 IUI = BFN

    IVF #1 (May 2013):  Antagonist Protocol: 
    24R, 18M, 15F w/ICSI; 5dt of 2 early blasts, no frosties = BFN
    IVF #2 (August 2013):  Lupron Stop Protocol: 
    28R, 23M, 15F w/ICSI; 5dt of 1 partially hatched blast, 7 frosties = BFP
    EDD 5/23/14, blighted ovum (6w6d), D&C (8w6d)
    FET #1 (April 2014):  transferred 2 5d blasts = BFP

    C.J. born 01/09/15

    imageimage
  • I think there are a million emotions that follow loss. Some never go away. I don't think I ever experienced hate, but anger, bitterness, jealousy, devastation, guilt... Yeah. I don't think there is a right or wrong way to grieve and I think most emotions and processes are probably normal.
    IUI - BFP! Baby boy born still - August 2012
    IVF - BFP - miscarriage June 2013
    FET - BFN
    FET - BFN
    Switched clinics
    IVF with PGD - three embryos created, all healthy - July 2014
    FET - transferred two embryos (boy and girl) - Nov 2014 - BFP!
    Baby Boy born July 2015

  • Thank you for sharing this. It resonated with me 100%. I know it sounds awful, but I have experienced hate and rage like none other over our losses. I have lost friendships and honestly felt hate towards people I once thought I loved.

    I occasionaly babysit for a woman who has 2 children after a long and difficult IF journey, and she has confessed that she still feels bitterness towards other pregnant women. I suspect I will still have some bitterness even after we have a child.

    Married August 2009

    3 years. 5 losses.

    Our rainbow baby boy born 11.16.15

  • PR stuff related below: I actually really liked it. My experiences have been different, but during (t)ttc I hated pretty much everyone who was pregnant. And honestly I'm having a lot of trouble with that anger going away. I really though if I got pregnant it would disappear, but it hasn't. I'm still an angry bitter deep down.I still get irrationally angry when anyone other than a gper gets pregnant quickly.
    ^^ Ditto this for me. Especially knowing that we (ideally) would like to have more than one child, so I'm just going to have to go through the whole financial/emotional/physical drain of treatments again someday.  And because of all our issues getting pregnant and my previous losses, it's hard for me to be able to just relax and enjoy being pregnant--I'm constantly worried about when something might go wrong--and it makes me mad that I can't just be relaxed and blissfully ignorant. It makes me angry that it has to be so difficult for me (and many of you) to get and/or stay pregnant, and those who do get to receive that blessing so easily completely take it for granted and don't even realize how truly lucky they are.

    All of this. You'd said it better than me and brought up other things I was feeling. Glad we're not alone.

    imageimageimage
           Me: All Normal DH: .5% Morph
    Cycles 1-14 (Natural) all BFN
                                  Starting IUI#1 procedures Nov '13
                          IUI Cxl'd due to surprise natural BFP 11/1/13
            Calvin born on June 19th, 2014 via emergency c-section at 3lbs7oz
         
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